Da Mo Yao Chapter 16: Departure and Epilogue: Wishing for Twin Stars

We’re here! The end of volume 1 of Da Mo Yao, and I’m sure you all want me to stop chattering and start translating volume 2. If you told me two weeks ago I would have translated mostly word for word an entire volume of a Chinese novel, I would have laughed in your face. Clearly DMY holds me in its thrall, a novel that feels like it’s breathing and living a world that is magical and potent. While volume 1 is all pining, with hints and innuendo, that all ends here. From this point on, it’s action, passion, and suspense going a mile a minute. So savor the last bits of an undecided love triangle, and tighten your belts for the wild ride ahead.

Chapter 16: Departure

Fang Ru and Li Yan Nian are getting married and the house is merry with activity. The girls want to go crash the wedding night but I just smile and let them have fun. Hong Gu asks why I’m having Li Yan Nian move out, and I say it’s better if they have their own privacy to start their new life together. Hong Gu looks at me, she thinks I’ve been distancing myself from them recently. I change the subject and tell her to keep the party going, begging off to rest because I’m tired.

Fang Ru is getting dressed in her room, with the ladies all happy she chose the first day of the New Year for her wedding, but Fang Ru says the date was picked by me. She’s complimented on her beautiful wedding robe, and she says it’s also from me. I turn around and go back to my room. Today is a good day, the weather is clear and the sun is warm. There are lanterns everywhere and the happiness in the air is thick.

I sit down and put on make up, hearing the roar of noise outside indicating that the wedding party is here to pick up Fang Ru. I feel a tinge of sadness, this sound must be what every woman longs to hear. I put on my outfit and my hair piece and look in the mirror. I think about Brother Wolf in the desert, and twirl a few times in the room. My skirt billows out and I feel much happier.

The worst feeling is waiting, with my heart suspended, just like watching a pot boil. I look around for something to keep me occupied, and I find a rope where I proceed to knot and unknot it. After some time, I look out to see it’s already dusk. I walk outside and look in the yard, with the sun setting and the dark approaching.

Maybe he doesn’t want to see anyone, so he won’t come during the day time. He’s surely coming soon, so I stand by the door hoping and praying. Everyone has gone to the wedding banquet so the courtyard is especially quiet. A few drops land my cheek first, and soon it’s coming down in a flurry, the first snow. It’s not a lot, and comes down slowly and gently, dancing in the wind. It feels tender, but with the bitter cold, goes straight for the heart.

A squeak of the door opening, at that moment my heart exploded. My heart hurt so bad I couldn’t turn around. Because the happiness is so hard earned, the joy even comes with some pain.

I stood still for awhile before smiling and turning around, and then my smile freezes on my face. My heart fills with despair and I close my eyes hoping it’s not true. But when I open it again, he’s still standing there, still Huo Qu Bing.

“When I first saw you, you were wearing this outfit. Under the silver moonlight, with a silver wolf beside you, your skirt billowing in the wind, you were so light you didn’t appear human. I never once took notice of any woman, but I couldn’t stop staring at you, wondering where you came from, wondering where you were going.” Huo Qu Bing explained with a wistful smile.

I hold my head with my hands and crouch down on the ground. He is shocked and tries to help me up. “Don’t…..don’t bother with me….” I murmur over and over again. He slowly withdrew his hand.

Huo Qu Bing pays no heed to the snow on the ground, despite his rich attire, and silently sits down next to me. It appears that no matter how long I’m crouched there, he’s going to silently keep me company.

The snow lightly falls on us, and he hesitates for a moment before reaching over and brushing the snow off me. I don’t move, like I’m an ice sculpture. He stood up and walked into the house, emerging with a bamboo umbrella. He quietly returned to my side and opened the umbrella over me. He silently looked up at the falling white flakes.

Xiao Qian and Xiao Tao return to the yard. Xiao Qian lands next to me, but Xiao Tao zooms straight for my head. With a flicker of his sleeve, Huo Qu Bing waves Xiao Tao off course so she wasn’t able to be mean to me this time. She lands next to Xiao Qian.

Huo Qu Bing goes to grab Xiao Tao and Xiao Qian wants to peck him. Huo Qu Bing avoids his beak and bops him on the head lightly “I was just getting the letter on Xiao Tao’s leg, not trying to be mean to her.” I hesitated and the opened the cloth on Xiao Tao’s leg. “I’m sorry” is scribbled messily on it.

I’m sorry? I’m sorry! I don’t want your “I’m sorry.” I feel the bitterness rising and I bite my lips so hard I can taste the blood. I tried to rip the cloth but my hands are shaking and the cloth is small so I can’t rend it even in a few tries.

I jump up and run into the house holding the cloth. I start tossing everything in sight. Huo Qu Bing stands at the door and watches me go insane and upending everything in my room. Scissors, where is the scissors? I still can’t find the scissors, and then I see a small fruit knife on the table. I grab the knife and hear him calling me “Yu Er”, and then he’s in front of me, trying to take the knife away. But he stops when he sees me slicing up the cloth. He backs up and watches me rip it into shreds.

I threw the knife to the side and rip off my veil and hairdress. Using my hands, I pull it apart until the pearls have scattered everywhere and bits and pieces of the veil are floating in the air. I stare at the falling bits of blue on the ground, and suddenly all my rage is spent. I collapse on the ground and stare at everything, seeing nothing.

Huo Qu Bing sits on the door ledge, with his arms around his legs and his chin resting on his knees, just staring at the ground. He’s so quiet he resembles an injured wolf, just sitting there licking his own wounds in the corner.

I don’t know how much time has passed, when I suddenly hear laughter. Everyone is coming back from the banquet. I startle and jump up, quickly saying with a smile and laughter “I ate so early that I’m hungry. I want to eat birthday noodles today. Today is my birthday. I should be happy. I need to change. Can you…..”

Huo Qu Bing turns his back to me and I take off my Luo Lan outfit and put on a flaming red dress robe. I’m not sad, I refuse to be sad. I refuse to be sad because of a person who doesn’t like me. I hold the blue Luo Lan outfit and repeat this to myself, but a stabbing pain passes through my heart. I recall our meeting at the Yue Ya Spring, but it feels like multiple lifetimes ago. I smile, I smile so hard my body starts to shake.

The knife comes down, and with a loud rip, the skirt has been split in half. Huo Qu Bing hears the sound and turns back towards me, with a small sigh “Why do you even bother….he gave you that?”

I tossed the skirt aside and walked out of the room. Huo Qu Bing picked up the umbrella and walked beside me. My heart is colder than the snow, so how could I fear this bitter cold. I hurry up “I want to walk in the snow.” He doesn’t say a word, just tossing the umbrella aside and walking in the snow with me.

I don’t want to see anyone so I purposely walk in the dark areas. He suddenly asked me “Do you know how to make noodles?” I say no, and he replies “My estate keeps the kitchen fires on at night. Big dishes we can’t make right now, but a bowl of noodles can be produced.” Hong Gu is strict so the fires are turned off at night, so I nod and follow him.

I stare at the bowl of noodles and eat a few bites. I tried to smile and chat with Huo Qu Bing, but my tears start to fall. It falls into the soup, drops and drops of it. I hurry to pick up the bowl and eat the noodles with big bites.

