Da Mo Yao Chapter 38: Carefree and Epilogue: Shadow of Sorrow

I can’t believe this is it. The final chapter of Da Mo Yao, plus the epilogue for volume 2 that ends this entire baby on a really poignant note. Translating DMY didn’t make me love it more or less, only validating that I like it just as much upon a closer read and constantly having to parse the details. I remain a Yu Er-Huo Qu Bing shipper, but I did grow to appreciate Jiu Ye’s character more the second time around. Ultimately DMY is a period romance novel, with politics, war, and ethnic intrigue used so superficially that no one should use it as a substitute for a Han dynasty history lesson. But I liked the limited scope narrative of Yu Er telling her story, and all of us going along for the ride. It was a blast translating this novel, and I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did.

Chapter 38: Carefree

Huo Qu Bing was full speed ahead when it comes to war, but when it comes to seeing Yi Er, he’s constantly worried. He’s always fretting about something going wrong. Every time I ask, he goes through a list of possible dangers lurking. I see he’s overly cautious and even unusually pessimistic, but seeing that he’s just as eager for any information about our son, I control myself from pressuring him so that he can prepare everything.

As we wait and wait, what arrived first was Wei Kang getting into an incident.

According to the scouts, around the Ah Ke Sai area near Xu Fang there are random pockets of lingering Xiong Nu forces. Huo Qu Bing doesn’t want to bother with them since these stragglers can’t even be considered a Xiong Nu army. They are people who escaped from the battlefield or those who have broken army protocol, afraid to return to the Xiong Nu for fear of punishment. He considers them no more than thieves and outlaws, and capturing them is the job of the local law enforcement in the Xi Yu kingdoms. He also doesn’t need or want to be dragged into capturing thieves and outlaws.

Wei Kang doesn’t agree and argues with Huo Qu Bing about it. Everyone in the army feels torn, one is the son of the Great General Wei Qing and is close to the Crown Prince and is even Huo Qu Bing’s cousin; the other is the Biao Qi General Huo Qu Bing who is currently prized by the Emperor. No one, not even Zhao Puo Nu, wants to get involved with this fight between two cousins who could easily make up tomorrow.

Huo Qu Bing endures until finally he loses patience and coldly says “I’m the commander so there is no place for you to second guess me. When you have the ability to lead your own army, then I will listen to your orders.” Wei Kang can’t say anything, he just gives Huo Qu Bing a hateful glare and mutters under his breath”The last name is not Wei, no wonder not aligned with us. My father raised a wolf in the midst.”

Huo Qu Bing glared at Wei Kang and says nothing. I sigh, Wei Kang would already be dead if his last name wasn’t Wei. Suddenly Wei Kang laughs and bows to Huo Qu Bing “General, please excuse me” and then he leaves. His last smile leaves me shaken, I have this really odd feeling.

I thought this matter was over when suddenly we find out Wei Kang disobeyed orders and attacked the Xiong Nu In Ah Ke Sai at night. When Huo Qu Bing finds out it’s already the next day. He’s furious “When Wei Kang returns, I will send his ass packing for Chang An immediately.”

I share a sad smile with Zhao Puo Nu “Only if he comes back alive. The area around Ah Ke Sai is a rocky sharp cliff region created by thousands of years of wind blowing through the deserts. It’s a veritable maze, and at night the winds are like demons howling. The locals call it the Demon Region, and smart thieves try to lure their prey into that area so they are easy targets.”

Huo Qu Bing may be raging but he still have to go save Wei Kang. I want to go but he won’t let me “I’ve been in and out of army bases with tens of thousands of Xiong Nu, you can’t be worried that a few hundred thieves can harm me? I’ll go with Zhao Puo No, there is no one I trust more beside me from this army base. You stay here for me to guard the base.”

He’s firm and has a valid reason so I agree “No matter if you rescue him, you have to get out of there before sundown.” He smiled and nodded. As he got on his horse to leave, he suddenly stared at me and then leaped off the horse and kissed me on the forehead in front of all the soldiers “We’ll see Yi Er very soon.”

“What?” I forget my embarrassment and ask. His horse had already flown forward like the wind and all I see is the trail of dust kicked up by hundreds of soldiers following him.

From morning until noon, from afternoon under dusk, I start to get more and more worried. I pace in circles in the room, until finally I can’t take it anymore and rush out and jump on a horse. Before I set off, I hear horses coming towards the base.

I rush to meet them “Is Wei Kang fine?” Zhao Puo Nu’s face was all white, and behind him was Wei Kang and Ren An, both of whom looked somber and withdrawn. But with Ren An, I can see beneath his somber facade is the same look he had the day Li Gan was killed, Ren An looked secretly pleased.

I take two steps back “Where is Qu Bing?” Zhao Puo Nu lowered his head and soldiers carried a pallet over. Huo Qu Bing laid on the pallet, unconscious and his face completely white. My legs buckle and I almost collapse but Zhao Puo Nu supports me “The General is still alive.”

………………………………………………….

I hold Zhao Puo Nu arms and take a deep breath. I force myself to stand “What happened? What danger is he in?”

Zhao Puo Nu gave me two arrows wrapped in cloth “To save Wei Kang, the General went into the Demon Region and we had a hard time finding the enemy because they knew the area so well. The area was narrow and rocky so we couldn’t form attack formations and had to split up. The General was hit by two arrows during the battle, none are in vital places. But…..the arrows are coated with poison.”

I’m so enraged and scared that the two arrows snap in my hands. I toss the ends arrow but save the tips in the cloth. I saw Wei Kang and Ren An flash expressions of joy quickly masked with disappointment. I tell Zhao Puo Nu “Tell everyone to disperse.” Wei Kang asked if I needed anything, and whether we should set off for Chang An to find better doctors. I glare at him and spit out “I just want you to immediately disappear from my sight. Otherwise I might just destroy you first.”

Wei Kang immediately got mad and rushed me, but Zhao Puo Nu pulled me aside while Ren An restrained Wei Kang and dragged him away. Zhao Puo Nu was normally very calm, but his eyes staring at them was also filled with rage.

“Did Ren An and Wei Kang drag out the battle with the outlaws?” Zhao Puo Nu lowered his head “The area was so dangerous and difficult to navigate, I couldn’t tell, so I dare not say anything.”

As the army doctor examined Qu Bing, I knelt down and held his hand, which was fisted tightly and cold. When I pry open his hand, I see written in his palm with blood is the character for “one” (pronounced Yi). It was blurry, like he used every ounce of his strength to write it. Because I was extra sensitive to the pronunciation of this word, I immediately starting thinking elsewhere.

“Bring some water, the General has blood on his hand.” I wash away the bloody word and think. The army doctor sighs and kneels before me “Miss, you must return to Chang An! The two arrows are two different types of poison. I am useless and can do nothing. I can’t even differentiate the two poisons.”

I tearfully ask “Can you guarantee he’ll survive the few days trip to Chang An? That he won’t die of the poison before we arrive?” His lowered his head even more, and my emotions plummeted along with his head. I held on to an icy cold hand and it became my only source of strength to face this. I must be strong. “You can go now!”

I call out “General Zhao!” “I am here!” “Order the most trustworthy person to go to Chang An and find the best doctor and bring him here. Seal the entire city of Xu Fang, letting no one in or out. Do not let any news of this leak out. You do know what the undefeatable warrior god that is the Biao Qi General Huo Qu Bing is in the hearts and minds of the Xiong Nu and the various Xi Yu kingdoms, right?”

I take Qu Bing’s general’s seal and hand it to him “If anyone tries to enter or leave Xu Fang, execute the person!”

Zhao Puo Nu considered it and then kneeled to accept the general’s seal. He was worried and I tell him “If Wei Kang and Ren An want to cause problems, if you execute Ren An, then Wei Kang won’t try anything else. I won’t use this as an excuse to get rid of Wei Kang.” Zhao Puo Nu was relieved “I understand now.”

“Use the name of the Biao Qi General to ask around all the Xi Yu kingdoms for their best doctors. Just say…………say a woman following the General got food poisoning. But secretly leak news that this woman is the mother of Huo Tan.” “I will!”

‘When the Xi Yu doctors arrive, only allow them to enter, do not allow any of them to leave. Split all the army doctors into two groups, always have one group waiting outside for immediate assistance. This is all I can think of for now.”

Zhao Puo Nu got up to leave when I got down on my knees. He was so startled he wanted to help me up, but when he touched my elbow he was shaking and red-faced. “General Zhao, twice you have helped me. This debt of gratitude Jin Yu will forever remember in my heart.”

He rushed outside and said “You needn’t be this way, I will do my best.”

With him gone, it was just Huo Qu Bing and me in the room. My surface courage shatters and I grab Qu Bing’s hand and bite it, but I don’t have the heart to bite down hard. “Qu Bing, if this is some scheme you cooked up with Jiu Ye, I will not speak to you for an entire year…………how can you scare me like this…………” Before I finish talking my tears are falling “No, I just want you to be safe, I won’t hold this against you………….I won’t be mad, as long as you are safe…………..”

My tears fall on his palm and soon it forms a small puddle that reflects my own white face, which is filled with anguish and pain.

The current influence of the Han dynasty over the Xi Yu kingdoms is unprecedented. Ten years ago a Han merchant will get picked on when passing through Xi Yu. Even Han ambassadors have been detained before. But now, with one word from Huo Qu Bing, all the Xi Yu kingdoms urgently send their best palace physicians and find the best commoner doctors.

With Jiu Ye’s influence in Xi Yu, news will surely reach him immediately. But the first to arrive isn’t Jiu Ye, which confirms even more that the two of them have been plotting this. Because Jiu Ye knows the cover story about me being poisoned is fake, then he doesn’t worry and therefore isn’t in a rush to arrive. This makes their plot even more bulletproof.

At noon on the second day, a wrinkled and bearded old man who is hunched over arrives, using a crutch to help him move. Behind him are his two disciples carrying boxes. Everyone is wearing wide black robes, so it’s impossible to tell their size. The servant bringing them in announce “This is the palace doctor sent from the Yi Nai Kingdom.”

I meet the old man’s eyes and quickly turn around. I tell the servant “Same rules, when the doctor is treating the patient no one is to enter the room.” When the servant leaves, I check to make sure security is tight outside and we are alone before turning around and sitting down next to Qu Bing on the pallet.

Jiu Ye sighed softly and followed me without saying anything.

“What were you two planning? Was that group of outlaws your people in disguise?”

Jiu Ye felt Qu Bing’s pulse and his face lost all color and he started to sweat. The longer he felt the pulse, his expression grew more and more alarmed, until in the end his hand was shaking “Yu Er, what happened? How did Huo Qu Bing have two different kinds of poison in his body.”

When I saw him, I was starting to feel relieved, but now my heart plummets again. I’ve been so wracked with worry for a day and a night that right now I’m feeling dizzy “Didn’t your people shoot him with the poison arrow? Didn’t you two plan all this?”

Jiu Ye removed the bandage on Qu Bing’s arm “The poison on the left arm is mine, but the one on the right is from someone else.”

“I don’t care who shot him with that other poison arrow, I beg you to please cure him.” I take out the two arrow tips and show it to Jiu Ye, who puts it to his nose to sniff. He takes out instruments from his servant and tests the poison. After some time he’s still investigating the poison, but as time passed I grew more and more afraid. I can’t control myself and rudely ask “Aren’t you exceptionally talented with medicine? You must be able to cure this poison, right?”

His servant glared at me and indicated for me to be quiet. I realize what I’m doing and quickly say “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to…………..”

Jiu Ye shook his head “Yu Er, you don’t need to say that. The poison on this arrow is called “Seven Day Suffering”, because it will take seven days to die once afflicted. The manner of death afterwards is like a person contracting an infectious disease. The poison is created by mixing seven different deadly herbs together. And the antidote requires the exact same seven deadly herbs. But when making it, the seven herbs are added in specific order, and the antidote must be cooked in reverse of that order with the same seven herbs.”

Jiu Ye’s voice was somber and my heart was chilled “Can you be sure of the order?”

Jiu Ye’s eyes were filled with sadness and regret “I can’t right now. Most poisons can be cured by finding out the ingredients. The cure for the “Seven Day Suffering” requires that and more, understanding the order it was made, making it very difficult to make an antidote. Because this poison is so vile and deadly, pretty much guaranteeing death, it is against moral law and the formula has been destroyed. I thought this poison had become extinct, who knew it would reappear.”

“What will happen if an antidote with the wrong order is consumed?” Jiu Ye was silent and then said “It will speed up the poison and lessen the days left.”

I put my face in my hands, fill of rage and bitterness. Why? Why did this happen?

‘What was the original plan?” Jiu Ye was curing Huo Qu Bing of the poison Jiu Ye prepared and explained “Huo Qu Bing wanted me to help him leave the Palace. He thought long and hard and the only way out was to pretend he died to the entire world. Otherwise the Emperor will never release him. The Emperor values him so much he’s willing to flout Han law and taint his own legacy to let him get away with killing Li Gan. How could the Emperor agree to let him quit his post and leave? Plus those who oppose him in court also won’t let him off that easily. The ties between him and the Wei family will always remain. But the Wei family is now completely dead to him. He didn’t tell you in advance because he knew you would never allow him to take such a risk, even if he believed it was foul proof.”

