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Lost You Forever Chapter 22: It Feels Like Such a Long Parting — 77 Comments

  1. When xiang liu forced XY to wake up by telling her about Jing..I really feel like a bromance between XL and Jing even though they aren’t in those terms..XL could be a great brother for Jing, unlike Hou.

    When XY kissed Jing to get the medicine through..I can’t stop thinking..girl..did you brush your teeth after 37years? Or gods always have nice breath?..lol..

  2. thanks!

    I also love the image you used above (it’s actually one of the wallpapers I use on my phone and tablets with the Muzei live app). I think the couple is DongHua & FengJiu from Tang7’s Three Lives Three Worlds Pillow Book.

  3. xiang liu oh xiang liu. everything he had done for xiao yao sob. definitely my favorite character in LYF.

    it’s great that jing is willing to let go everything for xiao yao.

    feng long is a brat ugh.

  4. In one of Tong Hua’s interview (I think the weibo Q&A), she said there is 2 meanings when Xiang Liu asked Xiao Yao not to hate him. The obvious one being having some nine head demon powers (breath under water). What about the other meaning?

    • I would also like to know!
      My guess is that he has been touching her all over the place, remember they were hugging very closely during healing? (she also woke up in loose fitting robe, so at some point in time she must have been naked), that’s why he tells her not to hate him.

      Or, that he chose not to heal Jing even though he could have been able to.

      • In one paragraph, it is stated that they are intimate while the healing goes on. Perhaps , it’s not only KL’s blood that was transfused but also his sperm? Perhaps, XY will get pregnant with XL’s child and Jing will love that child like his own, just like the Grand Emperor loves XY despite knowing that she is not his. In other words, history repeats itself.

      • @Poheijo… wow! i would much prefer XY is wide awake looking into XL’s eyes during erm..sperm “transfusion” though…

    • ohoh!!! I think he knows she will hate him when she finds out that him saving her was for an exchange deal with Zhuan Xu. Meaning it was for political reasons rather than personal. That’s why he is asking her not to hate him.

      • I dont think XL saved xiao yao in exchange for the deal with ZX. That was just a convenient cover. He wdve saved her irregardless but he doesnt want her to feel obligated to him and more so he doesnt want her to know he loves her so he makes it look like he’s doing it as a calculated move. XL oh XL, why oh y cant you tell xiao yao you love her? If he was there when she woke up, she might have just taken the chance and opened her heart completely to him. Instead he literally pushed her to Jing….grrrr

      • yes yes, of course we know it’s a convenient cover, because Xiang Liu will never let Xiao Yao know what he does (and will do in future!!! T.T) for her is really his love for her. BUT! He has to destroy all these by always presenting a motive in every single thing he does.

        Xinag Liu deserves a spanking.

      • @lovexiangliu
        I agree with the first reason you gave, but the second cannot be true at all. I’m sorry for offending you but, the reason why the 2nd reason cannot be true is because XiangLiu has always do things like this. What I mean by things is – he always cover up his kindness with XY with some reason so she does not know that he secretly in love with her.
        His request with ZX sound reasonable at first, but if you think about what kind of person XiangLiu is, the request start to make less sense.
        XL loyalty to the resistance army is not with Sheng Nong, it is with Gao Gao. He wanted to help his adoptive father. Although he has trained with the army for a long time, but I don’t think XL is the type that get affected by trivial feeling.

    • I think what XL meant by -if Tu Shan Jing died..XY would hate her-
      its because XL could have waken her up sooner..but he loves her so much and wanted to keep her by his side as much as he could. But after 37years..Jing is dying. .and if XL didn’t wake her up. Jing could really die. So XY would hate him for not using his power to wake her up and save Jing in time

      • XL could not wake up XY any sooner than he did… when XL woke up XY, XY fainted from the pain – her whole being were destroyed and then mended… if XL did it any earlier, XY would not be able to tolerate it at all.

        XY ‘hating’ XL is because of two things – 1. hate XL because he transferred demon blood to her, 2. hate XL because XL made a deal with XZ to cover up XL’s real reason for saving XY (that XL loves XY).