Huo Qu Bing pretends he doesn’t see and keeps talking. I ask “Any alcohol?” and he gets up and grabs two bottles. Along with it, he brought a towel. He doesn’t look at me, and just keeps his eyes trained outside the window, looking at the snow falling in the darkness, drinking his wine.

I’m half awake and I can already smell the fragrance. When I’m fully awake, I realize that there are two silver scented heat balls hanging over the bed. This room is luxuriously appointed, and I immediately recall that I must’ve gotten drunk and passed out at the Huo Estate. Looking at the silver balls, I suddenly miss Brother Wolf. Right now I can only alleviate my pain and exhaustion by putting my arms around his neck.

A maid calls out if I’m awake, and I hear Huo Qu Bing outside. He walks in “Don’t lay in bed all day, it’s past noon, any lazier and you won’t be able to sleep tonight.”

I lay there not moving and he sits down next to me on the pallet “Head hurting?” I touched my head and wonder “No, usually it hurts when I get drunk, but not today. What kind of wine did we drink last night?”

“What different wine? It’s the fragrant silver balls above your head. I had the physician put some medicinal herbs in there for you.”

The maid was waiting there for me, so I sigh and get up. I can’t hide forever, the day keeps going on “I’m getting up, shouldn’t you give me some privacy?”

He laughed and got up “Lazy cat. Move faster because I’m hungry. Any later and you’ll only have table scraps to eat.”

…………………………………………..

I reach my hand out to play with the baby Liu Bo, who grabs me with his soft chubby finger, cooing back at me. I laugh and ask why he’s laughing? After he’s carried away by the nanny, I sit and talk with Li Yan. She teases that Liu Bo should call me auntie but I don’t dare joke around like this. I confirm she’s feeling better, and she asks if something happened between me and Shi Enterprises. I don’t answer and change the topic, congratulating her on the news that Li Cai, Li Gan’s uncle, has become the new Prime Minister. Her face doesn’t move but she murmurs a soft thanks.

As I walk out, she suddenly asks me to help her. I reply “From the day I helped you into the Palace, I already told you I cannot help you within the Palace.” She doesn’t believe me “You’re lying. Everything you do is calculated, I just don’t know what you are planning.”

I don’t respond, because my original plan was wrong, and now I have no plan at all left. Li Yan finally asks that I never oppose her. While Empress Wei has the Great General Wei as her brother, Li Yan has no one to help her in the Palace. She wishes I were her real sister, so she wouldn’t have to walk this road all alone. I look at her “You can relax. Nothing I do in the future will concern you, and I won’t block your way.”

She nods “You must always remember what you just said.”

Before heading out, I stop “Li Yan, take good care of yourself. Read some medical books and learn to regulate your own health. The lonelier you are, the more you need to take care of yourself.” She thanks him, she will do this because she has a son now.

After leaving Li Yan’s chambers, I run into Huo Qu Bing. I bow to him. We head off, but I purposely walk three steps behind him. He turns to me “You are this careful in the Palace?” I remind him “You and I have different positions, if people saw us walking side by side, it would just lead to chatter.” He looked annoyed and I explained further “I know you don’t give a damn about this stuff, and have people who let you get away with it, but it’s better to be safe and leave yourself some room for escape in any situation.”

He huffed “Seeing the way you restrict yourself annoys me. In the future, don’t come to the Palace unless you have to.” I laugh “Have you been busy recently? Since the New Year, it’s been two months since I’ve seen you.”

His face lit up “I’m playing for big stakes this time, of course I need to prepare. Oh right, are you going back to Xi Yu or not?” I hesitated “I don’t know.” He was livid “You don’t know? He’s already this way……and you, you still….you, you…” He was stomping away but turned back around and pointed at me. I stood there just looking back at him. He suddenly shook his head and took off, like he wanted to shake all the unpleasantness away “I think you’re a masochist, just itching to be mistreated. Yet I’m even worse of a masochist than you, simply dying to be mistreated!”

…………………………………….

The gardener checks on the vines, telling me it’s not sprouted by now, it’s likely dead. He wanted to buy new ones for me but I say it’s not necessary. A guest arrives, and it’s Housekeeper Chen from the Huo Estate. He bowed to me and explained “Since the young master has been so busy recently, he’s rarely home and can’t find the time to come. He wanted me to tell you that he’s leaving for Xi Yu tomorrow at dawn.” I thanked him, while he gave me a warm twinkling smile.

After dinner, I return to my room and sit there in a daze, not sure what I’m thinking about. I lit the lamp and took out a small brazier. From the chest I removed all the diary cloths. It makes me smile, but then I know that sometimes all the hopes and hard work still only ends up with heartbreak. I toss the first cloth in the fire, letting it burn in a bright red blaze. I continue to read each entry and then burn it. I burn a few more before I stop, deciding that since I wrote these for him, might as well let him read it now. Nothing left to lose, and a way to end this for good.

I pick up the gold jade earrings and put it in the chest. I pick up the Xiang Fei Zhu flute and play a few notes. I’m cleaning up the things related to you. If only I could clean up my heart the way I’m cleaning up this room, easily throwing things out, perhaps there would be less sorrow and anger in this world.

I wander outside the Shi Estate for awhile before vaulting over. Outside the Bamboo Residence, I leave the chest at the door. After some time, I start playing the flute. The light suddenly turns on inside and the door opens. Jiu Ye stands there on his crutch. In the dark, his face is white with shock. I finish playing three times before I stop. I tell him “You once said that I was not suited to play the Bai To Ying tune because it was so sorrowful. Today I finally understand. With my emotions connecting with the tune, I should have played it well. But I wish I could never play it well, that I would never understand its meaning.”

At the end, I control myself, and with a hard clean snap, I’ve broken the flute in half. Before the broken halves of the flute have even hit the ground, I’ve vaulted on the roof. I hesitate for a moment but it is still silence below. I shake my head and fly forward, completely and utterly given up.

………………………………………

Hong Gu,

I’m gone. When you find this letter you will be furious. Please don’t be angry, which will just give you more wrinkles. I’m giving you all the businesses I run in Chang An. You must remember that the dancing business, you need to teach the girls well and treat them well. You might want to close down some of the businesses, or at least not expand anymore, and just protect what you already have. Burn this letter after reading it. I have left another detailed business plan for you. I know I’m being immature, but I’ve tried hard to be a Chang An person since coming here. I try to control my words and actions, but now I suddenly feel exhausted. I miss the freedom of my life in Xi Yu. So I’m leaving, and maybe one day I’ll come back. Or maybe I’ll never come back. Please don’t miss me, Hong Gu. And one last thing – in 10 days to 1 month, please deliver this other letter to the Huo Estate.

Yu Er

………………………………………..

Xiao Huo,

I’m going back to Xi Yu. I’m sorry but I won’t be going with you. When you see this cloth, it should be a few months later already, when you return victorious yet again to the Palace. Perhaps I will be off chasing a sheep with Brother Wolf. Or maybe doing nothing except watching the sun set over the West. You asked me, are tangled vines really how complicated life ought to be? I thought about it, and perhaps life really is like the gold silver flower vines. But it’s not about being tangled up. Flowers bloom and flowers wilt. When the gold silver flowers meet, it twists and turns, like meeting and then departing. Fate binds and fate separates, this vine is but a representation of life’s many gatherings and partings. This time my decision is to turn and leave. This parting might lead to never meeting again. I wish you all the best.