Jiu Ye pointed to one of his servants “That is Teng Yin. He was a death row convict facing execution in the prison of the Yi Nai Kingdom. I paid his family a lot of money and he has agreed to let me do as I request of him.” Jiu Ye spoke to him and he took off his black robe “Yu Er, look at his body shape and size.”

“It’s quite similar to Qu Bing, and if he was wearing Qu Bing’s clothes and his face isn’t clear, it’s a good match.”

“My poison will cause a person’s skin to turn completely black after he dies and his facial features will rot. The “Seven Day Suffering” also has the same effect.”

“So you two planned this from the very beginning. From when Qu Bing asked to come to Xu Fang, he has been goading and baiting Wei Kang to use Wei Kang’s impetuous personality to push your scheme forward unwittingly. And he will become the best witness to Qu Bing’s “death”.”

I flash back to all the conflicts with Wei Kang recently and I realize what happened “You two were too smart for your own good. A rabbit pushed to the limit will try to leap on an eagle, much less an arrogant Wei Kang. He unconsciously piggybacked on your plan and created his own assassination attempt.”

I stand up and head out “I’ll get the antidote from Wei Kang.”

“Yu Er!” Jiu Ye stopped me “He will not give it to you. If he did, then he is admitting insubordination and it’s a capital offense. The Emperor is just looking for any opportunity to take out the Wei family and this would be perfect. It can also deepen the rift between Wei Qing and Huo Qu Bing. The Emperor would kill Wei Kang. Since Wei Kang is dead either way, he would rather die than admit the truth. Plus this is a Xi Yu secret poison, he probably doesn’t have any antidote.”

“I don’t believe I can’t torture him enough to get the information.”

“Yu Er, this is an army base, and Wei Kang is still the eldest son of Wei Qing. Half of the soldiers are on his side anyways. If you torture him without any concrete proof, you might cause an insurrection. At which point we don’t have any antidote and we’ll have lost time. We only have six days left as of now.”

My fear, anger, frustration, all boil together and I scream at him “I can’t do this, I can’t do that! So what am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to do?…………….” My tears are falling and in his eyes I see his sadness for me “Huo Qu Bing, in your heart…………..is he…………is he more important than anyone else. Even more important than your own life?”

I turn around to wipe my tears and don’t answer his question.

Jiu Ye says “Yu Er, don’t cry. I promise I’ll return Huo Qu Bing to you. Give me five days to mix the antidote. If after five days I can’t produce the antidote, then whatever you want to do, I will help you.” His voice was unusually calm, so calm it was like a death row inmate calmly walking to his own execution having accepted his fate.

I want to say something but no words come out. He lowered his head and walked outside on his crutch “Inform General Zhao Puo Nu to allow me to enter and exit the army base. Then find me a remote and quiet place where I can mix the antidote. I need absolute concentration to do it. You can’t come bother me. I will come to you when I have the results.”

He was disguised as an old man and was hunched over, but right now I felt like his hunched back was not faking it, but he was genuinely weighed down by what he needed to do.

My heart hurt and right when I’m about to call out “Jiu Ye”, behind me Huo Qu Bing weakly coughed. I quickly turn back around and see that Huo Qu Bing has his brows tightly furrowed as if he’s in great pain. I tenderly rub his forehead, and when I turn back, Jiu Ye has left already.

…………………………………………………..

In my life I have never experienced a more painful five days. Every day when the sun set, I felt like the most precious thing in my life was seeping away little by little. When the sun sets on the seventh day, will my life descend into darkness just like the sun?

When I watch a new sun rise, I feel like there is still some hope. I repeat to myself that Qu Bing promised to protect me and the baby for his entire life. Jiu Ye promised me he will cure Qu Bing. Neither of them will not follow through with their promise.

Every time I walk to Jiu Ye’s room, I don’t dare enter. One time I heard a painful cry from inside the room and right when I’m about to rush in, Jiu Ye’s servant Za Za Er stops me. He says nothing, only using silent and dark eyes to warn me to leave.

I cry out “Jiu Ye, what’s wrong?” Some time later, a weary voice responds “I am using Teng Yin to test the poison and cannot be distracted. When I have news, I will call for you.” I can only turn and leave.

On the night of the fifth night, Za Za Er moves Huo Qu Bing into Jiu Ye’s residence but doesn’t allow me to enter. I call out from outside “Jiu Ye, Jiu Ye, why don’t you let me in? Is the antidote process very painful? No matter what, I want to stay by Qu Bing’s side.”

After some time, I heard from inside Jiu Ye’s voice “Come in!”

Za Za Er moved out of the way and I rushed inside. The moment I walk in I realize the room is pitch black. As I was wondering, suddenly I smell a faint fragrance on my nose. My body collapses on the floor. I never would have expected Jiu Ye to trick me, and when I’m passing out I feel a pair of hands holding me “Jiu Ye, why…….”

I don’t know how long I’ve been unconscious, the moment I wake up I keep thinking “why” and I don’t even know why I’m asking that question. When I suddenly realize the reason, I sit straight up and shout “why”, and I shock Za Za Er with my yelp. He gives me a hate filled baleful glare. I look around and see only a stranger laying next to me. We’re laying side-by-side on the pallet, and our hands are placed on top of each other.

I startle and recognize that it’s Qu Bing! I lightly hold his hand and I can feel the dark energy has left him. His breathing is calm, indicating the poison has been cured. I’m so happy that I don’t even know what to do, I can only stare at Qu Bing.

“Yu Er?” Qu Bing slowly opened his eyes. He looked confused for a moment before reacting “Meng Jiu saved me?” I rush into his arms and my tears start falling. He wipes my tears “The plan got waylaid, I’m sorry.” I continue to cry, unable to say anything.

Za Za Er kept coughing and we’re reminded that someone else is in the room. I get up “Where is Jiu Ye?”

Za Za Er didn’t understand me but got my gist. He had a poker face as he handed Qu Bing a handkerchief. He pointed to Teng Yin laying in the corner. Teng Yin was dressed in the same clothes Qu Bing wore that day, and his face had already turned black and he was giving off the smell of bodily decay.

Qu Bing opened the letter:

Huo Qu Bing

The fate is done, your wish is complete.

The moving clouds are no more than people aging

The yellow sandy desert, each seeking our own carefree

This parting today, no meeting again in sight

After Qu Bing read it, he silently handed it to me. The last words on the handkerchief indicate the brush was pressed down heavily and the ink soaked through. Jiu Ye left without saying goodbye? No meeting again in sight?

He placed Qu Bing and I side-by-side on the pallet, putting our hands together. Was that his final wish for us?

In my daze, I feel like I can still smell him, but I know that is just my sadness conjuring up these sensations. This time, he really has left, he really has completely given up and left! He will never again appear in my life!

Jin Yu, you should be happy. Only by letting go today can he reach out and capture tomorrow’s happiness. Perhaps tomorrow, or the day after tomorrow, or the day after the day after tomorrow….he will find happiness. Without giving up today, how can one get to tomorrow? JIn Yu, you should be happy……………

……………………………………………………..

The doctors from Chang An can do nothing. Initially they don’t believe it’s poison, calling it an infectious disease. I angrily kick out all the doctors from the various Xi Yu kingdoms, and Za Za Er and the shrouded Teng Yin leave along with them.

I just stay in a daze beside Huo Qu Bing, whose body is starting to rot. In the army base, the mood is sorrowful and anxious. With the doctors leaving, news will soon travel through Xi Yu, and then onto Xiong Nu, that Biao Qi General Huo Qu Bing is dying. When the news reaches Chang An, how will it affect the world?

“General Zhao, let’s return to Chang An! Qu Bing would want to see Chang An, that was where he grew up.” No one objected and even Wei Kang was accommodating, everyone rushing back towards Chang An.

At the edge of the world, a red round sun is slowly setting in the West. Before the sun set completely, Huo Qu Bing went to sleep forever, never to awaken. A legendary undefeatable warrior god, he chased the Xiong Nu out of the Desert South region. But right at the peak of his youth, he died at the age of twenty-four, though his name and legend will live on. People will write about his military exploits, and thousands of years later, vestiges of him will still percolate in the He Xi region.

The raging waters from the melted Snow Mountain was rushing through the river like the Milky Way has fallen from the sky and is blanketing the earth. The sound was like millions of horse galloping.

Over a thousand soldiers are kneeled on the ground. Even Ren An and Wei Kang looked genuinely sad. Ren An looked torn and he sighed “The son of the Heavens, a rare talent of an entire generation. A loss for our nation!” He got off his horse and bowed his head on the ground heavily three times, leaving his forehead all bloody.

Zhao Puo Nu saw me holding Huo Qu Bing as if I was a statue. I sat there the entire night and he made sure no one bothered me and he stayed beside me. A sliver of white was creeping up over the East when he finally decided “Ms. Jin, the General is gone. The weather is hot now and we need to hurry back to Chang An. You….you please……….”

I raise my head and my eyes are swimming with tears. One by one it falls, faster and faster. He’s gone. Yes, he’s gone! No meeting again in sight!

I put down Huo Qu Bing and rush to the river. No one has reacted since they are all kneeled on the ground. When Zhao Puo Nu realizes and reaches for me, I take out a dagger and point it at my chest. I back up while shaking my head, indicating for him not to get close.

Zhao Puo Nu was sobbing and crying “Ms, Jin, please don’t do anything foolish.”

“When you get back to Chang An, bow three times to the Emperor for me and say “Since the child has the Emperor to raise him, then Jin Yu doesn’t need to suffer alone on this earth for ten more years.”

As I finished, I stab the dagger in my chest, and with the blood spurting out, by body falls into the rushing river and in moments I’m gone in the currents. I hear from the shore loud screams “Jin……Yu…………..” reverberating in the sky.

………………………………………………..

Huo Qu Bing carried a completely soaked me and climbed in the carriage. He took a cloth to dry my hair “Your eyes are red and swollen, clearly you cried your guts out. Thank heavens for the heavy currents, things could not have gone more perfectly. Wei Kang and them will not suspect at all. You needed to cry a bit was enough, what’s with the dramatic acting?”

I lightly touch the intricate dagger, a gift from Yu Dan all those years ago. By chance it returned to me, almost as if it was meant to help me find my happiness. Yu Dan, I thank you!

“Qu Bing, where are we going?”

“First to Ha Mi to pick up our son, and then we’ll fly as free as the birds. We’ll live as we want. But before that, we need to go find Brother Wolf. He’s getting older, and in a few years some wolves will challenge him. Rather than wait for then, have him resign his position and we can go to Bang Lian Mountains together. The only promise I made in my life was made there. At the Bang Lian Mountains, in front of your Papa’s grave, with Brother Wolf as our witness, I want to marry you and fulfill the promise I made many years ago. Despite being late, but…………”

I laugh and push his hands away “Did you even ask me if I’m willing? Since proposing is a big deal, you’re not even being serious.”

He quickly bowed and asked solemnly “Yu Er, will you marry me?”

I turn my head and smile, refusing to answer him. “Only wishing for one person’s heart, never being apart until our hair is white.” Because of this person beside me, I know I am blessed.

He waited for some time and then asked urgently again. I lightly nod my head and he grabs my hand, his face lighting up into a brilliant smile like the sun.

Outside of the carriage, the land is vast and the sky is unlimited. A red sun is beginning to rise once again.

Epilogue: Shadow of Sorrow

The different orders of mixing the ingredients for the “Seven Day Suffering” is all very hard to differentiate since the results are so similar. Despite it being hard, if there was enough time and he could study Huo Qu Bing’s poison strain and use someone to test the antidote, then he would definitely find the cure,

With seven ingredients, the number of order combinations make five thousand forty different concoctions. Plus if the amounts are varied, then it shoots up to over ten thousand different mixtures. Even if enough test subjects are found to test the poison, but everyone’s body is different and the reaction is different.

With five days, is impossible to find an antidote. Meng Jie bitterly laughed. If it was possible, the “Seven Day Suffering” wouldn’t be deemed a truly hellish poison that was banned in all the Xi Yu kingdoms. His mind flashed the visage of Yu Er crying. He smiled and decided. This will do, this is the only way.

He used his own body to test the poison. Only by feeling it himself could he sense the minute differences and find the antidote. Even if he had to rely on luck as well, it was his only way. Za Za Er and Teng Yin kneeled before him bowing non stop “Shi Nan Tian, if you need to test the poison, please use us instead. Please you cannot test the “Seven Day Suffering” on yourself.”

Meng Jiu calmly said “I have decided. Teng Yin, please prepare and Za Za Er please guard the outside. Don’t let anyone in, especially that girl you saw today.”

Within five days, he tested countless antidotes, so many Teng Yin had lost count. Perhaps Huo Qu Bing’s life wasn’t meant to end now, or perhaps Jiu Ye’s heartfelt wish touched the Heavens, so Meng Jiu hit upon the right antidote. When it happened, he smiled, and Teng Yin felt tears come to his eyes.

All medicine has some poisonous properties, much less poison. The poison plus the antidote, how many did Shi Nan Tian take during the five days? Teng Yin only took a few dozen and still he was in excruciating pain and felt like his insides were being ripped apart. It was worse that the torture he endured in the death row prison. But Shi Nan Tian, this crippled seemingly weak young man, how did he endure it? What kind of soul was hidden in his body?

After taking the antidote, Meng Jiu stood up and took his crutch. He was about to order Za Za Er to get Jin Yu, but then he collapsed on the ground. Teng Yin rushed to help him but Jiu Ye said “I’ll do it.”

Teng Yin was worried but Za Za Er knew Meng Jiu’s personality so pulled Teng Yin aside. Meng Jiu tried many times but he couldn’t stand up. His two legs wouldn’t listen to him. He lifted his robe and looked at his legs. His one healthy leg was completely black from the knee on down. The other shriveled leg, because the blood circulation was bad, was less black. Meng Jiu lightly pressed on his nerves and investigated. All the color in his face disappeared.

Za Za Er has followed by Meng Jiu’s side since he was young, learning medicine from him. He looked at Meng Jiu’s leg, and realized what had happened. Shi Nan Tian’s nerves in his legs have been completely destroyed by him testing the antidote. The healthy leg was now starting to die and shrivel. Despite Shi Nan Tian being able to control the amount tested perfectly, but in the past five days he simply tested too many poison and antidotes.

The residual poison in his body was pushed into his lower body by the new poison being injected. Now there is likely nothing that can be done to save his legs. He wanted to say something to comfort Shi Nan Tian, but when he opened his mouth, he could only cry.

Meng Jiu was originally crestfallen, but when he heard Za Za Er crying, he gave a small smile. He pointed to a chair, indicating for it to be brought over “In five days, the Heavens let me find the antidote. This is probably the price the Heavens wants in exchange. Have Yu Er bring General Huo here! But keep her outside, don’t let her in.”

Za Za Er was enraged. Who was that woman? How much did Shi Nan Tian do for her? How much did he sacrifice for her? Even now, he doesn’t want her to know. But he dare not oppose Jiu Ye’s orders so he suppressed his rage and sadness and went to get that woman.

Meng Jiu heard Yu Er calling from outside asking to be let in. He knew that he couldn’t prevent her much longer. He decided to let her in. But when he’s treating Huo Qu Bing, she’ll see his sad state and ask what happened to his legs.

He ordered Teng Yin to extinguish the lamps, and when Yu Er walked in, he released a fainting smoke bomb.

It was the dead of night by the time all the poison was cleared from Huo Qu Bing’s body. An exhausted Meng Jiu silently stared at Yu Er and Huo Qu Bing sleeping side-by-side on the pallet.

A wind drifted in the window and extinguished the lamp. But it wasn’t dark out, the moonlight shone in through the window and happened to land on Yu Er’s face, turning her skin as translucent as jade.

So close, so close that he can reach out and touch her.

But so far. So far that she will never know how close they once were, and how far they will be for the rest of this lifetime.

Their first meeting, the girl in the raggedy clothing, the girl who laughed out loud.

Their reunion in Chang An, the thoughtful and cheerful girl who always tried to take care of him.

She admired the moon on the roof, he played the flute in the courtyard.

She visited in the night, but stood outside his window and didn’t dare come in.

She learned the flute for him, she placed her entire heart in “The Song of the Yue Person”.

From Fall until Spring, from Spring until Winter, she planted the Lover’s Vines. She planted her heart, she planted her love for him.

That day, the drops of blood on the flute, her heartbreak, he thought it would be one moment of pain in his life. Who knew it would become a lifetime’s pain for him……………

Everything seems like it was just yesterday. When she broke the flute and turned and walked out of his life, it was still stepping on the pain in his heart……………….

In front of the Lover’s Vine, he cruelly pulled his sleeve out of her hands little by little. Meng Xi Mo, how could you have been so cruel to her back then? How could you have been so cruel to yourself? Why couldn’t you let yourself live freely for once?

……………

…………..

If the first time he heard her play a song for him, he said “It was lovely.”

If he didn’t avert his eyes every time she looked at him.

If he didn’t pull his sleeve out of her hands.

If he opened his mouth to explain the moment she leaped on the roof.

If every word she said when he was sick and she was holding him was true…….

If……if……sadly life has no ifs.

He didn’t know how long he stared at her, and only when the room got darker did he snap out of it.

The moon was falling and it was the final bit of darkness before dawn.

A new day is starting, but he will be leaving her life forever.

Huo Qu Bing and she are suited for each other. He can accompany her as she travels the world, ride over thousands of miles, climb the highest mountain, swim the fastest rivers……..

And himself…………

Meng Jiu looked down at his own legs. From now on, he will have to rely on a wheelchair forever.

One handkerchief contains all his longing. He raised the pen and put it down repeatedly. In the end he could not write the characters “Yu Er.”

He could not say goodbye to her forever. He can only use “Huo Qu Bing” to start the letter.

The moment Yu Er enters the city of Ha Mi, she will see a doctor’s clinic sign with the gold sandy desert as the backdrop and the blue verdant shape of the Yue Ya Spring. She will know immediately where to go to pick up Yi Er.

That day when he chanced to encounter then at the Yue Ya Spring, he was peeved that Huo Qu Bing chose to refer to them as “a married couple”, so he wanted to see Huo Qu Bing’s expression when Yu Er saw the sign. But now he regretted it. Now he would rather Yu Er never once think about him.

When he wrote “No meeting again in sight”, he had a strange smile on his face. But underneath the smile was a heart that shattererd.

Yu Er, this is the last thing I can do for you. With your personality, if you knew my legs were destroyed forever trying to save Huo Qu Bing, you would never be at ease going with Huo Qu Bing to live your carefee existence. I want to see the you who is flying, and not the you who is tied to me because of guilt.

The first rays of the morning light hit the room and shine its golden light on the two people laying on the pallet. Meng Jue smiled, their world belongs in the sunlight.

Meng Jiu picked up Yu Er’s hand, and after hesitating for a moment, he bent down and kissed her firmly on the lips.

Yu Er, forgive me, forgive my overstepping my bounds this once………..

Her lips was just like he imagined, sweet, warm, fragrant. But he couldn’t have imagined the degree of pain he was feeling, it was pain that seeped into his bones. The tenderness between their lips, the touch of their lips, it was branded on him based on hopelessness……

After some time, he raised his head. He put her hand on Huo Qu Bing’s hand and turned to leave. He wheeled himself out.

No meeting again in sight!

…………and then Jiu Ye began to hum the love song of the plains telling of the love story between Ba Ya Er and Yi Zhu.

……………………………………….

The person on the pallet is not yet awake. This time she did not see his figure leaving, and he also did not look back.

He slowly rode alone on his Snow Mountain Camel. Such a camel can fly like the wind, but because of his legs, the camel would have to endure the slow pace from now on.

But right now, he wanted the camel to go slower, even slower, as slow as possible, but the camel still took him further and further away from her.

The blue sky went on for miles, the green grass appeared to connect to the sky, the bright sun was shining down. The white sheep herd, the black horse pack, it was like fallen pearls littering the grassing plains.

A healthy herder was tending to his flock, a beautiful girl was singing a herding song. Her voice rang out in joy, the song of Ba Ya Er and Yi Zhu.

Jiu Ye couldn’t help but stop his camel and listen. In this lifetime, happiness was once so close to him, but he missed it.

His heart was like knives cutting it, the pain caused him to start coughing violently. It was some time before he could straighten himself. He tasted an acrid sweetness in his mouth, and when he looked down he saw the snow white camel had a few drops of dark blood on it. It normally should be red blood, but it was tinged with blackness. He glanced at it and then reached out his hand to wipe it off the camel.

The wind of the plains breezed past him, carrying fallen petals in its midst. After it passed, there was only a lonely shadow on the ground that kept him company.

The stunning red beauty of the sunrise had passed and now the sky was blue tinged with white clouds. His heart came to a realization, and he patted the camel for it to move faster. He took out his flute and played the tune to accompany the herding girl’s song.

The rainbow after the rain, the sunrise on the edge of the ocean, the first Spring flowers, most of the beauty in this world can never be owned. It is enough to have experienced beauty.

The clear tune of the flute mixed with the herding girl’s song and the sound drifted to the sky. The pain in Meng Jiu’s eyes remained, but he had a slight smile.

The emotion was deep, but their fate was shallow. But………no regrets…….only longing.

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Comments

Da Mo Yao Chapter 38: Carefree and Epilogue: Shadow of Sorrow — 164 Comments

  1. This chapter was so sad! I found it so beautiful that TH decided to end DMY with such a memorable JY scene that made my heart hurt, and left such a deep impression, that although YE and HQB are together, and I do love them together, JY’s love for YE will forever be imprinted on my heart! What a great love story and ride this was, and I’m glad to have experienced it with so many wonderful people!

    Koala, thank you for translating the entirety of this wonderful novel! I’m so sad that there’s no more DMY to look forward to, 🙁 but, I will now go read YZG!

  2. It’s four o clock over here in New York. I will write a longer more indepth response of my feelings later. I just have to say thanks to Koala because she is awesome and translated all of Da Mo Yao.

    As much as I love Huo Qu Bing and Yu er. My heart goes to Jiu Ye. I just love thins dude to pieces. I want him to be happy completely. I actually cried at the epilogue. Meng Jiu, how I long to see/read about you again. Does he appear in YZG?

  3. Thank you so much for allowing us to experience DMY. I hate the empty feeling whenever I finish a series; the more wonderous a series, the more hollow I feel when I close the last book.

    Sigh. Jiu Ye. To end the book with such a sorrowful, poignant epilogue. The author is a genius!

    I have been a Yu Er x  Ho Qu Bing ‘shipper. Maybe because their dynamics simply crackle with romance and tension. Or maybe because it’s the less painful easier option.

    Thank you once again, Your Koala Highness!

  4. Oh dear lord, why?! Why?! My head hurts, my heart hurts. The epilogue is just too sad. Not even bittersweet, just sad. 🙁

    While I can still type and not cry myself to sleep, since you asked Koala, here are my thoughts:
    – DMY created a very enchanting and magical world for me, something that is so different from my everyday reality and for that I am grateful. I read each chapter and I’m transported into desserts and courts and I forget about my own troubles for awhile.
    – I am in awe of the all-encompassing love between HQB and Yu Er. And Jui Ye’s love for Yu Er is just….I have no words for it.
    – I guess that would probably be my complaint too, the fact that Jui Ye just had to give up so much…suffer too much. I don’t know, I loved the epilogue but at the same time, I probably would have preferred that it was written differently. Or I would have preferred to have kept in the dark on what happened to Jui Ye and just imagine that he is at least living peacefully somewhere, practicing medicine. But as it is, I will always be haunted by the image of him singing sadly on his wheelchair, knowing that he will never see Yu Er again..*tears*…goshdarn, why?!!
    – Overall, I really enjoyed reading this novel. Thank you so much, Koala for all your hard work! 🙂

    P.S. If somehow we’ll meet in the future, I’m definitely buying you a drink. Cheers! Kanpai!

  5. wow. this story is so beautiful. it keep me going until the last moment.

    let see…to me, Huo Qu Bing and Yu Er were the main characters in the first book. but as the story progressed into the second book, I felt like Jiu Ye was the main character. I really love Qu Bing and Yu Er as a couple but this ending of Jiu Ye was way too harsh..but neverthelast, it did leave a strong impression of him in my mind while Qu Bind and Yu Er did not in the end. They were more prominent in the beginning…. interestingly written indeed.

    anyway, I LOVE THIS!

    Thx for translating and will forever support ur blog (= ….and Qu Bing! HAHA

  6. MsKoala……
    how right you are when you said that I would need a box of tissue when reading the last chapter… How bitter sweet it was.. Meng Jiu love for Yu Er..
    I can’t tell you how thankful I’m for your translation.. Such a beautiful love story… that I can’t wait to see unfold in the drama.
    Thanks so much for your hard work..

  7. Thank you for bringing us readers on an epic journey with your translations. And thank you, for introducing me to TongHua the writer and re-opening the door to chinese contemporary literature for the internet generation for me.

    Your translations introduced me to DMY and spurred me into reading my first chinese novel in YEARS. My first time going through the novel was filled with exhilaration, swooning with probably most of the female population with the forthright and cheeky HQB… MJ was to me such a wishywashy character in the first novel and whilst the pity for him grew as the second volume wore on and hit its penultimate in the epilogue, I never really felt that sorry for him as it was his own doing. But reading DMY a second time through your translations, I came to feel for this self-sacrificing man. How big and deep did his love for JY have to be for him to make such sacrifices?

    It’s also his almost love story with JY that made me ship MengJue and YunGe so so much in the first volume of YZG. But MJ is such a saintly character it just seems unreal, too perfect, too pristine. Even if the male protagonists in TH’s novels cannot really be compared, I feel more pain for MengJue than MJ simply because MengJue seems more real? I don’t know how to put it in words exactly, but with MJ, you feel sorry for him in the end, whilst with MengJue, the ache goes way deeper because he’s such a complex character than every decision, every beat, every nuance of his actions are so well thought out and fleshed out, that when his end comes (and by that not the end as in “death”, but the slow painful one of the end of his ‘fate’ with YunGe), it’s gut-wrenching.