Xiao Yu

Epilogue: Wishing for Twin Stars

In the dark night, she’s dressed in red, like a burning flame.

Meng Jiu knew she was in a bad mood, because normally she disliked wearing vibrant colors. But when she’s in a bad mood, she’ll force herself to wear something bright. Like the color would tell the world that she’s perfectly fine, hiding her sadness and weakness inside the bold hue.

Her eyes are filled with fire as well, giving the lonely Bamboo Residence a bit of warmth. He desperately wanted to keep the warmth by his side, but he couldn’t. This woman, who came and went like the wind, her life as vibrant as the morning dew, he wanted her to always live under the bright light. He wanted her to have the most complete happiness, without a single flaw in her life.

He asked her “Do you want a family?” and she said yes. He wanted it too, but he couldn’t give it to her. The fire in her eyes, was it love or hate? When she broke the flute, his heart also shattered. The look in her eyes when she looked at him, it was dead within. Did she hate him for not saying a single word? If only she knew, that he was afraid to say even one word, because then he would ask her to stay.

The red shadow disappears over the rooftop and he controls himself from calling out. His heart is in pain, and he coughs up some blood. He’s been sick, and now with this emotional pain, he barely has the strength to stand. He tosses the crutch aside and sits down on the door step. He pulls the chest over and takes out cloth after cloth of her feelings for him. She knew so much more than he thought, and did so much more for him than he knew.

Reading each word, his heart started to burn, and his body felt like ice. Did he really have this happiness? He reads more and then his face suddenly lights up. He calls out for his servants and immediately heads out. The sun is barely rising from the East, like her brilliant smile. He stared at the rising sun and felt happiness and pain. Yu Er, Yu Er, I really underestimated you. I’ve hurt you so badly, but I will use my entire life to make it up to you. From now on, I won’t let you have a single second of sadness.

The carriage arrives at Luo Yu House and already he can hear the commotion. Hong Gu is yelling at everyone for not seeing anything. He’s introduced to Hong Gu, who is shocked this beautiful young man is the Big Boss. She thought to herself – that arrogant son of the Heavens Huo Qu Bing, like the brightest sun and the sturdiest oak, I thought he and Yu Er was the most perfect match in this world. But who knew there was a man like this, his pale moon a contrast to the bright sun, neither winning out over the other.

Jiu Ye is in a rush to see Yu Er, but Hong Gu tearfully explains that she’s gone, and says she won’t be coming back anymore. Jiu Ye’s heart jerks and he starts coughing violently. Yu Er, I knew your true feelings only after I read the clothes, and now I know how deeply you must be hurt. Hong Gu explains Yu Er’s letter revealed she was headed to Xi Yu. She also left a letter for General Huo, to be delivered in a few days, but Hong Gu was so mad she sent it already to the Huo Estate.

Tian Cao immediately assures Jiu Ye that he will send people to find her, and that all of Xi Yu will be looking for her. Jiu Ye wants all the courts of the Xi Yu kingdoms notified so that their armed forces can join in the search. Tian Cao is shocked, knowing that Jiu Ye has never asked for help from those countries to keep his connection with them on the down low. He must really be determined to find Yu Er this time.

…………………………..

It is still dark outside but Huo Qu Bing has already dressed in his armor, ready for deployment. “Did you tell her I was leaving today for war?” Housekeeper Chen confirmed that he told her personally. Huo Qu Bing stood at the front door for some time, until the sun gradually began to rise. His heart sighed, looks like she still wants to stay in Chang An. He packed up all his emotions and leaped on the horse. The sound of the horse hooves on the ground ringing through Chang An’s streets.

Love and personal feelings need to be set aside for now. His mission is to focus on this war, which the entire court is waiting to see him fail. Last time he took 800 men and ambushed the Xiong Nu army base, emerging victorious. But people were still not satisfied, calling it a lucky victory. Even the Emperor remains wary, not ready to give him a full army to lead into war. Some generals spend an entire lifetime and never become a Grand Duke. He’s just 18 years old and already his battle victory is renowned around the world, leaving people envious and ready to see him fail.

This time he’s been given ten thousand men, as a test of his capabilities by the Emperor. Only by succeeding can he shut the traps of those scholar officials in court. Huo Qu Bing already knew he would succeed. Or more accurately, the word “failure” does not appear in his vocabulary. Anything he wants to do, he can do it, except…..

He thought of that crafty stubborn girl and he shook his head. He glanced towards Luo Yu House and his initial cold expression warmed up a bit. No, there is no except. In Huo Qu Bing’s life, there is nothing he can’t achieve, much less her.

After a day of travel, when he’s about to rest, a letter arrives for him. It’s not an army dispatch, but from Housekeeper Chen. His heart lurched and he opened it. After reading the letter, his eyes saw red. All the pain in his heart coalesced together. Yu Er, you lied to me yet again.

He stared intently at the cloth, and slowly a small icy smile appeared on his lips. This is her first letter to him, but it will not be her last letter to him. He stood up and called out of the tent “Have the two fastest horse prepared and ready to leave at any time.” Yu Er, you can’t possibly be harder to chase than the wily Xiong Nu?

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Da Mo Yao Chapter 16: Departure and Epilogue: Wishing for Twin Stars — 91 Comments

  1. i can’t remember where i read this comment but it really resonated.. that reader commented that JiuYe was destined not to be with Yu-er from the moment he gave her the dress in the earlier chapters.. Because it was a LuoLan wedding dress and while it was his gift, he never got to see her wear it even if in this chapter she intended it for him. The first person to see her in this dress was HQB… and now, the last person to see her in it is also HQB… i love how TH always lays these “fu2 bi2”, these seemingly nondescript little details in the earlier chapters that suddenly makes so much sense in the latter chapters…

    and congratulations on completing the first novel! i’m actually astounded by the speed at which you managed it.. you’ve been spoiling us! but im utterly thankful! for your dedication and craft- i can only imagine how much you love DMY to be able to commit yourself to this… and onwards to volume 2 and more HQB hotness! i dare not lay claim on HQB (and HuGe) but shall remain eternally grateful because i KNOW you will be the bearer of good news whenever goodies for the drama come out =)

    • cool, thanksomuch.. didnt catch d part where it says that was a wedding dress. can i just say how much i love a writer that foreshadows?

      p/s: hope they remember to highlight the dress as part of d drama since its rather significant & sweet xp

      • actually i didnt catch that part about the wedding dress either (along with alot of other foreshadowings until i either 1) reread the book via koala-san’s translations 2) read other reader’s comments on online forums) but after i read that reader’s analysis… it made soooo much sense with her reaction to first meeting with HQB in the desert where she turns back to glance at him and finds him still staring at her unwaveringly.. that is also the first time Yu-Er blushed in the book? which again underscores how beautifully this novel is written..

      • ps. can i just say how much i love this ‘book club’ thing going on on this site? i’ve been a silent reader on this blog for drama recaps for ages.. but it’s only now that i’m delurking cos i just HAD to respond to the novel and some of the very very incisive comments by some readers here… and i normally skim over the comments section yet now, i’m refreshing this page ever so often just to see what others have to say about DMY and the characters (and to share in the HQB lurveeee…kekeke)

      • OMG. Thanks for this note! I didn’t notice this either. Wow, I love Tong Hua’s little details. In BBJX, there were a lot of details like this too.