    DMY may have a happy ending, and it was a really exhilarating ride. But after reading YZG, it really feels so simplistic in scope and depth. I still love my HQB and JY to bits, and I will remember the happy times, but YZG, dayummm, it’s imprinted in my heart and MengJue, ahhh my MengJue… I pray to the high heavens the drama adaptation will be decent. I was iffy abt the DMY casting fiasco at first but have since learnt to live and let live. But YZG… I don’t think I even want to see it make it to screen? Because nobody can be MengJue. Nobody.

    Whilst alot of fandom does want to see a novel or at least some story based on Third Brother’s exploits, what I really want is to read about Second Brother, Huo Yi. I think you mentioned somewhere whilst Third resembles Huo most, Second has some MJ personality touches. Plus all the mysterious long journeys he seems to go on according to YunGe, I should think that’s plenty of story fodder. Does he know his blood debt to MJ and did he ever seek out MJ on all his travels? Why he’s not married yet despite being so much older than YunGe and if his similarities to MJ ever extend to that?

    That said, TH has really painted a world so richly detailed amidst all the history as impetus and embellishment that she could really do a whole collection of short stories just based on several characters. DMY sets the stage for YZG.. and YZG, I certainly hope it’s not the end. I don’t know how it would work as a prequel to DMY based on the rumours based off the title and I don’t know Chinese history well enough to spin little tale sin my head….but i’d be loathe to think that the third book in the series will never come out because as you said, TH seems to have moved on to other timeframes…

    Which other TH novel would you recommend starting on (I’m assuming you’d have gone through her entire arsenal here…) to cure our DMY/YZG withdrawal symptoms… Or any other contemporaries of TH that you think are worth picking up?

    Again, thank you koala-unnie. you’re amazing and I wish I had your abilities to bend the space-time conundrum . I don’t know how you manage it, but you’re doing something right here, and the goodness that comes out of it, i’m eternally grateful. =) i love this playground.

    • Jessie, like you, I also wanna know more about second brother. As for your question whether he knew his blood debt to MJ etc, I think he did and he was still seeing MJ from time to time (read the chapter in YZG 3rd volume when Meng Jue taught YG medicine and discussed with her about his adoptive father etc.) . Also, I think MJ gave the Sky Moutain Snow camel to second brother and second brother gave it to YG. Thats how Meng Jue found out about YG ie the same little girl he met years ago…

      • ooh thank you for that snippet.. i’m in the midst of volume two of YZG right now and real-life is impeding my reading progress severely, sadly. i love how everyone here is so involved in commenting with some very lucid input many a time. which is another reason why i love this blog and its eloquent writer and corresponding readership.. cos there are some interesting views and opinions here that make discussing dramas/books fascinating.

        i just read this little essay TH wrote on her blog which detailed some girl travelling back in time after reading DMY and wanting to see how MJ lives after leaving HQB and JY. and Second Brother made an appearance there and it really piqued my interest. blog(DOT)sina(DOT)com.cn/s/blog_4aeb085a0100xqxg(DOT)html
        the story itself is kinda fan-fiction-ish in the mish-mash of genres. but ah. i’m curious about MengJue’s days growing up. AND Second Brother of course.

      • jessie, thanks for link…didnt know abt it…and it was really good. Huo Yi…. =D

    • Hey, not Koala but I’d recommend 烈火如歌 by 明小溪. While reading YZG, I kept thinking of 烈火如歌. It’s been years since I last read the book but I remember thinking it was beautifully written and now that I’m done with YZG, tempted to take it out of my bookshelf to go through the story once again (:

      • thank you!! i’ll place it on my to-read list. side-note: I tried checking out FWSC’s 来不及说我爱你 cos there’s a drama alr out (and if i get lazy reading the chinese, there will always be visuals aiding me along) and i’m getting shudders just reading the synopsis even if I’ve heard ravings about it in some quarters.

        and the only reason why i checked that out FWSC in the first place is cos of 寂寞空庭春欲晚 and ive been hearing rumours that my current c-actor crush YuanHong is gonna be featuring in it. have you read any of her books? I don’t know about the rest but 来不及说我爱你 just reminds me of those very old, very “nue” c-dramas with long-suffering leading ladies of the qiong yao days, when i was just a kid watching whatever mommy was watching. is that indicative of the rest of her work? ><

        ps.are you the same sparkskey on the soulsrebel site? i used to follow the transcaps for ojakgyo religiously every weekend!

    • You may want to try TH’s contemporary 被时光掩埋的秘密. It is another love triangle story so I got a bit tired after reading abt the same triangle for the FOURTH time, n helped alleviated withdrawal symptoms. There r also character similarities between the male leads n Ling GG, Meng Jue, HQB n Jiu Ye so despite it’s shortness, the characters still leave bit of impact.

    • I’m currently attempting to translate 来不及说我爱你 by FWSC. I don’t find her a ‘long-suffering’ heroine in the book at all. She tried to resist the budding romance between her and Murong Feng but she decides to risk everything for love. However, when she’s betrayed, Jing Wan doesn’t stay around pining for him to return to her but she leaves him for a new life. I think she’s a very strong character and rather modern in her outlook in life. If anything, I find the story similar to BBJX where the girl has a relationship with Guy A, falls in love with B but ultimately ends up with C.
      I find Tong Hua’s writing style much more beautiful than FWSC’s, but if you are interested in reading it in English, you can find it here: http://xia0yuer.tumblr.com/

    • Nope I haven’t read FWSC’s books before. Looked through the synopsis and I don’t think I want to read anything so “nue” anymore after just finishing YZG.

      I tend to have a really bad habit of reading every single book an author has published once I like an author so I’m still searching for my next Tonghua fix. I’ve read almost all of 明小溪’s books and among which 泡沫之夏 and 会有天使替我爱你 have been turned into dramas too. So you can check those out if you need visual guide though I heard the drama adaptations were horrible. Korean writer 可爱淘’s books aren’t too bad either, but mainly mindless entertainment. The ones that stood out will be 局外人 and 哆来咪发唆. 局外人 breaks my heart every single time. These are the two authors I’m most familiar with so I’m afraid that’s all I can recommend as well. ): I’ll definitely be trying to read more chinese books this year though now that I’ve graduated and all.

      And yes, I’m the same sparkskey on soulsrebel. Ahh, the days of ojakkyo. Good times, good times

  8. Thank you very much Ms Koala, was a great ride. Love the novel. My heart went with Meng Jiu, love him to pieces, I don’t know why I always feel like this for the second leads, is like my heart wants to just hug him and never let him go T_T.
    I would like to read a little bit more about him, maybe about his life without Yu Er in. If he is happy or if he find some kind of love???, I know that he adopt a child, but nothing else (sigh).
    Thank you again for giving us this wonderful gift. ^^

  9. Thank you Koala unni for translating DMY.
    Finally it has finished. I have to say I really love it. The epilogue is really heart shattering. T.T
    Tonghua is really brilliant. If it only ended in the last chapter then we would get the usual happy ending like what we get in other novel. But the epilogue makes it really memorable. It brings us back to the first volume and all those what ifs…..chances that are passed.

  10. Thank you for sharing this wonderful story with us. I enjoy reading romance novels, but it took a back seat to all the KDrama, JDrama and TDrama and now the novels that you are translating for us. DMY is over, but at least there’s YZG to continue on not to mention your Drama recaps. Can’t wait for what you have in store for us. Much Mahalo and Aloha!

  11. Oh, last chapter!!!!
    Koala-jie, thanks for translating DMY.
    I’ve been enjoying your translations from chapter 1 and I love DMY.
    Same with you, I’m shipping Yu Er- HQB, and I’m glad that both of them can live outside the palace without politics, and can reunite with their son.
    About Jiu Ye, I honestly wish that he gets a happier end, something to reward all the kindness he has done for Yu Er.
    Anyway, your DMY translation is such a treat for me, and hopefully you will keep up your writing in your blog with more translations.
    Cheers 🙂

  12. OMG JIU YE…:'( I know I’m thinking too far ahead, but I think our hearts are all going to shatter with hu ge as jy, especially at this part…

  13. Ouch. What a truly bittersweet ending… But I think it also aptly summarises the tone of this novel – tinged with both beautifully sweet scenes and heart-wrenching intensity.

    Thank you Koala unni for this beautiful translation. I am truly in awe of your prowess, speed and immense dedication. I’m sure it wasn’t easy to translate an entire novel, much less doing so in tandem with your job and taking care of your family. This is my first C-novel ever because I can’t read Chinese, so it’s all thanks to you that I get to appreciate this gorgeous story. Thank you sooooo much for bringing this to us!! <3

    Now for a complete re-read! 🙂

  14. I really love HQB, but this ending just makes me too sad for MJ. Now I wish that MJ had accepted YE’s love then he wouldn’t be in such a painful state as today. But then again, if MJ and YE are together, what would happen to HQB? Would he be in the same state as MJ now? Or would he have to take a second choice and marry the princess like everyone wants?

  15. Thank’s Ms. K, I’ve been a lurker and hardly comments but, I just had to thank you and get this out…. T_T Jui Ye tore my heart out and broke it to a 10000000xxxx pieces with what he sacrificed for Yu Er… I love HQB and Yu Er but I can’t help but fell for Jui Ye…thanks again Koala … ^_^

  16. oh my god! I am a crying blubbering mess right now. I did not expect to be feeling this way upon reading this chapter. I will be back to write a coherent reflection of my DMY experience, once I have recovered.

    For now, all I can manage is a huge thank you from the bottom of my heart Ms. Koala.

    I will now cry myself to sleep.

  17. Oh my goodness!!!!!! I cant believe how heartwrenching it is for Jiu Ye…..I mean im happy and all for HQB and YE being together… But its just so incredibly sad for JY… Although Hu ge isnt HQB, i believe that with the nuances of emotion that he could and should inject into the character of JY, it will make it all worth watching.. he’s the star at the very end… Im going to watch the drama adaptation because of this chapter… I really want to thank Ms Koala… for your hard work in translating the novel as well as YZG. Its my first time reading a chinese novel and i got so interested in it that i went to read some parts of it online already.. and YZG, im on volume 2 the chapter 上元灯会…. its been heart-twisting n heartrenching already… i cant imagine the rest of the novel…. Ms Koala, why dont you consider watching the drama just for Jiu Ye/ Hu ge…….

  18. Thank you so much for translating this beautiful story for us. I’ve enjoyed reading your translations since the very beginning. 😀

    Jiu Ye’s ending is so sad, but surprisingly I didn’t cry at all when I was reading it. Perhaps it’s because he did find some happiness in granting Jin Yu and HQB theirs. Ultimately, this story is all about timing and Jiu Ye just missed his chance with Yu Er.

  19. Sorry i think my previous post seemed to be a little incohorent… i am a bit incohorent now and my heart is just breaking into bits for JY…. I never expected that i would come to feel so much for JY…. eventhough i really like the HQB-YE pairing but JY is just so………….

  20. First of all thank you for introducing us to DMY and bringing us all for the ride with its up and down. I saw the summary you posted of it and my interest was piqued enough that I went and got the books.

    The beginning of the story was interesting enough that I didn’t stopped reading. And when YE got to Chang An the story just got better and better and I ended up reading it through the weekend.

    Just wondering if you have other Chinese novels to recommend. After DMY, I’ve looked up and read a bunch of novels originating from JJWXC. Some were crap, some were group but nothing tugged me like DMY.

  21. oh my heart is breaking for JY… How sad for him and the ending actually revealed the depth of his love for YE! Thought I must say no sane normal person will ever go to such length/sacrifice for one’s soulmate… What do you think?

    Thank you Ms K! You are a superwoman 😉
    Have a great trip in HK. I lurve HK! Eat loads of HK food for me and do not forget to shop…

  22. so painful …..ahh meng jiu.i was not able to read th epilogue my eyes were blurry with tears..yes he brought it on himself but yu er also had to go through many things as she tried to help him in the starting..it was like these people and their story were real asid Qui bing. Still whan i reached the end it didn’t feel like the end.
    THANK YOU FOR TRANSLATING THIS NOVEL.I dont think a thank you is enough but still its from heart so u will understand it..

    I think after few days am gonna read it again….
    I loved all of the main charcters.li yan to liked her the senery’s and the flowes all of it loved em all.

  23. With hu ge as jiu ye, I had wished that they had more happy moments together. Jiu ye’s self sacrificial love was really touching!! And I love how the story comes to a complete closure. Thank you so much for all your effort in translating!

  24. finally, it comes to an end for DMY
    Thank you so much for your translation Ms. K.. ^^/
    really appreciated

    feel happy for HQB & Yu Er but poor Jiu Ye~till the end he still can’t get over his feeling towards Yu er

  25. OMG…this is so sad….T_T
    it was absolutely gut-wrenching to read the depth of Jiu Ye’s regret and pain, and all the things he would suffer for Yu Er. She truly is blessed. And yet….i feel so much grief for Jiu Ye. Not only did he loose the love of a lifetime, but also the legs he tried to save and strengthen all his life. And now…he has to live with both losses. Uuurrghhh….just gut me, whydontcha? It would be less painful.