    • and if i may continue that analogy, it’s akin to JY giving her away for marriage with his blessings…. in the second novel *SPOILER*, it’s like he’s doing everything he can to help JY when she asks for it, even if it means helping his rival in love.. kind of like a fatherly figure preparing his daughter’s dowry- by gifting her the LuoLan wedding dress, it kind of hinted that JY and YE were never meant to be and he was destined to give her his blessings.

    • I WOULD LOVE TO THANK MISS KOALA TOO! I normally am a silent reader on the internet but I have got to come out just to say what’s on my mind. I just finished watching the drama construction of Da Mo Yao and I thoroughly loved it, to the point where even to a week after I have finished, I am experiencing withdrawal symptoms right now. I can rewatch this drama over and over and the emotions will hit me just as strongly…

      EDDIE PENG – the ultimate HQB. I used to be excited that HU GE was going to play a significant role (I didn’t know of the character HQB back then) but after watching the drama, Hu Ge is very well suited to act Jiu Ye instead. Eddie has a lively seductive mischievousness that Hu Ge actually lacks, instead Hu Ge can portray the inner turmoil and torn despair of Jiu Ye extremely well since he is a very calm and collected person in real life. HQB’s suaveness and intensity is actually very similar to Eddie’s personality in real life.

      I have always loved Eddie since Chinese Paladin, but this performance really shook me to the core and affirmed his acting ability. Not only am I experiencing withdrawal symptoms of not watching the drama but of not seeing him. I can’t seem to exist in reality anymore now…

  2. I would have stayed with someone dying if I really love him, it pure bliss a joy to share the sufferring of someone I love….I did it once I can do it again…. shucks I need to breathe this is sad…. SAAAAAD!!!!! 🙁

  3. Captain Koala, you have amazing timing! I was just itching to write down all of my thoughts concerning JY’s “break-up” with Jiu Ye, but I refrained in the last chapter because I didn’t want to spoil it for other people. But now that we’re here, don’t mind me if I just let fly! 😀

    So, I initially started off DMY by shipping Jiu Ye and JY, but then I switched over to HQB and JY. While rationally, I can understand Jiu Ye’s wish to not tie JY down and hence his “noble idiot syndrome”, ultimately, love waits for no one, and if you can’t for once be selfish enough to grab at it when the chance is presented to you, then you can’t blame anyone for when the opportunity passes you by. As Jiu Ye realizes to his detriment, he underestimated the level of feeling that JY possessed for him. He didn’t actually believe that she could be with him, disability or not, and still be happy. And so because he couldn’t trust that she knew what she was doing, that opportunity is now lost to him forever. At least he isn’t selfish about it, and I still do feel sympathetically towards him, but at this time, I’m all about having JY get together with HQB, who has been nothing but steadfast towards her and who would be all too happy to eat her up if she would just let him. 😉

    As for JY, I’m glad that she decided to make a clean break of it, or as clean of a break as she could make it. That is one aspect of hers that I like, that she throws her all into everything that she does, so even though she’s still technically not over Jiu Ye, and though I’m sure he’ll always still harbor a special place in her heart, at least when JY does pledge herself to HQB later (umm, spoiler?), I trust that she’ll treat HQB whole-heartedly, as she once did Jiu Ye.

    • I’m a big BIG HQB shipper. But I have to say that jiu ye does have it tougher on him to decide.
      HQB can be steadfast both in his life and love life because unlike Meng Jiu, his situtation seem much less complex for him (at this point anyway). His loyalty is to his country, and his King is his aunt’s husband, and he is a general in the army under his uncle. Every one in Chang An has to acknowledge his status. In terms of love, Yu er’s low-class origin and profession could be a big problem on her part he potentially needs to consider (which he doesn’t ^^), but he doesn’t have anything else to consider really on his own person, anything to feel “guilty” loving her about.
      Jiu Ye, on the other hand, is torn between Han and Xi Yu. His loyalty is also messed up as well. He supports Xi Yu, his root, but also has deep personal attachment to Han people, and culture. He’s right in the middle of political conflicts (so is HQB, but HQB tends to stay out of it), with the constant watch of the King on him. It’s dangerous and maybe that’s why he was so hesitant to get Yu Er in. It’s not as easy to be straightforward if what you’re hiding is such a big thing. As for her and him as man and woman, aside from endangering her and involving her in his family matters and business, he also has to consider the fact that he’s disabled, can’t provide her with a family, etc.
      I’m not saying this makes him a better man than HQB, nor does it mean his washy-wishy attitude would have been different if the situation was different, or is something right. And I definitely do not mean to make light of HQB’s steatfast attitude with Yu Er, even in the face of rivals. It’s just that knowing all the factors of Jiu oppa has to consider, it makes it easier for me to understand how those internal struggles can result in his indecisiveness.
      Anw, in the end, between the two, HQB and his unwavering love is definitely better for Yu Er. With Jiu Ye, it’s just not meant to be.

      • I agreed. You have thoughtful consideration for all parties. I can only say that it is JY’s fate not marrying Jie Ye and instead ending up with HQB. But Jie Ye does have it hard and is very pitiful. He is a good man though to still accept it. All in all, as heart-broken as JY is, she is one lucky woman to have the hearts of 2 wonderful men.

  4. Thanks for the update! I can’t believe it’s the end of the 1st book already…. can’t wait for book 2.

    Just wondering, is this book shorter than BBJX? For some reason I feel like more things happened in the first half of BBJX than DMY (as much as I love DMY)… maybe it’s because BBJX has more characters that it feels longer?

  5. Whew! I can tell this is about the get epic. But man, that bit from Jiu Ye’s perspective just about broke my heart in two. He deserves it in a fashion for being a giant lunkhead, but still. Ouch.

  6. omg yayayayay!!! thanks! xp

    cant imagine all d hotness d moment HQB finds JY… oh dear, how are we gonna last til the drama is out, HOW???

  7. Wow breaking the rare and expensive flute he made for her in half in front of him was quite the symbolic gesture that she was through with pining after Jiu Ye! Great exit! Now on to Volume 2!

  8. OMG!!! this chapter totally throws me on Huo Qu Bing’s side! I’m totally rooting for him now. I absolutely love his doggedness n how he scorns his own masochism. Puahahaha.

    Jiu Ye, Jiu Ye….*sigh* u have yet to realize that once u break a woman’s heart (especially a strong willed woman like Yu Er), second chances are non-existent. Maybe u’ll obtain her sympathy, but no longer will she give u her heart.

    But i’m of a different opinion when u say that Yu Er does not realize she’s in love with HQB
    and does nothing to lead him on. Lets just say i hope she owns up on her feelings for HQB in Book2. Oth, hats off to Yu Er for breaking the flute in front on Jiu Ye. She slightly redeemed herself in my eyes for that clean break. I just hope she doesnt waver n crush HQB’s heart for the 2nd time.