    And i’m sad too that this lovely novel has come to an end. Thank you so much for the trans, koala~chan. As i’ve mentioned in earlier that its been a long while since i’ve chance upon a romance novel that captures my attention. It truly was a feast for our imagination, heart and soul. It doesnt matter which OTP you ship, each pairing is just as intriguing and as heartbreaking as the other. (which leads to my personal rant on why cant Yu Er marry the both of them?? That would have been perfect!! And no one loses anything. But only in my dreams ^^) I am loathe to part with the whole DMY gang!

    Incidentally, will Yu Er, HQB and Jiu Ye show up in YZG? honestly, the reason i’m following YZG is so that i could read about them again….or hope they will turn up in it. But so far, only Qu Bing turned up…but without Yu Er…and there was mention of Jiu Ye but nothing insightful bout how he’s getting on. sigh….i’m just absolutely obsessed with these 3.

  26. Thank you sooooooooooooooooo much for translating DMY!!!! I’ve become a crazy addict to this book.. Before I would check out koalasplayground once in a while, but DMY made me reload this page 3 times daily for weeks! It was so good!

  27. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for translating and sharing this beautiful and heartfelt novel. I hope you continue to translate and share other novels you find worthy.

  28. Thank you for your hard work translating the whole book. I tried translating a chapter n took nearly 4hrs, so really THANK YOU, n well done!
    I hated the epilogue n wish the drama would show the treatment in sequence so that the ending would end on a happy note. As it is, we can only share Jiu Ye’s pain n regrets. To quote Yu Er, the heavens were really unfair to him – why did he has to remember Yu Er ‘promises’ when he was delirious with fever? Can’t he even be spared that? The soul beneath his crippled body? It must be the most beautiful n loving soul on earth. I don’t find him too perfect because of his insecurities. Quote: HQB can climb mountains with her while his legs… – how real this insecurity is from the day he realized Yu Er liked him? I could go on n on, but I’ll end with thanks to the author, our hardworking blogmaster, for bringing us a fabulous desert tale.

  29. Thanks a million Koala unnie!
    I donno how u did it with so many things to do but I can’t thank you enough for introducing me to novel !
    I am not much of a reader but boy – you have changed me.
    Although I know HQB loves JY very much and vice Verva but I find myself angry at them.
    I know it’s none of their fault but MJ is …. Sigh … In the name of love …
    I felt the pain with him which was why I was a little enraged!
    I was planning to watch the drama but I don’t know if I will now unless they have a different ending … To have to watch MJ sacrifice that much again will just kill me …
    It’s enough for me to read of his pain …
    I know I am going back to the mid-story but I couldn’t really believe for someone dat loved MJ that much would have changed so quickly…
    I donno – maybe I am not thinking straight now … Too painful – too sad – so unfair ….
    I maybe the only one having this feeling but ….
    Nevertheless it has been a wonderful journey – Thks again ….
    Ganbatte !! Aja Aja fighting !!

  30. dear koala,
    bon voyage, have a wonderful trip and thank you for translating this.

    no wonder Jiu Ye said she will know how to find him when she reaches the place….. sob sob sob. he remembered what she said when he was delirious….my poor Jiu Ye.

    i think jiu ye is typical of those long suffering qiong yao characters…where if you ask them to be happy, they cannot if they know they cannot bring perfection to the table. and they just shine brightly when you require someone to do a major sacrifice…. =(

    i really hope TH finishes her part 3 of the trilogy…because after reading DMY and YZG, a reader will be at almost empty emotion wise, and will need something really really wonderfully happy to go back up. (assuming it is a happy story…because if it is not, for the sake of my mental health, i will not read it)

  31. Thanks so much, Ms Koala. I haven’t read the chapter yet but I know it’ll be good and judging from YZG, I think that HQB and JY will feign their deaths, disappear and live happily ever after. Which of course, is what we all want for them. Many thanks for your hard work!

  32. Thank you so very much, Ms Koala, for taking on such a huge project and translating this entire novel for all of us! You’re wonderful! 🙂

    I’m glad that Yu Er and HQB got their happy ending but I feel really sorry for Meng Jiu. The epilogue is so sad 🙁

    Have a great flight and I hope you enjoy your trip! Thanks for sharing DMY with us! 😀

  33. Although this is a seemingly happy ending, Jiu Ye’s pitiful end was just too much for me to handle. Like everyone said, his only mistake was for pushing Jin Yu away…it wasn’t even out of selfish reasons, and his punishment for it was just much too grave. I must say that although Jiu Ye is not the lead male character, his character resonated with me a bit better than Qu Bing even though I am a Qu Bing and Jin Yu shipper. The epilogue is just too heart wrenching to read. All i can possibly say is that munificent Jiu Ye will always be remembered in my heart as someone who never acted out selfishly and always hoped for happiness for the person he love.

  34. [warning: I’m forever Jiu-Ye biased, so some comment might offend those who don’t love him]

    You were wrong, Ms. Koala, when you gave the advice another reader to buy a box of tissues for this chapter. I needed more than one box of tissue!!!! I cried a litre of tear, and it wasn’t funny. In fact, each time I think of Jiu Ye, it’s like a water fountain had been triggered and tears started falling.

    [start of JiuYe-Biased Rant] As much as I love the OTP, what had become the most memorable—and what I will remember most—from this novel is Meng Xi Mo… my Jiu Ye. Jiu Ye’s sacrifice, his thoughtfulness, his selflessness, and his love for Jin Yu will always remain in me. I honestly don’t think that I would have loved this novel as much as I do, had there been no Jiu Ye. I hate to admit this, but I would have loved HQB had it not been for Jiu Ye. HQB has all the qualities that I want in a man and is the PERFECT male lead—in fact, I can even argue that he is better than MOST of the male leads that I have read or seen. However, Jiu Ye just outshine him, for me (and that is my opinion, so feel free to disagree). Jiu Ye made this story stand out among the rest that I had read. Despite knowing he wasn’t the fated OTP from the beginning of the novel, I still placed him into my heart and invested all my love with this novel to him. Just like I said in the comment post for chapter 38, I couldn’t imagine anything worse that could happen to him… but here he goes, making one of the biggest sacrifice in his life for her. He’s such a tragic character. Heck, when I think of the tragic fate that both he and Meng Jue had and will lead with the women they had loved, I can’t help but feel my stomach churn into knots. I can never express enough how much I love that guy. JIU YE BIASED FOREVER!!! From now on, whenever I will read about another novel, I will always compare every male lead to Meng Jiu… even Meng Jue, who’s life (according to the spoiler you gave) is probably gonna be worse off then Meng Jiu.

    On the other hand, I’m happy that HQB got better. It’s too bad that we won’t experience the family reunion intimately. It was a scene I would have loved to read about. With my Jiu Ye biased, I should have been mad JinYu and hate them for not ever knowing the sacrifice and pain Meng Jiu went through, but because I know they’re gonna be leading happy and great life together just like how my Jiu Ye wishes them to be (not forgetting that I do love our OTP and their moments too!), I loved that they got together.

    Overall, I just love this novel. I will definitely read it over a lot more times in the future. I do want to thank you (and I can’t thank you enough), Ms. Koala, for translating and sharing this wonderful novel with us. Just like you, I had a small fear that you were going to drop this project halfway through, like the many translated project I have seen before (BBJX, MoonSun, etc), but you didn’t. With this novel, you allowed me to leave this stressful and depressing reality to go on a wonderful journey with JinYu, Meng Jiu, and HQB. In other word, you were my oasis in my reality desert. So, yes, THANK YOU and last of all, just almost as much as I love Jiu Ye, I LOVE YOU too! 😀

  35. Can someone explain what happened to their son? Were they able to get him back? How come in yzg only the second and third brothers were mentioned? 🙁

    Thank you very much for this ms. koala!

    • The second brother is Huo Yi。 Their first brother is the brother who was sent to the palace, Huo Tan。 There was a scene in YZG in which third brother and Yun Ge visits his grave。

  36. Thans Ockoala for the final chapter as promised!

    So many sacrifices in this last chapter. I was sorrowful for those that made them. Jiu Ye is a pitiful character. His last sacrifice surprised me as I did not see what happened to him in the end…coming. To me, he was a as brave as General Qu Bing in his own right as a healer.

    I will come back later with my shared likes, dislikes and reflections on Da Mo Yao.

  37. Just wanted to poke my head in once again! First of all, THANK YOU KOALA!!! I cannot imagine the effort you put in to translate these two volumes, and I know we all appreciate it. Secondly, what a ride! Talk about a love triangle (if I’m being honest, as great as Huo Qu Bing is, I think I still have a soft spot for Jiu Ye).

    I do feel slightly annoyed with the ending though. It did feel a little narratively unsatisfying that the ending is just a departure. It doesn’t really seem to me like any of the issues our OTP encountered were resolved, but rather that they could just be avoided.

    Otherwise? Loved DMY, and Loving YZG. Yay!

  38. Thanks!

    Reading the last chapter, I kinda feel sorry for jiu ye… Hope he eventually went on to find another companion…

  39. Koala, here’s a bear hug for you. Thank you so much for plowing through this novel even during your heartbreak. Can’t tell you how much I love this drama. So. Awesome!

    My heart breaks for Jiu Ye. Oh dear God please give him some loving. He so deserves it.

    So that was how it went down. I seriously could not think of a solution for Qu Bing and Yu Er to leave Chang An during the past couple of chapters. It’s kinda like Romeo and Juliet a bit, doesn’t it? But with a much happier ending. Tong Huo is very clever.

    Oh but my Jiu Ye…sob…sob…sob

  40. *sniffs sniffs* that was so painful. SO PAINFUL. my heart was aching in every direction and for all the reasons. I will be back to thank properly. ToT

    Have a safe trip. Thanks again.

  41. Thank you so so much for translating the whole of DMY for us. I’m happy that HQB and Jun Yu get to be together in the end…even though it’s kinda bittersweet….and he has to cut off ties with his former life….and Jiu Ye makes such huge sacrifices, unbeknownst to the couple. What an amazing story…we are so fortunate you can translate it for us!

  42. Omg thank you soooo much. Ive been waking up everyday at two just to read and check ut blogs. Thank you so much.

    I loved the ending! I wished Jin Ye would have a better ending but hey! He has an adopted son!! (despite whats gonna happen to him later on, that’s his decisions) But I really wished that the author would of have included a reunion between hqb and yu er and their baby boy! I was really looking forward to their reactions when they first see their baby 😀 but I love DMY!!

    Thanks, love u lots 😀

  43. What a heartbreaking ending to a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing this story with us Koala and have a safe flight.

  44. Thanks a million for the ending chapter and epilogue. Now I too can happily fly home tonight after finishing the novel that gives me such heartaches, happiness, laughter and tears. The story is truly about what true love means — is it to possess the person you love, or to give happiness to her/him with someone you think is better suited than yours? I can never answer this question because I think YE would have never minded not getting a child with JY if she can only have his love. JY hasn’t got the confidence that he can give the full happiness YE deserves, i.e. a family. He should have at least given her a chance to make her own decision, instead of shattering her hearts by rejecting her without giving her a clue as to his true reason for not accepting her innocent love she’s been offering her for two years. JY’s main fault is treating YE like a child, thinking he knows much better than her what’s good for her, not realizing it’s his own heart that will never recover from his decision based on noble idiocy. It’s his luck that HB gets away with YE right at the very moment JY realizes his mistake and chases after her. Life is, I suppose, a matter of timing; and also on decisiveness (HB never strays even a hair’s breadth from his utter devotion to YE, in spite of the opposition of the Emperor and the whole court and his vast family. In this instance, consistency and confidence in one’s feelings does play a huge role in achieving one’s objective). Still, it’s so heart-wrenching to read JY making the final sacrifice to lose his remaining good leg in order to save HB and give YE her happiness. Sadly, YE will never know this great sacrifice and also the first and last kiss from JY. I would like to have read how JY feels raising YE’s young son for one year. It must be bittersweet for him to look after a child who could have been his but fate decrees otherwise. I don’t know whether he’s too cautious as a physician to try for children with YE just because of the genetic defects he’s inherited. You never know your luck, maybe they would have been blessed with a relatively healthy child; and you can adopt a child anytime, too. So, a wrong decision based on logic drives JY to be lonely and longing for his lost life till the end of time. Sad, sad, but what a magnificent ending. HB and YE riding into the sunset won’t be as memorable if there’s no JY fleeing into the desert, lonely and heartbroken, and forever regretting his decision to not accepting YE’s love when first offered. Thanks once again, Ms. K, for deciding to go through with the translation right to the bittersweet end. I would have nightmares for the rest of my life, wondering how DMY ends if you’ve stopped halfway through as threatened twice. As a non-Chinese, I have to rely on your kindness and brilliance as a translator to read such wonderful novels like DMY and YZG. I’m looking forward to another shattering conclusion of the second novel.

  45. Dear Koala, I can’t say thank you enough for you to spend your time and effort translating DMY.. I am also reading your translation of YZG and hope you would continue. I have read DMY before you started the translation and I am actually understand the fact more now after ready your version.. i am also paying more attention to all the detail that might lead to YZG..

    I love the 3 leads.. and I am YE and HB shipper but I definitely love JY.. especially in the 2nd part of DMY… JY did so much for YE to make sure she is happy totally win me over… such a selfless guy… I know i will keep coming back here to read the DMY again.

    thanks and great job!

  46. Let me start off by thanking Ms Koala for introducing us to Chinese literature and translating the whole book for us. Ireally appreciate it.

    However, I am extremely angry right now even though am in tears. Why is it always Jiu Ye left to clean their mess. Why? I am so angry that HQB and Yu Er will have their happily ever after yet Jiu Ye will be suffering all his life. I am angry that over and over and over he gives all his heart, soul and energy to save BOTH of them yet all it gets him is a lifetime of emotional and physical pain. I am so pissed of right now that it’s not even funny. This is not fair at all!

    I hate Yu Er right now because he everything he did was for her. He was stuck in a rock and a hard place. If he didn’t cure HQB in time, Yu Er would have blamed him so he decided to use his body as a test subject and the price is he would never walk again. Granted one would say that no one forced him to do this but I think Yu Er unknowingly did. I hate her so much right now and I wish she never entered his life in the first place! I know people say it’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all but in this case Jiu Ye’s life would have been so much better if he never met her at all. He would still be able to walk, have no emotional baggage and possibly find someone else to love. I still think HQB didn’t thank him enough for all he has done for them even though he he bowed to the servant and decided not to change his son’s name. I am so angry HQB will continue living a charmed life while Jiu Ye will suffer for life.

    I’m pissed off at the writer too! Why give all the happiness to HQB and Yu Er while let Jiu Ye go through so much pain. Just because he made one mistake not to accept Yu Er’s love, he has to pay his whole life for it? This doesn’t make sense and it’s not fair! This hurts more than BBJX as he didn’t really do anything wrong! Tong Hua is a sadist.

    I will have to stop reading YGZ for a while till I get over my anger and sadness. Why didn’t I listen and buy a box of tissues yesterday?

    • I get your anger but at the same time what he did went with his character. He has always been silently giving and selfless. It also means that he takes pain and hurt to himself. He keeps his feelings hidden also. I also think that if JY knew that in exchange for Qu Bing’s life is MJ’s legs she wouldn’t have agreed for him to it. She would just rather died with Qu Bing instead. MJ knew that and will never accept that. He can’t accept anything than perfect happiness for JY (the very reason he distance himself from JY in the first place). I think the night she was sick and dying, MJ already made the resolve that as long as JY is happy, it doesn’t matter if he was the one to give it to her. I don’t think MJ regret giving up his legs. What he regret is not returning JY’s love in the beginning.

      I honestly think that JY would have been happy with either HQB and MJ. Both men love her in that unconditional epic kind of way that they would have done anything for her. I also think she loved both men simultaneously from beginning to end. She just didn’t want to realize her feelings for HQB in the beginning because she chose MJ first. He let that go. HQB was there for her at her emotional low. In the end, its about timing. I don’t think MJ deserve his ending. But I think that his ending comes because of the situation and his core personality of that silent sufferer thing he had going on. I am glad that JY entered MJ’s life because if it wasn’t for her, he would not open himself up. He wouldn’t learn that he could breathe and live life. He wouldn’t even be able to dream of the carefree he desire when he was hallucinating when he was sick.

      To be honest, while I love HQB and JY, my heart really does go to MJ. I just love him to bits and pieces. If I could, I would write a completely different story to give him his happy ending. But I am not sure if I would do that at the expense of HQB and JY’s perfect happiness. They went through a lot too. But I have to say, in the last chapter my heart was breaking for MJ completely. His misery definitely taint HQB and JY’s happiness for me. But that is the very reason why MJ didn’t want JY to know because he knew that it would taint the happiness for her too in a much deeper way.

      Basically, while HQB and JY have my heart, MJ pretty much owns me and my soul. I guess this reply would be my whole take on the book. I loved it, loved it, and have spent many a night refreshing your page for it, Koala. So thanks for everything.

      Jenny

    • It’s true that Jiu Ye never received thanks for his sacrifices, and I agree with you on that one. But in no way do I hate Yu Er for Jiu Ye’s sacrifices. I think he didn’t make these sacrifices not because if he didn’t that Yu Er would blame him, but really out of his love for Yu Er. Yu Er did not ask or force for any of these sacrifices, and had she known he was sacrificing so much she would have never allowed him to. Despite him never having been thanked for his sacrifices, I’d prefer it this way. If you consider the magnitude of what he has done, there is nothing anyone can do to thank him enough. Even if anyone thanked him, no one would believe that it would be enough. A missed chance does not warrant a lifetime of heartbreak, but a missed chance can alter everything. It’s like that regret you feel when you didn’t take a chance, and while we eventually get over it because other similar chances arise, there’s no second chance in love.
      I’d love for Jiu Ye to have a happy ending too, but I understand that it’s not possible in these circumstances. This just goes to show how much he loves Yu Er, and the lengths he will go to ensure that she lives happily. It kills me to see the pain that Jiu Ye is going through, but I’d rather see this than him moving on – it’d be too unrealistic. For one to love someone to this extent, I’d be miffed at the author if he moved on in a jiffy.
      I was able to accept the way it ended because it’s the way Jiu Ye’s character is. His sacrifices shape who he is and make him who he is. He’s ridiculously selfless, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

    • After this chapter, I can feel your frustration for Jiu Ye.

      I think Qu Bing used Jiu Ye’s love for Yu Er to make sure things happened in the way he knew (or hoped) would follow in the end, but knowing Yu Er’s temperament, they both knew would follow her man to the grave, hence Jiu Ye’s question about could she find someone else worth living for if he dies…..

      The one part in the novel where Qu spoke about JY always doing whatever YE asked was a little heartbreaking as it popped up in this final chapter with his losing a leg risking himself to ensure her happiness. It was unfair and I still get choked up thinking about what the writer did with him. I want to call her more than a “sadist”, but her writing is brilliant and realistic….

      If one does not live and be willing to die for something, I think life is basically meaningless…just my opinion. Our main characters were willing to live and die for what they believed in….Jiu Ye’s letter to Qu (not being able to pen her name was just another blow in the gut). The epilogue reminds me of Alex Clare’s song, “Too Close”…youtube.com/watch?v=zYXjLbMZFmo. It reminds me of the letter….

  47. Dear Koala, I cant thank you enough for all your hardwork and sacrifices. I enjoyed it all the way. This is my first Chinese novel, had it not been because of you, I will never get a chance to read one. One of my life’s passion is reading, which has helped me a lot in my profession. It’s my pleasure to have come across your playground and spent precious hours reading your entries aside from my medical books. Visiting and lurking in your playground is a form of sinful relaxation for me. I realy enjoyed every moment of it…. Again my heartfelt appreciation.
    As for DMY, my favorite character is Jiu Ye, you can consider my being biased because of his medical skills, and intellect. But aside from that he is a very complex character who at times can be unfathomable, so unreal. That owing to his sefllessness and overbearing devotion to his one true love, his character strikes me the most. With him I can felt true love, and it doesn’t always mean possessing the girl. Jiu Ye you are the most unforgettable character to me, you always give without expecting anything in return. I hope we can all love like him.

  48. The words thank you seems inadequate in the face of what you’ve done. You’ve not only translated TH’s DMY, but you also transferred the novel’s essence in your translation.
    But to show my appreciation, saying “thank you” is the only I can seem to do, so Ms. Koala, Thank you for your hard work, for taking on this project, and for sharing with us this sweeping moving story for the past several weeks, and for being so insightful and profound when doing so.
    Wish you a safe flight!

  49. Thanks for the translation Ms. Koala, you are AMAZING!!!

    I won’t consider this a happy ending, but a very good one for the situation they are in. Yu Er clearly still has some feeling for Jiu Ye, so having him say good bye to them for good is probably not a bad thing. If I am Jiu Ye, I would not want the person I love more than anything in this world to spend the rest of her life feeling sorry for me either!!!

    Yes, Jiu Ye sacrifices a lot for Yu Er, but that’s all out of his love for her. To be able to love someone so much and witness her being happy is a blessing. If he had not performed that last sacrifice for HQB, can you imagine how Yu Er will suffer emotionally for the rest of her life? Jiu Ye knows it, and he does not want her to live the rest of her lives without HQB.

    What a beautiful love story. I might as well throw away all my Harlequin Romance books now, there’s no way I can read those love stories after experiencing TH writing!!

  50. Thank you so much Ms. Koala for translating everything. Really a lot to think about. I loved the guys. They were epic.

    Have a terrific trip in HK!

  51. Words cannot describe my thanks for the time and effort you put into translating DMY for all of us. I ship OTP so I only used about 3-4 tissues reading this chapter but JY’s missed chance with YE really left an impression on me. I’m left so sad but yet so happy for HQB and YE and will look forward to your work on YGZ. Thanks again!

  52. Thank you koala for a great story to me , thanks to you I got the privilege of enjoying a new story. I have copied it and converted to pdf so I can read it whenever I want. This was a beautiful story and I am also enjoying the daughter’s story as well.

  53. First and foremost, God bless you Ms. K for the personal sacrifices you made in bringing this memorable love story to the attention and completion to those of us who are unable to read Mandarin (?).

    A few take aways from this novel:
    1. This may sound harsh, but as I tell my kids, “whoever said life was fair.” Luck favors the prepared. Unfortunately for Jie Ye, he was not prepared to receive and return Yu Er’s love when she made her confession. However, while I understand HQB’s intention in witholding from Yu Er his knowledge of Jie Ye’s attempts to find her, personally I can’t help find his choice to be more self-serving and less altruistic. I may be wrong.

    2. “Love is deeds not sweet words.” Time and time again, Jiu Ye, HQB, and Yu Er showed the depth of their love by never hesitating in laying down their life for the other. This love triangle is one I won’t forget for a long time.

    3. My respect for Yu Er’s character solidified when she kept her word regarding her future marriage to HQB and did not vacillate when Jui Ye made his confession to her and the many other tender and heartbreaking moments she and Jui Ye shared in the following chapters.

  54. wow. it has ended. I feel the way I felt when Harry Potter ended.
    just ….empty. i feel like i lost a friend or something. They were so
    real, and to say goodbye to HGB, MJ and Yu Er…i am not ready at all.

  55. Thank you so much. I appreciate that this story is not about the OTP – HQB and Jin Yu – getting together, but more about Tong Hua showing us the power of love and the sacrifices one is willing to make for the person they hold dearest. It was only fitting that the epilogue was dedicated to JY’s love for Jin Yu and his final goodbye to her, no matter how heartbreaking. Tong Hua created a most memorable story that has made me entranced with this genre – which I would have never discovered, if it hadn’t been for you, Koala.

    I can’t thank you enough for the gift of DMY – and I am so excited to experience the breathtaking adventure of Yun Ge in YZG. You’re amazing – and you’ve made my painful winter months ten times more amazing 🙂

  56. Thank you so much Koala for translating this, and also bringing this Chinese novel to my attention. While coming across your site for other drama recaps I saw your post on Da Mo Yao, and the moment I clicked on the post I was doomed. I stayed up til 3 or 4 in the morning reading all the chapters that were out, and when there were none left I turned to searching up the Chinese novel itself. I can read Chinese, but this was the biggest challenge I’ve had yet as I was born in Canada. Despite being able to understand most of it, the fact that Tong Hua used proverbs totally threw me off, and being able to read your translations helped me so much. Your translations are amazing, and completely reflect what the author was trying to say – no meanings were lost in your translations. Thank you so much, Koala <3

  57. Thank you so much for this translation! I was expecting to feel elated because HQB and Jin Yu could finally be together. However, the epilogue really made me feel for Jiu Ye. He sacrificed everything for her.

  58. a truly breath taking story, the ending was painful but deeply beautiful giving the meaning of true love in not only in JY and HQB’s story but also MJ’s enwavering love for JY – I am extremely grateful u never stopped translating. I dont think i will pick up YZG because i want DMY to imprint in my mind as a happy ending to JY and HQB and their family as the birds they are and flyy to the sky without any set backs and heartbreaks. Thank you again!!!

  59. Is it possible to have a book withdrawal Syndrome? Gawd, Im so gonna miss Da Mo Yao… Ms K, I’ve said so many times again, thank you so much.. I dont know what to say coz up to now I still cant believe its over..

  60. Thanks so much koala for translating!!
    I’ve been following your translations from the start. Although I have finished listening to the audiobook, but nothing compares when it is written in English, especially all the poems that were beautifully translated! I hope you will continue to translate YZG..

  61. I don’t know what made me cry more – the chapter or the epilogue! There aren’t enough adjetives (superb, wonderful, heart-rending, fantastic, gripping, soul-stirringly romantic, etc…) to describe DMY. I’ve shared my thoughts on each chapter post; now I’m processing this final installment. I enjoyed every chapter and the great discussions that resulted. This is a great bookclub read. I’m SO GLAD you decided to share!

    Koala, I’ve thanked you for every chapter and I hope it’s a testament to your translating skills that I actually *felt* the roller coaster of emotions between YE, MJ, and HQB. Thanks to you, I *saw* the mountainside of Lovers Vines, and *experienced* MJ’s many losses right along with him.

    I’m reluctant to part with DMY and will soon start reading your chapters all over again….like returning to a favorite place and reuniting friends. If ending this novel can be compared to a dark cloud, then YZG is the silver lining. After reading this post, I have a better understand of the opening chapters of YZG and the DMY references it contains that now have greater importance.