    Thanks so much for the blow by blow summary of this wonderful book. I was never intetested in chinese period novels but this!!….this is definitely my new crack. N its all thanks to u. I read the episode recaps for BBJX on another site n the storyline totally turned me off coz there was too much push n pull, excessive noble idiocy n the main OTP didnt end up together. Sigh… Admittedly i was sceptical bout DMY when u said its frm the same author. Now, i cant wait to see what happens next. I hope HQB gets his love! I get first dibs on YZX! ^^

  9. oh wow! thatnk you. i really do wish i paid attention in my chinese class but you r just way too awesome for translating so that i can enjoy these books too!!! thank you thank you!

  10. At least Jiu Ye finally read her diary cloths and finally knows that he just threw his happiness away. I know once he finds her again he will try to reclaim her heart to no avail.

    Thanks Koala for the book summaries!

  11. Title:Waiting for sunrise

    For this man who waits for his last breathe
    I choose to stay by his side to care for his suffering
    For angels sings among those who fight their inner battles
    I shall sit with my harp and sing songs of eternal life
    For only in rythm amd melody can I tie my heart in a bow
    For this man who has lost all his will,
    I shall surrender all my strength and my armor
    Shall he rest all his worries in my arms
    And sleep soundly at the aroma of peace through the
    beating of my heart
    Together we shall wait for sunrise as I press his head against my chest
    It is pure bliss and joy to share a long lasting tears of the man I will forever love
    As I wait for the sun to set at my own dying breathe….

  12. LET THE CHASE BEGIN!!

    I can’t believe that it’s the end of the book one. It felt so fast but THANK YOU so much for your effort and dedication for translating for us. I just can’t believe how wonderful this story is and will be.

    I am also glad we got to read from both the men’s POV. It shows how a man would think and how to calcuate his next move.

    I am so excited and to know that they are only 20-18- and 16 or 17 and so much heat love is going one!!

  13. Thanks so much Koala for translating the novel in a such lighting speed… i am looking forwards to book 2 even though i have already read it… but your translation is wonderful that your words actually make me understand the story better…

    I love YE’s character… she loves Jiu Ye and she is very brave and not shame about it… she probably knows that HQB like her.. but she did not do anything to mislead him.. YE is very clear about her feeling in the book 1… I applause her for making a clean break from JY and leave…

    about HQB.. How awesome is him just being there for her when she was raged and so heartbroken from that ‘I am sorry’ letter from JY… he has always been there for her not expecting anything in return… such a wonderful guy… but then at the end when he got the letter from YE.. he is charging full speed ahead and determine to get YE… such a romantic…

    oh JY… one of those guys that think way too much and too reserved.. we all know this kind of guy almost has very little chance to get the girl… i do like the ending of book 1 after he read all the cloth diary and how determine he is to find YE.. there’s no doubt that he do love her in return…

    the 3 main characters in DMY are solid and well written.. the love triangle is epic… as far as JY and HQB… i love them both… I like JY even though he is being so cold to YE.. and at the end of book 2.. i love him even more almost as much as i love HQB… may be HQB win my heart just a little bit more… there is really nothing bad about HQB….

    looking forwards to book 2 and when is the final casting gonna come out… who is going to be JY.. and who is going to the beautiful Li Yan… all the other interesting side characters.. the enticipation is killing me!

    Thanks again Koala for doing such a great job for translation the novel.. and looking forwards for more.. and at the same time… do get some rest!

  14. Um, Jiu Ye…I have no words. You’re a little late. And your timing is horrible. Oh, and I’m mad at you. You could have had her, but now she’s lost to you…forever! Wow, that was dramatic. Argh, he’s so silly!!! In the end, we ourselves lay the biggest stones in our own way.

    I’m a little annoyed at HQB’s arrogance, as well. “Oh, I can have anyone I want!” I don’t know, that makes me dislike him a little, it’s just so selfish.

    Thank you so much, Miss Koala, this is so awesome, I love reading it! ^^ I wish there were a third guy who was a mixture of JY and HQB, that’d be awesome! =D

    • It may sound arrogant but it’s actually more confidence+ self-motivation. Sometimes you need strong determination like this to be able to achieve your goals…

      • no all you need is a heart to persevere….or you might end up losing to something that could have been the best thing in your life….sometimes we aim and achieve things that in the end will not makes us the person we ought to be….and that’s when identity crisis sets in….humility is also the courage to be sincere to yourself by disappointing the rest of the worlds useless expectations 😉 its the same thing as an artist who have been discouraged to sing because the people he loved the most did not believe in him… 😉

    • I cried when Jiu Ye finally realized how much love Yu Er had for him. But it’s too late for him. Its like the lover vine now dead, her love for Jiu Ye could never be revived.

      If he shows the same determination in vol 2 as he has in this epilogue, that will make 2 men chasing for Yu Er. No more reservation and i am expecting we are going for a fun ride.

  15. Dear Kuola, I have also possessed hard copy of the novel and finished reading them last year. I could not help but keep reading your translation of this novel. You have translated the story so beautifully and done great justice to TH work especially some of the old chinese words in the novel is so difficult to convey in another language. Thank you that I am enjoying reading the story again but in different language.

  16. KOALA UNNIE!
    Omg! I read the first volume the whole night. *twitch twitch*
    Poor Jiu Yu! He’s probably gonna be too late. I hear his heart shattering already T_T. Tong Hua just loves hurting her second leads (Still holding a grudge because of 8th Hahahah) . Psssh but that’s what he gets for pushing her away. Now the chase is on! But but… Huo Qu Bing… something tells me he’s going to kill me with his hotness soon. I can totally picture Hu Ge as him in my head. Thaaaaaaank you for bringing something awesome in my life again! I’m still stuck in post BBJX mode. =__=. Can’t find a drama nowadays that doesn’t make me sleepy.

    Random note: I hope they’ll use actual dogs/wolves when they filmed this.

    • “Random note: I hope they’ll use actual dogs/wolves when they filmed this.”

      They better find some trained ones because that is one of the most endearing qualities of the novel..her relationship with the wolves. Now that she’s off to find Brother Wolf, I hope he has a family of his own and the cubs melt her heart some more……

      • oh you won’t be disappointed.. *spoiler* the scenes with Brother Wolf in the 2nd novel are seriously… adorable… yet in between Tong Hua has managed to weave in some emotional stirrings of the heart into her paragraphs about Yu-Er’s interactions with Brother Wolf and family.. and can you just imagine HQB meeting his ‘brother in law’? ><

      • Awww wolf cubs <3. Yea they better! I'm really hoping they won't use "technology" and have them all poorly animated.

  17. Yeah, seriously, the break neck pace at which you are churning out these chapter translations is beyond my imagination. Thank you!!!! What a convincing love triangle.

    I have been happily married for 24 years. And I have to confess that in the past, my number one pet peeve with my beloved was when he acted like Jiu Ye, making decisions (with the best intention, mind you) . . . based on what he thinks my preferences are without speaking with me directly about my thoughts on the matter.

    Onward to volume 2. Sleep well and thanks again for your *hard* work.

  18. Yu Er is causing so much trouble. Now, both men are on the chase….OMO.
    How will this end??? If HQB does not get the girl, I will be disappointed. Sorry Jui Ye but you had your opportunity and let it go….It’s time for the man you talked about treating her well to fill her heart.

    “He stared intently at the cloth, and slowly a small icy smile appeared on his lips. This is her first letter to him, but it will not be her last letter to him.”

    He sees the glass half full. I like the way HQB thinks.