    But, I still can’t believe this is the last chapter of DMY! As I said in a previous post, YE & HQB’s life and epic love will continue long after we close the book…….. I’m glad they got their happy ending. <3

  62. I just landed! Clearly everyone is schmoopy about Jiu Ye, which is understandable. Anyways, buy more tissues and have a good cry, m’kay? I’m off on another transit flight but will offer some of my own closing thoughts later when I’m all settled in. Thank you guys for being so appreciative of my translation efforts. It means a lot, it really was a monumental undertaking, and I’m so happy I saw it through to the end. 😀

  63. Dear Koala,

    The ending is really sooo sad, but at the same time really great. The author simply knows how to tug at our hearts and make us cry buckets.

    Thanks a zillion times for your magnificent translations of this exquisite novel. I’ll be reading this over and over until I can get it out of my system. Parting is such sweet sorrow.

  64. Hi everyone! Can’t believe DMY has really ended. I have truly enjoyed the ride and the experience left me with this bittersweet feeling.

    First, thank you so much Koala for your handwork!!! I hope you realize how grateful we are us. Most of us are newbies when it comes to Chinese literature and drama and we will be forever in your debt for you have been the instrument and catalyst for this new addiction.

    I remembered that I read the first chapter of DMY out of curiosity. It was confusing at first since I am not that familiar with Chinese culture and history. But I found the characters interesting and that is why I continued. And I’m glad I did! Around the middle of the first book, I decided that this kind of story is my cup of tea. I made the momentous decision of watching BBJX since they have the same author. And boy, I was really glad that I watched BBJX because it changed my life. I have never been a fan of sad endings, but BBJX and Tong Hua’s writing made me realize that sad endings can touch your soul like no happy endings can!

    From the start, I have been a Yue Er and Qu Bing fan. I’m glad that they had a happy ending and thank God for YZG because at least we get to see a glimpse of their happy life after DMY. What strikes me about DMY is that in this lifetime, it can be possible that there would be two different people who will love you (HQB and JY), who will be both perfect for you and where it wouldn’t matter who you choose because both of them will love you until their dying breath. I find that though blissful, because finding one love is hard enough this days. And yet depressingly sad, because the unchosen one will have to live a lifetime of regrets and pain (JY).

    I feel a little sad about the ending because I wish they’ve given us more details about what happened. I am especially looking forward to the scene where they will see Yi Er.

    Anyway, just one question regarding Huo Tan. I had the impression that he was brought up by Yu Er and Qu Bing. How did they manage to get him from the palace?

      • I’m pretty positive he didn’t die because *SPOILER* in Yun Zhong Ge one of the main male leads is Jiu Ye’s adopted son. He survived…but honestly I kind of want someone to write a fanfiction for all those what ifs Jiu Ye was agonizing about…

  65. Thanks so much! Loved the story. Such a bitter sweet ending. I’m a little confused though… In YZG, Yun Ge mentions second brother and third brother but never first brother, which I assume is Yi Er… Am I missing something?

  66. Thank you for the translation of DMY. I really appreciate it since this is my first completed read of a translated chinese novel. 🙂

    I am so glad that Yu Er and QB got their happy ending. I am sad that MJ did not get a happy ending of his own but in a way, he did by making sure that YE got hers since he loves her too.

  67. Thanks a lot. . . . .b’coz of u i got to know this great novel. To visit ur site is like a basic need for me so, i want to thank u frw the bottom of my heart. . . . .u r an inspiration.

  68. Thank you so much for your generousity in sharing and sacrificing your time to translate this beautiful story for us Ms Koala!

    It was so sad when JY was sitting beside the dead HQB and cried whilst saying to herself “no more meeting in sight!”. Whilst everyone thought she was crying for the dead HQB, really she was crying for the JY that she won’t see anymore. I cried and cried too.

  69. Many thanks to Ms. Koala for your hard work and dedication in completing DMY translation. I find that you are an eloquent, clever, and accurate writer. By introducing YZG in the mid of DMY I got good ideas that HQB and Yu Er would ended up together with 3 children. I love Jiu Ye character. He is a perfect man from the beginning to the end. He initially rejected Yu Er’s love due to fear that he can’t give her a perfect family life, but he was always loving her. His love for her was always there and it grows bigger and deeper even when she moved on to QB. He keeps on loving her and giving her anything to keep living a happy life. I also love Yu Er character because she is such a loving and caring person. She is smart and not afraid of expressing her love to people around her. She was always true to herself, caring and observant of others’ needs and didn’t create stupid misunderstandings. I love QB because he is a one woman man. He is a man-man.

    I also enjoyed reading many other readers discussion, spoilers and insight. Thanks so much Koala for tagging us along DMY and YZG love stories. Take care and a fun trip in Hong Kong.

  70. THANKS a whole lot !!!!! To be honest only after reading and feeling Jie Ye’s pain….i can realize that in the drama…..he’ll probably get more attention because of his sacrifices…(although i dont think i can make with him dying)…i cant do anything about the cast…and though i love the story as Yu-Bing……i think i’ll ship Jie-Yu….though i know that ship will sink….lol
    Thanks again though !!!!

  71. Thank you for all your hard work. I really couldn’t express in words how I truly appreciate your translation as I cannot read Chinese. My love for BBJX brought me here and now I’m in love with DMY too!

    Following your casts, it will be hard for me to watch the drama but I will try though I will remain true to your choice!

    Gambate and I am off to read YZG now!

  72. Oh my gawd… The epilogue, I was just heartbroken when I read it.

    I thought HQB and YE would go and save their “adopted” son in the palace? I was lead to believe that when I read people’s comments YZG chapters (though I haven’t started reading it yet)

    I bawled at this line: If……if……sadly life has no ifs.

    Thank you Koala for taking the time to translate this entire story for us to read and weep but enjoy this profound love story between HQB and YE and the self-sacrificing JY

    • “if” what a lifetime of sorrow! I cried too. Meng Jiu could have been living a happy life with Yu er. I’m going to miss all the characters in this story.

  73. Can I just state how much I love you for embarking, continuing and finishing this project, Koala? I had absolutely no idea that I would love this so much… I never ever ever touch historical dramas. And I never read translated stuff – I usually find the wordings translated awkwardly to English. So when I found myself reading this all afternoon – and absolutely loving every single sentence of it – I was pretty shocked. And happy. But shocked.

    So yeah…. a million plus infinity of thank you’s, for you to take this project on. It was beautifully executed, and an absolute joy to read, thanks to your dedication, passion, and hard work.

  74. argh.. it’s over! ><

    *sigh* Jiu Ye, I can't even…
    I mean there are quite a few secondary male leads who are the "nice" guy protecting the girl from behind the scenes but none of them can compare to this guy.
    Step aside all second leads, we got ourselves a winner. And it's not even the noble idiot. He's just noble. Well, okay he was kind of an idiot in the beginning but that is the moral of the story.

    There's the perfect timing for everything….

    Thank you so much mrs.koala! I will now go on to read the other translation.

  75. the best love story I’ve ever read…I was speechless at first reading, unbelieving at second reading and crying at third reading….Thank you Koala-san for your beautiful translation of DMY…

  76. sigh…what en ending….
    but i suppose there is no other possible better ending than this.

    If Jiu Ye fails to cure Qubing, then Jinyu will most likely give up her life as well. In this case, Jiu Ye will forever be haunted by his own guilt, might as well living as a dead man.
    If Jiu Ye successfully cure Qubing & Jinyu knows it costs Jiu Ye’s ability to walk, then it is a tragedy for all those 3. Jinyu & Qubing might be together but they will be the ones haunted with guilt for the rest of their lives, & Jiu Ye’s sacrifice is just pointless since it doesn’t bring happiness to any of them but regret & sorrow. Might as well continue on their lives as monks & a nun … (d’ohhhhhhhhh)

    anyway, sorry to differ from Koala unni about the casting or the novel adaption, I think HuGe will definitely steals this show away from ShiShi & Eddie. So, I don’t feel sorry for HuGe ending up playing this MengJiu’s role. Because I think in the end, people will be captured so much into MengJiu’s ultimate sacrifice & it will stays longer in people’s heart.

    am looking forward to watch the drama… will have boxes of tissues ready by then.

    and many many many thanks to Koala unni for her hardwork. Eucalyptus on the way =)

    • I agree with you Nina. Huge is smart in choosing Meng Jiu. Although Huo Qu Bing is a historic hero, MJ is more to a less-than-perfect handsome, rich and influential man only because of his handicap. Huge said he fell in love with MJ once he read the novel. For artists, it is always more about quality characters(in dramas/movies). That is why LSS, Nicky Wu and Kevin Cheng are all so hot now because of their characters in BBJX.
      I have no doubt that when the drama comes along, there will still be lots of fans who support HuShi. I am one of them. MJ will definitely win the hearts of many. MJ’s more like Prince Long Yang in XianJian3 (also played by Huge).
      Thank you Koala for the brilliant translation.
      I bought BBJX and DMY novels and have been reading them for months. I especially bought them from Amazon.cn.
      Although not written by Tong Hua, there is a BBJX2 novel by Yu Duo Duo. It’s a sequence from BBJX’s cast. Not bad.
      Another interesting novel I am enjoying now is “Jing Feng Yu Lu”.
      I started falling in love with Cdrama and Cartists- only Liu Shi Shi. Simply love her.
      And now, I am watching the now-airing, “Xuan Yuan Jian”.

  77. this is one of the situation where I wish the girl can have more than one husband.
    many thanks for translating this novel ms koala.

  78. I read the Chinese version after reading the 1st 2 chapter of translation by Ms Koala. So haunting is the story that I continued to re-read the translation here…TH has sheltered Jin Yu from having to carry the guilt of Jiu Ye’s sacrifice and yet tossed the burden to us, the readers, to feel the pain, forever haunting us… While I am happy for Jin Yu and Qu Bing, I doubt can remember their happiness without remembering Jiu Ye’s pain. Big applause for this haunting story by TH and the beautiful and accurate translation by Ms Koala! Thanks for doing justice to the translation of the original text. =)

  79. Dear Ms. Koala,

    I’m not sure whether i can express in words how grateful i am for this playground and all that it has brought me… the last months has been just awesome in which you bought DMY into our lives.
    I am sure Tong Hua is an exceptional writer, but your translations of her chapters has been exceptional to me! They were written so vividly well that i just couldn’t help and be sucked into the story! Reading DMY here is like eating a cupcake…easy and delicious!
    As for this last chap… my heart really ached for Jiu Ye HARD! But that didn’t me change my shipping of HQB and Jin Yu… I would have LOVED to read how they reunite with their son and a picture of their carefree life and having two more kids together… but I guess ending the story here will do the book more justice… rather than overly describing how their lives will end up. I guess i’ll just need to get my goodies out of YZG about them.. however little that will be 🙂

    Anyways, I am so happy for you and for us you could wrap up the amazing DMY project and again so sooo grateful for all you have brought into our lives!

    I hope all in all you had a pleasant flight and will have a great stay at where ever you are going and what ever you might be doing 🙂 Looking forward for you final thoughts!!

    • okay adding remark…. -_____- i should really reread comments i typed up before posting… the mistakes are just @_@ ugh!!

      • I loled at your second remark. that’s exactly the kind of comment i would make. 😀

        And yes, Ms. Koala, thank you very very much for your stellar translations!

  80. First of all, thank you miss koala for giving me a journey worth to remember
    I looove looveee looove HQB more than the rest of the characters. Such a straightforward guy. His view on love reminds me of Domyouji of HYD. Minus being a jerk and stupid. And what do you know..meng jiu is so rui 🙁
    Thank you again for bringing their love story into the english speaking drama lover. My only wish is to read how HQB and YE finally went and see their baby for the first time. Papa Quo Bing sounds delish

  81. THANK YOU Ms Koala for completing the translation of this novel.
    Thank to you I now can claim I have read a Chinese novel.

    Because of your great translation skills not only was I interested in the story but also in the real historical figures so now I know a tiny bit about the Chinese history.

    And about opportunity? Well, if it comes to love, you shouldn’t hesitate. Show and say how you feel, there’s a 50:50 chance the other person might feel the same about you. You may feel embarrass but at least you won’t regret and asked yourself later IF….

    And talking of which I now need to declare: YOU ARE MY FIRST LOVE Ms Koala, a person I have never met! Love your playground and love your work!
    <3

  82. Ms Koala, many thanks for your hard work. The translation for Da Mo Yao is very well done with all the characters potray vibrantly and poignant moments captured nicely. Great job! I hope the upcoming drama will do justice to the book.

  83. Waahhh !!! DMY has ended !!!! First of all , a very big thank you and lots of hugs for Koala san , who was able to bring us so much happiness for completing DMY ! what a roller-coaster of emotions …. there was a time when I thought we wouldn’t be able to finish reading this novel because of emotional turmoil about the castings for the drama adaptation …. fortunately , Koala san continued her great efforts in completing the translations which is truly a commendable feat !
    I’m happy for the main couple , but I’m really sad for Jiu ye … OMG ! what a heartbreaking fate for him ! But I guess , he was really happy for Yuer and HQB , and that was a consolation …..but still …..
    I’m looking forward to reading more chapters of YZG ! I know you can do it again , Koala san ! Fighting !!!!! More power to you , and God bless you !!!!!
    I salute you !!!

  84. Everytime i read this chapter my heart cries for Jiu Ye and this line “If……if……sadly life has no ifs.” just makes me cry everytime.Ur DMY translation totally reached to my heart with every feelings. Again thanks and i bow to u for givin me happy sad feelin thru ur translation of DMY.

  85. What a wonderful ending! THank you so much for giving us English speaker a chance at this amazing novel. It feels very bittersweet. I just love Jiu Ye! It breaks my heart that he thinks of her so much. On the other hand, he tossed away his shot at happiness years ago. It makes you question your decisions in life and there consequences…. *sign***

  86. At last it h as come to an end…thank you ms. k for your hard work in translating the book. I had lost all interest in novels because it lost the ability to surprise or move me emotionally. But this last chapter nearly had me in tears. (would probably had cried if there wasn’t so many people around me that might think I was crazy :P)

    Nothing against Huo Qu Bing, but I fell in love with Meng Jiu more. I like the silent supporting type and yes he wronged Jin Yu and will pay for that mistake for the rest of his life, I still cannot come to find anything wrong with him. His story and his decisions and actions all made me love him so much and just want to be able to know more about him.

    It will probably take me a few weeks before I can visit Da Mo Yao again. I loved all the characters even Yi Zhi Xie minor parts always had me wishing he could give Jin Yu a proper explanation before life happens.

    Thank you again ms. K. I now want to read Yun Zhong Ge and hear the glimpse of Jin Yu and Huo Qu Bing life and that awesome third brother you love so much. But I remember you saying Yun Zhong Ge was Tong Hua saddest tragic tale yet and I don’t know how much more pain I can bare for the Meng guys.

  87. Thank you so much for translating DMY for us! You’re so generous, can’t emphasize enough how much I love your translation, thanks again! I do not know what you are doing in your real life but you should really consider a career in writing (if you are not already in this line!) because you’re really talented! Your translation does not read like a translation at all, it actually flows nicely and well, I don’t know why the publishers are not contacting you to publish the translation yet 🙂

    Anyway back to DMY, I feel so sad abt Jiu Ye and can’t wait to hear more abt him in YZG. I just hope he has a better life after DMY sigh. There’s something I feel is lacking in the stories around Jiu Ye though. There was no mention of what actually he has promised to the emperor in order to get Jin Yu out of jail. I guess this is what you get when the story is only being told from Jin Yu’s point of view sigh.

    I used to like HQB a lot but right now I’m totally immersed in YZG and yes, Meng Jiu all the way! Even rooting for Liu Bing Yi now but still not feeling Liu Fu Ling. Yup, guess you can tell I’ve already moved on to YZG.

  88. Congratulations! Despite all the heartaches and frustrations… you followed through the end and truly you deserve the victory and our praises! We, your readers are proud of you! Keep it up!

  89. *standing ovation*

    First, I’d like to thank Ms Koala for her wonderful work! Even though you love the book, it can be hard at times and need patience. I’m so thankful that you decided to share a book you loved with those of us who can’t read chinese… you could have just recommended the book and let us hope someday it would come out in english… but you’re generous and went further: you went through hard work and spent precious time translating it for us. I can’t thank you enough.

    That said, it was such an expererience reading this. For the first time, it felt like I was part of a book club. We would read the book together, and then discuss it. Or remain quite while reading what others thought about it. I loved everything about this!!

    This really is the story of Huo Qu Bin and Jin Yu. There isn’t much plot and everyone else are just vehicles to push the story forward and not be only about HQB and JY. There isn’t anything wrong with that, because I read this book for them…! Jyu Ye didn’t inspire much feeling in me expect for the last chapters… he showed how he cared for Yu Er.. he didn’t just love her, he cared for the things she loved too, when he saw that she wouldn’t come back to him, he did the only thing he could: help her be happy in any way he could. He won my respect.

    Now I’m going to read everything again, during a long weekend when winter comes, tucked in while eating chocolate.

    And looking forward to the next chapters of YZG, which is so so so so good, I’m already in love with it.

  90. Thank you ockoala for once again introducing us to another piece of great novel by Tong Hua!!! I have been enjoying it since the beginning ’til the end… Like some people mentioned already it is a bittersweet emotion for me! I did feel JY’s pain and sadness in the epilogue and there were lots of “ifs” on my mind.

    I love both male leads ’cause they want the best for the one they love! I am thankful that the author revealed to us how JY gave himself for her happiness. Why is my heart dripping in blood as well??! Ok, I am a bit emotional here!

    Big hugs to everyone for sharing their thoughts in each past postings!! HUGE hugs to you for all your hardworking!!!! ^^

  91. *applause*

    A big thank you Ms Koala for finishing this grand project! I’m really grateful to you for your generosity, passion and time spent translating this wonderful novel. Like YC said, your translation flows so well it didn’t read like a translated work at all…! Another masterful work from Tong Hua!

    As a big Hu Ge fan, although I can totally see him as HQB, I must give him credit for taking up the role of MJ which in my opinion is a much more challenging role to take on….all that inner emotions and turmoil while maintaining a gentlemanly, serene and calm facade is difficult even for a seasoned actor. I look forward to HG breaking out from his usual “playful turn serious” character mould and totally steal the show here. This may be another breakout role for HG and one that I’m sure will leave an indelible impression on viewers.

    Now on to YZG cos I just couldn’t bring myself to read the sequel without completing DMY. Yay for more Tong Hua and Koala’s translation magic!

  92. Oh gawd, the extra additional passage just made my heart wrench even more: “In this lifetime, happiness was once so close to him, but he missed it.”

    And he’s terminally ill from him coughing up blood TT^TT

  93. Just dig the knife in deeper why don’t cha? The additional writings are just too sad. It’s like the man we see that Jiu Ye is dying away internally little by little like what a flesh eating disease does to a person…. 🙁

    This last part has me and now I will have to give this drama a try now to see how HG portrays JY.

    This was a remarkable journey and I am truly appreciative of all your hard work to bring this novel to us Ockoala.

    I will re-read this one before starting YZG.

  94. Thanks a lot for translating such a well-written novel and let me have a change to read chinese novel even though it is a translated novel.

    I love this story although I am reading Chapter 21 now.
    I am longing to read YZG after I finish reading DMY.

  95. Thanks so much for this!! I waited until you finished. I printed them all, all in all 290 pages of solid text, plus perhaps 5 more pages for cover and page list and all, am binding them in 2 volumes. Reserved some space in my cramped bookshelves for this. In fact I am throwing out the useless Twilight and its books to make way for this and your ongoing project as well. This is my treasure. Your effort which is professional standard in my opinion is much much much appreciated.

    How I wish you did the same for Bu Bu Jing Xin. But that is asking too much!

  96. Thanks, Koala!!!! I’ve just finished reading it and I cried for the epilogue. I loves MJ’s character and I always hope that he will be the one with JY.

    Thanks again for translating this novel because I can’t read Chinese well.

  97. Thank you so much!! First, I love Hou. but in the end became MJ to love.
    I’ll never forget his secrifice. I’m still crying ㅠㅠ^^
    I will eventually meet again believe Jin and Mj.
    And, I’m hoping to publish a book translated into korean. ㅎㅎ

  98. Does anyone know what meng jiu was referring to when he wanted to know what expression huo qu bing may have when HQB and yiu er see the sign of the gold desert and the blue yue Shang spring when they go to pick up there son?

  99. Thank you so much, Koala for your hardwork in translating both novels. You’ve done a great job translating…you’re a great writer. I love this novel more than YZG because it has a happier ending. I can’t wait until the drama comes out. Thanks for letting me understand this wonderful novel in english.

  100. Thank you very much for your hard work!

    Although this seems to be a sad story, it feels like there’s still the light at the end of the tunnel. I love all the three characters. None of them were wrong. I can only blame the fate. Maybe in the real life, it will not be so cruel to Jiu Ye.

    I first read the first 4 chapters in Vietnamese because I don’t know Chinese. But the rest has not been translated into Vietnamese, then I knowed about your translation. You can imagine how happy and grateful I am. You work is really great!

    Again, thank you for making this wonderful novel to many more people. Thank you for sharing you thoughs and hints at the beginning of each chap (one of my favourite thing is reading those). Well done!

  101. Fuck me that was a gut punch ending and I feel a little sick. What a beautiful book. Excuse me while I go die somewhere now…… fuck.

    Thank you Koala. I loved reading this more than I can even say.

  102. Thank you. Thank you. THANK YOU.
    Despite all my attempts, I don’t think I can properly thank you enough. It was an absolute pleasure reading this novel and it was only possible because of you, Ms Koala <3

    The epilogue – ow. Jiu Ye's ending strongly reminds me of Yu Wen Yong from The Prince of Lan Ling. I feel for Jiu Ye though. He loved her so much that for her happiness, he poisoned himself to save her lover. Wow.
    Huo Qu Bing – I think I fell hard for this guy. Everything about him from his cheekiness to his horniness, I adore 🙂
    And Yu Er! It was such a lovely thing to have a strong female character like her. She's headstrong and willful but you can't help but love her.

    EHHH. I can't wait for the drama now! I've watched the 15 minute trailer a shameful amount of times and I'm just torturing myself with this wait. Crossing my fingers that I'll be rewarded soon.

    Thanks again, Koala! Without you I'd have missed out big time on this jewel 🙂

  103. Yu er and HQB will forever by my OTP and I love their romance in the novel. However, when I watch the drama, I just KNOW that Jiu Ye will be my favorite forever. Just watching Hu Ge’s portrayal of Jiu Ye and knowing his absolutely heartbreaking ending will just make me so so so sad.

  104. Thank You kindly for translating this novel. As I read this last chapter I had both tears of happiness and tears of sadness streaming down my face.

    I loved reading every bit of your translations and have fallen in love with both HQB and JY. Though I am so happy with the fact that HQB and Yu Er got their well deserved happy ending, my heart aches so much for JY. Fate can be so cruel and sometimes when you miss seizing and holding on to your own happiness it’s gut-wrenching to see it slip away.

    Thanks again Ms Koala for sharing your love of DMY and your love of the characters with us!

    • Let me just say it simply Huo Qu Bing and Jin Yu death is fake. Meng Jiu is now handicap form experience the poison on himself.

  105. I waited two years for the drama to air and I have finally decide to read the book. Sometime I wonder If Tong Hua would consider writing any of her books in English for her English speaking fan. Koalas I will like to know what your thoughts are for the drama so far (since it on air)? This Chapter was probably the best one. I can help but to feel sorry got Meng Jiu.

  106. I’m crying, but I cannot shed tears.
    I’m sad for Meng Jiu and the sacrifice he made to make the woman he love happy. It was bravely done, yet stupidly if Jin Yu knew the truth. But he knew in his heart that he would only be happy if he sees her happy.

    I guess after watching the MVs I kept waiting for that moment when their death is fake so that it would end. And now we’re at the end, I’m happy that they can escape the drama in the kingdom and live happily in the desert.

    I personally think Tong Hua did a wonderful job creating the characters, and combine history with fiction. A perfection with art. And thank to Koala for taking your time to translate these volumes. I am forever grateful to you. Da mo Yao has become one of my favorite books. and I won’t hesitate to read it again.

  107. I too wish to thank Ms. Koala for her translation. I just finished watching on the web (HunanTv and YouTube) and I would have been lost as to many of the relationships in the Palace without Ms. Koala’s effort (my Chinese just isn’t that good).

    P.S. And a big “no thanks” to HunanTv for letting me watch the first 32 episodes and then on episode 33 telling me I couldn’t watch because I did not live in Zhongguo Dalu (mainland China).

  108. OMG TONG HUA!!!!!!!!! QUEEN OF ANGST AND TRAGEDY! I SWEAR TO GOD. she knows the best way to torture my feelings and my heart…. im a shipper of MJ AND JY… im so sad she moved on 🙁 one of the things that made me like yun zhong ge a lot more than da mo yao is that YG didn’t move on from LING GEGE 🙂 even though ling gege died she continued with her life with no second love, which was perfect to me. if she had began a life with meng jue that would have been exactly like JY moving on from MJ and marrying Huo Qu Bing…. ugh. but now that ive actually thought about it the men in MENG JIU AND MENG JUE’s FAMILY REALLY HAVE NO LUCKY with women… they should never fall in love the women from JY’s line…. ahhh…. both MJ and MJ lived on without their lives… knowing they missed the chance the “timing” goddamnit tong hua why do you torture them both like this? and you make the both lose the girl in the same way…. “timing” sigh…. i’m just gnna go cry some more

  109. Hello. I somewhere downloaded the pdf of your translation, a complete chapters of Da mo yao. But I’ve lost it. Can anyone tell me the link to the pdf ?

  110. I don’t know how to feel right now. So happy for the family, but so sad for MJ! And I still want those who were schemeing against HQB to find them happy and die from anger or something like that.

    Thank you so much to Koala for the translation/summaries.

  111. Thank you so much for translating this story. It is a masterpiece, and I am forever grateful for your effort to share it with us. Thank you.

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