    Thanks Ockoala! You are a dear. And, you’ve stirred up a hornet’s nest because now I cannot wait for this drama to start due to the buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. 🙂

  19. I was a little harsh in my last comment, I’m sorry, characters of Da Mo Yao! I’m going to stick to the mix between HQB and JY thing, though.

    Argh, the passage where he says he’s scared to say anything, because then he’d ask her to stay, I was thinking: “Just ask her!”

    He’s trying to do what’s best for her, but in that, he’s kind of being selfish, too. He should have been straight with her and given her a choice from the get-go.

    And HQB is really, really nice to her, but also kind of obsessive. I always think that if you really love someone, you just want the best for them. When these people all go: “No, you have to be mine!” I always think that that isn’t true, pure love. And he’s making things hard for himself by excluding failure from his vocabulary. I know he’s still young, but in some ways he’s just so immature!

    Anyway, I’ll just accept he’ll end up with her now, I’m sorry!

    • Hmmm..I don’t think HQB is obsessive. More like persistent and passionate. He knows what he wants and he will do everything to get it. But what I love about HQB, and I’ve said this before, is that he gives her space. He doesn’t push himself on her. Yes, he follows her around but he doesn’t interfere with her decisions nor does he tells her what to do.

  20. finally the end of volume 1, yeahhhh. I have been a stalker since i read this translation.
    And i just fall in love to these characters.
    I’m a shipper for Jin Yu and Jiu Ye and just hope in volume II, Jin Yu knows Jiu Ye’s feeling.

    And i always hate when you know you love someone but just because one thing, like your health, make you stop yourself to pursue happiness.
    that a crazy thing to do. Just because u have a short life, u must pursue and get the happiness that you deserve too.. Jiu Ye, you are so dump, how can you let the person who love you so much slipping away under your nose??? *sorry, just cant stand forJiu Ye’s thinking.

    can wait for the next chapter and already feel excited…

  21. I’ve been lurking in your website for over a year reading your recaps. This marvellous translation that you’re doing has prompted me to write my views.

    Your writing is so vivid and it sparks my imagination. Unlike a video or tv show, I go back to your entries and read them at least twice and I picture in mind how the main characters interact.

    Yu-er is such a passionate heroine and she lives her life fully – a bit of carpe diem, where you seize the day and live life fully without too many regrets. I like that she’s direct and works towards her goals and yet would not wish harm on others. In many ways, she’s like the female version of Xiao Huo and that’s why they suit each other perfectly.

    In some of the previous chapters, Xiao Huo was described by Tong Hua in wolf like terms and that suggests at the most primal level, with Yu-er’s upbringing with the wolves, Xiao Huo is really her soul mate, one that she will discover for herself in Volume 2.

    Thank you very much for this translation!

  22. Thank you for faithfully translating every detail of this novel. I don’t understand Chinese so I truly appreciate all your hard work. The depth and layers in each character is fascinating.

  23. I am sorry to say this but dude – The ship has sailed for the 2nd lead… Too bad for him… his fears and insecurities came thru. A pity he could not take a leap of faith for her!

    Yayy baby bring da chase on! HQB fighting 😉

    Thank you Ms K!!!

  24. In DMY, timing is everything.

    Jiu Ye met Jin Yu first by yue ya spring though she actually responded more to HQB. In Chang-an, she was looking forward to meet HQB first, but instead Jiu Ye found her first. I notice some commenters thought that HQB should have looked for her first, like Jiu Ye. But in truth, both men didn’t know that Jin Yu would BE in Chang-an. Well, HQB did suspect she might come, which was why his only regret was he never told her his identity. So that was a lost opportunity on his part and he only has himself to blame that Jin Yu fell for Jiu Ye.

    On the other hand, Jiu Ye only found Jin yu when he recruited Xiao Feng and his grandpa…who had in their possession her Luolan outfit which alerted him of her presence in Chang-an. I’m pretty sure HQB would have sought her out if he knew too. That said, Jiu Ye had his chance first…at the expense of HQB….which is why in vol.1 , HQB seemed more like the second lead. But he fluffed his chance……which sort of awarded HQB with a second chance. And this time, he will make no mistakes!

    And the same might be said about Li Gan too, he missed his chance, though it’s due to Jin Yu. Then again, Li yan’s fixation with revenge means there’s no way they’d be together. In fact, it could have been an even greater tragedy. Imagine if Li Yan really does fall deeply in love with Li Gan, but still chooses the Emporer…it would make her life as a concubine even more miserable than it is pining for another man…

  25. Awsome! ^^
    Thanks! Can’t wait until book 2.
    Now that Yu Er has cut ties with both guys, wonder how they are going to find her? Is she going to meet up with old friend?

  26. Oh my, it keeps getting better and better! Bring on Volume 2, I’m so ready! And thanks, as always, Koala. 😀

    I’m glad Yu Er decided to have a clean break once and for all. And yes, while I feel bad for Jiu Ye, he really was just thinking too much and sadly he now lost his chance with her.

    What I love about Yu Er and how Tong Hua wrote her character is that she is totally independent and in control of her destiny. It would have been so easy to be with the man who offered her a shoulder to cry on and go with HQB to Xi Yu. After all, he made if perfectly clear to her that he cares for her and want her to go with him. But Yu Er didn’t do that and I like that about her. She’s certainly no damsel in distress.

  27. I love this ending! It absolutely rocks! Seeing both of them chase after her, makes you wonder who will reach her first! The eventual meeting between hqb and jy is epic! Super hilarious! Utterly romantic!
    Thank you koala for having this book club. You are utterly amazing!!!!

  28. I was lurking and not really reading.Thank you for doing such speedy translations. I am so well and truly hooked now with the beautiful translations you’ve done. Might even attempt the Audio book links left here. Cannot believe you’ve made me do more Chinese roots stuff than a whole lifetime of my mother’s efforts. HQB has really resonated. with his character. I really want to know how the romance is going to go. So avoiding the spoilers like crazy and thank goodness you’re doing this so fast. It’s a worse feeling than waiting for an episode of a drama.

  29. I’ve also been a silent reader of yours for the past few months. I actually stumbled upon your site when I had just finished watching BBJX and your lovely scene recaps made me a loyal reader.
    I’ve started checking your site for updates several times a day since you started translating DMY. Thank you so much for taking the time to recap such a beautiful story!
    I think this last chapter is the most heart wrenching of the first book. I even started to cry during the epilogue. Also, I LOVED this quote from HQB “I think you’re a masochist, just itching to be mistreated. Yet I’m even worse of a masochist than you, simply dying to be mistreated!” It sums up their relationship so well. 😀
    Thanks again!

  30. Lol. What happened to “I have a new job and won’t post here as much anymore?”
    You know, because translating a novel is sooo not less time-consuming. ^^”

    Anw, MUCH LOVE to you for doing this. I’m so busy to death I have to trade my already non-existant sleep time just to read your recaps. I can’t imagine what you’re sacrificing to share this with us.

    And it’ll only get worse once we go to book 2. Can’t WAIT. RIVETING stuff right there. I haven’t marathoned a book like that since my last georgette heyer.
    All I’ll say about the 2nd book is: Huo. Qu. BLOODY AWESOME. Bing.

    • hi v! i figured i should just reply here so you can see it faster.
      yes, i’m still in contact with some PKers: itadakimasU, J.J., lulybunny, and kittykat 😀
      and no, i’m not chinese. though i wish i can read chinese so i can read all these wonderful TH novels.

      so…he is HQ*bloody awesome*B in book 2, huh?! i’m so excited! i mean, he is already bloody awesome in my book right now… 😉

      • yay! I’m “chatting” with itadakimasu right now. once I get a bit of time, I need to reply to her. J.J. pmed me on soompi recently but didnt get back after that..
        It’s a matter of time before TH’s novels gets translated in english. Most of Jin Yong’s novels are in english, and the greatest chinese books can be found published in english as well (though to be honest, reading chinese books in english takes away 3/4 of the greatness of how it’s written.) and with the internet, fan-translations are increasing day by day. Plus you have subbed dramas to go by. ^^ I know it’s the korean-wave right now, but chinese and japanese goodies can be found everywhere now, and even before kr-ent came to spotlight.
        anw. Haha. I agree HQB is bloody awesome right now. :DDDD But it’s like he’s bloody-awesome-in-training. In Book 2, he’s a master at awesomeness. And not just him. The plot just gets better and more exciting. KYA!
        (*missed you*)

      • just so i dont give you a false impression when I extolled in the last comment, in book 2, HQB is definitely flawed. But then again, who needs a perfect hero when we can have the perfect imperfect hero? kkk.

  31. Thank you so much for translating the novel. I feel Yu Er is so calculative at some point. However, she did it for the person that she loves. On the other hand, Li Yan is scary. She is a gambler. She gambled everything she have for revenge. I dislike her because she manipulated people’s emotion and feelings.

  32. “Time is precious… for a second too late would be a lifetimes’ filled of regret….”

    However *start of my rant because of my love for Jiu Ye*, no matter what people say, I can’t help but feel a bit angry at Jin Yu. I know, I know, I should not be, since I completely understood why she gave up on him… heck, I even got my heart broken with hers, but to think that all it took was for her to let him read those cloths of her feelings for him…. I can’t help but to think, she should have given him more time. Heck, her pain can’t even measure up to the pain that he feel, especially later in the novel! Jiu Ye’s personality is not straightforward like HQB. He’s not the type to show his feelings on the sleeves on his shirt without thinking how much it’ll affect the other. *noble idiot syndrome!* — and thus was my rant…. lol. Don’t hurl stone at me. I don’t hate Jin Yu… I LOVE her just as much as I love HQB and Jiu Ye… it’s just that I’m a bit frustrated at this “fate” that they have. Why does Tong Hua have to make Jiu Ye such a great character and hurt him like this? 🙁

    On the bright side, THANK YOU SO SO SO SO MUCH for your fast translation of the incredibly wonderful and heart wrenching historical romance novel. I can’t believe that you actually did SO MUCH in such a short time. I’m pretty sure I’m not the only person whose life you made so much brighter with each chapter. So, I THANK YOU.

    I definitely have my seatbelt on, ready to dive towards the second volume! Can’t wait! 😀

    • “…. I can’t help but to think, she should have given him more time.”

      He knew she loved him before she dropped off his trinkets and her silent letters to him. She went to him and offered her love, time and time again. Several days to think it over after yet again reaffirming her love for him no matter his condition is enough time.

      “She” should not have to work that hard to win his love.

      • I don’t think anyone can really be blamed for this. It’s true that Jin Yu did confess to him over and over and over again, and Jiu Ye knows about her feelings. But Jiu Ye probably thought that her love was just from a young girl’s infatuation (which he realized that it wasn’t from reading her cloths and immediately acted upon it to get her back) or was built from pity because he probably has this complex about his leg since forever and it was probably kind of hard for him to think that a girl would be willing to choose him over another eligible man.

        *Sigh* Men being too realistic. /personal experience

      • Well, the storytelling does not tell us what “he probably thought”. It tells what he did and said.

        I hope he misses out completely after years of knowing about her unfolding love and adoration for him and then saying “sorry” at the end.

      • I know what you mean, but at the same time, you can apply the same scenerio with HQB. He loved Jinyu… was hurt because of her… but yet he held on. Also, if you want to compare pain, you have to remember that he loved her just as long a time as she had loved Jiu Ye. I’m not saying that she was wrong, but instead was ranting about what could have happened if she had waited. as we can see, perseverance pays off–as proved by HQB, who preservered no matter how much pain she put him through. He eventually earn JinYu’s affection and love.

        Different personalities+Similar obstacles=different outcome

        Don’t misunderstand me, afterall, I do love our OTP together. I just want to rant because of my bias for Jiu Ye, my noble idiot who was a second too late.

      • @daisy, regarding your comment: “you can apply the same scenerio with HQB. He loved Jinyu… was hurt because of her… but yet he held on.”

        Yu Er did held on to Jie Yu for a loooong time and confessed twice, not to mention all the little acts of affection that she showed him throughout those years. I mean, how much more time does he need from her? He already knew that she’s a very straightforward person, when she said she loved him and wants to marry him, he should have known that she meant it. Or at least he could have been honest with her about his situation and allowed her to make a choice. She gave him so many openings to be honest with her. In chapter 15 she even said something like, “what are you afraid of?”

        And I don’t think its fair to compare HQB and Yu Er in terms of how much they are willing to do and persevere for love because its a completely different scenario. HQB already knew early on that Jie Yu was in the picture so he knew what he was getting himself into. It was his choice to pursue her even if she was in love with someone else. Yu Er didn’t have that option because Jie Yu was doing this whole push and pull with her the entire time.

        So yes, as much as I feel sorry for Jie Yu, I wholly support Yu Er’s decision to make a clean break and go away.

  33. Yes, she’s actually waited for Jiu Ye for several years already, and she’s told him time and time again how much she liked him. Playing the music for him, asking him to accept her heart. Even the honesuckle (lover’s vines) took 2 years to grow.

    • I totally agree with you! How much is she supposed to suffer? And it’s not like she left immediately after the awful new year’s event when she experienced a full-blown heartbreak, she DID stay 2 months trying to cope with it all until she just couldn’t anymore. She gave Jiu Ye plenty of time and he rejected her again and again… it’s not like he never gave any hint of changing his mind. I know he did it all for her sake but another reason is probably because he was afraid to get hurt too in the long run… Eitherway, talking about taking the decision out of her hands. That’s not very respectful, it should be HER choice whether to stay with him despite his disability and whatnot. If only he’d properly talked to her *sigh* It’s not like she could read his mind.

      Thanks for the fast translations and congrats on finishing the first volume! The second volume sounds even more awesome, I’m preparing myself for the ride! XD

      • “If only he properly talked to her.”
        I think you bring up a good point here. I feel bad for JY, I really do, but talk about communication fail. He should’ve talked to her more and had a more open/honest relationship rather then thinking…”I know what’s best and I’m doing this for your own good” Good thought but completely ineffective and not good for a healthy functional relationship.

        With HQB on the other hand, whether it through soft words or full out yelling….they communicate. It may be painful/hurtful sometimes but they always know where the

      • yes a heart to heart talk would have been better, anyway that lover’s vine although rejected will bloom again in spring, it would have made her shallow not to open heart again right….in the first place it is not human love that a vine and flowers exist, it also exist for greater purposes….at this point she has her own battles….romance cannot be the only thing she breathes for 😉

  34. i havent opened my laptop in a few days and when i do i have all these amazing chapters to read! THANK YOU SO SO MUCH!! I love reading the mens pov!!

  35. This is such a great book!! Thanks, Koala for translating volume one. I’m looking forward to volume 2. I’ve enjoyed reading your translations and discussing it with the other DMY fans.

    I am THRILLED about JY’s clean break with Jiu Ye. I understand his sadness about not being able to have a family with her, but his underestimation of her feelings for him was terribly dense (purposely?). Perhaps he didn’t want to tie her down with his life & condition…but I wish he had been honest instead of push/pull, hot/cold. Instead we got a noble idiot.

    I am also thrilled that HQB doesn’t give up easily. 😉

  36. I wanted to say THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH!!! for translating the novel…I was google on Hu Ge lastest news and stumble across your blog on his new role in DMY…THANKS to my LUCK and my CURIOSITY on Hu Ge…I get to read the whole first volume of DMY…I’ve been reading its non-stop since last night…I’m so in love with both guys character that I’m having a hard time to pick one over the other…I love the playful, straightforward love HQB has for JY but I can’t resist the tender love MJ has for JY either…I feel the pain within MJ’s heart after reading JY’s dying love she had given him…I can imagine at that moment he knows that he’s losing JY forever…I can just picture how hurt and torn he must has been and how angry he has within himself for not believing in JY’s ability and her love for him…this first volume has brought me from cheers and tears…I can’t wait to read the second volume…once again…thank you, thank you so so much…

  37. ^ my comment got cut off 🙁

    But i was saying….how they always know where the other person stands, theres Jo misundernding and so everytime thy argue thy learn more about each. That’s why in my line they’re the more functional and long lasting pair.

    Captains Koala…..all seatbelt fastened!! Onward to Book 2!!!!

  38. Thanks so much for the recaps!!! I can barely read any chinese tho I speak the language so I’m missing out on all these good stuff! So glad someone finally translates this swoon-worthy novel to English!! Ur doing the world a huge favour!! Think u shld be paid some novelty fr this. :p

    This chapter is when I’m officially on the HQB ship. I was on JY’s ship the whole 15 chapters cus of the deep feelings tht Jin Yu has fr him whilst she only cares fr HQB as a best friend. But when a girl has confessed twice n gets rejected twice!!!, I dun care whts the reason, its time to move on cus he’s just not tht into u! N can I just point out tht I love how HQB knows a good thing when he sees it n he’s gonna make sure he seals the deal…thts my man!! I really love the fact tht he knows Jin Yu likes JY so he respects her decision but once JY lets go, he’s ready to take charge! I swoon!! I’m looking fwd to book 2…sounds delicious already. Let the feast begin! 😀

  39. Unnie – jungmahl khamsahamnida ….
    My heart break so much for Jiu ye – how can we blame him? It says quite clearly there he wants her to have a free life – to be herself – he didn’t even want her to change because that was makes her -her – she is so smart – why didn’t she analyze dat it was becos of his in capabilities dat he couldn’t b with her? Jiu Ye is not selfish at all – if u love someone u wud wanna see them have a better life especially knowing xiao yu has such a bright future ahead of her and she said it so strongly she wanted family – how can Jiu ye selfishly tell her I can’t give u dat – wud u still b with me? He didn’t know at dat time how much she had loved him, we are talking abt an 18year old girl – can an 18 possessed such strong feeling? He didn’t think he deserved it either …
    It even saddened me knowing dat he will lose xiao yu in d end even after he had so determined to find her and won’t let her feel pain anymore ….
    At the sane time I do admire xiao huo’s gentleman in this regard, his love is strong and he is always there for her … I have watched enough drama to see how this will all end …
    Just really wish they won’t turn my Jiu ye into some evil character like some drama – just becos he couldn’t get the girl … Please let him be him till the end ….
    So unnie – no competition from me – u can keep xiao huo 🙂
    Aren’t u glad u hv one less admirer for xiao huo?
    Can’t wait for vol 2!!
    Thks again n please look after yrself n your family … Much love from d land down under 🙂

  40. thank you soooooo much for translating the first novel!!!!!!!!
    I couldn’t stop reading from chapter one and has zoomed to finish reading up until this point (and will continue reading after I finish writing this comment).

    I just had to say that I really love this epilogue.

    From the beginning til chapter 16, while I like her relationship with Meng Jiu, I never see Xiao Yu being with him. I just didn’t see it. I know he loves her in his own way and all but I’m a sucker for Xiao Huo from the moment he made her wrap her arms around him on that horse ride. It was over for me. I was on the HQB ship all the way.

    However, THE EPILOGUE! That description about her being his warmth and how he has to force himself to not speak for it would only ask her to stay…. it CRUSHED me!!!

    Okay first of all, I’m only kind of in this for the love triangle (actually it was more of the love line between Xiao Huo and Xiao Yu). And I personally think that it was Jiu Ye’s fault for underestimating Xiao Yu, thinking she didn’t know what she was getting herself into when she said she wanted to be by his side. Although to his credit, you don’t meet a wolf-raised-turned-to-business-empress-at-18-years-old girl everyday. I can see how anyone would underestimate her.

    BUT, in this epilogue, it also (to me anyway) shows that once he understood the extent of her love for him was willing to use everything at his disposal to get her back by doing things he never would have done before.

    Xiao Huo, on the other hand, has always had life handed to him on a silver platter and has always had the luxury of doing whatever he wants and getting away with it. Additionally while I LOVE that he’s so single-minded towards her, I feel that Jiu Ye probably actually NEEDS her more. Like literally needs her for mind and physical health purposes. Though I really was as frustrated with him as Xiao Yu was…

    SO now that he’s finally doing something about it and searching for her (even though it’s TOO LATE BUDDY!), I finally feel the love triangle. I can maybe root for you now Jiu Ye….. good job!

  41. Thank you Ms K!

    I guess in any relationship it is all about taking that huge leap of faith. All of us have fears, do our fears push us forward or backward? Poor JY… better luck next life 🙂

  42. This was a really good ending to voume 1. So emotional, I teared up as I read the about Jin Yu playing the flute for Meng Jiu; him coughing up blood and sits down to read her notes one by one. So touching. Than about HQB sad one moment then happy the next.

  43. I downloaded the original chinese novel but couldnt find the epilogue part which you translated on this post. Would you please be able to direct me to the epilogue online (whether for viewing or download) in the original chinese? Thanks so much!

  44. Thank you indeed, for this precious translation! I became a big fan of Tong Hua by Bu Bu Jin Xin, but in korea we only have someone’s kind translation of it like yours, and no genuine publishment D: Not good as I am at chinese so I did not have any route to read further her other novels…..and your blog show up! Again, thank you so much 😉

  45. Jiu Ye, WHY. First he’s purposefully cruel and now he changes his mind and he decides to pursue her AFTER he broke her heart?! Ugh.
    This is why I prefer Xiao Huo. “In Huo Qu Bing’s life, there’s nothing he can’t achieve, much less her.” CHILLS.
    I spent the entire day reading Volume 1 and now it’s onto Volume 2. Thank you so much Ms Koala for this <3

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