  5. Hi Ms K, do you think you could really really spoil us and translate some interviews from Tong Hua about this book? Normally Id have read through everything possible online about a current book obsession, but this one leaves me feeling like I’m going cold turkey between your translations. Again, thank you so so so very very much for your time and efforts in sharing this book with us. I still think you should put up a paypal or something for donations 🙂 🙂 🙂

  6. Thank you Koala! I simply loved this chapter! It was heartbreakingly beautiful, the scenes with Xiang Liu, a view into Xiao Yao’s lonely heart, Jing’s everlasting devotion and confession, Xiao Yao’s care for Jing just like the days of Ye Shi Qi. The chapter started out somber, but I actually ended it laughing! Xiao Yao tip-toeing back to Jing’s room, Feng Long’s outburst (maybe I shouldn’t have laughed because he is rightly angry since he did stake a claim (brothers before flowers, no?) but his dense nature and Jing’s candidness and Feng Long flipping the table and saying how Jing seduced his woman) made me laugh. Anyway, I have so many emotions going on. I guess this would be the only time Xiang Liu will have his life with Xiao Yao. Even though she was unconscious, but it was really like they were a married couple hidden at the bottom of the sea. I’m sure he probably treated it as such. How it must’ve pained him to send her back and wake her up to save Jing and give them that chance and try to gain a possible bargain with Zhuan Xu for a peak in Sheng Nong Mountain. Sigh. I think it was really telling that Xiao Yao was loathed to part with him as well and clung onto Furball’s neck, but once she saw Jing again, she again found another safe haven. Her love life is so complicated. She unconsciously love Xiang Liu and Zhuan Xu (I find Zhuan Xu is another one of her safe haven, a place she calls “home” because she always returns back to him whenever she goes away on trips, etc), but actively loves Jing because she gave him her promise. However, I don’t think the 15 years count anymore since they both slept through it.

    • I have a feeling I’ll read this chapter over and over again because that’s how much I loved it.

      Lol. I almost forgot how I did LOL when XY said that she won’t hate XL if he continues to talk to her and when he stopped she got angry and yelled that she hates him! She’s such a girl. Haha.

      I also cried when Zhuan Xu shared his story about the reason he wanted power which was to protect his loved ones. He cannot let XY’s murderers go because he cannot do something against his own conscience in regards to this. He has to protect her. He will make the world safe for her. Too bad, if ZX wasn’t aiming so high to a position that I know XY would not want to be a part of (complicated palace intrigue is so not XY at all), I guess a part of me would want to root for them too.. to keep each other company as they have always been doing in their quiet alone time together.

      Alright. I love them all! Jing, Xiang Liu, and Zhuan Xu.. All in a different way. I’ll just enjoy my journey with Xiao Yao.

    • >.< and I can't help by recall a future chapter that will resonate with this chapter. So painful my heart hurts again. It is fortunate that Xiao Yao could hear when she was 'unconscious'.

  7. The wait was killing me
    cgecked the ite 100 times a day
    cried xiao yao xioa yao xiao yao…
    how is jing will he be ok
    so dam worried
    haaaaa the wait
    whrn I saw the update sighed so loudly.
    and am still sighing.

    • Dear Ran,

      Your comment is a mess – spelling, punctuation, sentence structure….

      but the emotion behind it is the exact same feeling that I have.
      So it made me smile and it (your comment) made me happy.

      Sighs, indeed….

  8. thank you for translating the work, good job, but next time can you be careful with the cover picture. don’t just randomly drop illustration from other works in( no offence)but it really messing with the solid images of the characters.

  9. Love the picture posted above. It takes my mind to all kind of imaginations. Is there any couple that can show us that passionate embrace in a drama. Xiang Liu is so cool…

  10. This picture is probably more suitable:
    http://i.imgur.com/1rR4dgd.jpg

    Only, DongHua wears purple and not white.

    Feng Long has quite the temper, which was unexpected. Why was he so angry anyway? It’s not as if he was in love with Xiao Yao, and he’s already good buddies with her cousin. Is a marriage alliance all that necessary?

    • I don’t think Feng Long was angry about the marriage thing.. My guess is that he felt betrayed by his good cousin buddy Jing.. My impression of Feng Long is that he is the Brotherhood kind of guy and not Love Conquers All kind of guy..Hopefully he comes around and accept Jing as his brother-buddy again..

      • Agreed!
        People forgetting that Feng Long does not know about Jing and XY at all prior to this, of course he feel betrayed for 2 reasons
        1/ Jing take away XY whom he wanted to marry. The guy is not a love-person at all, and only see XY as a good political wife. He see Jing as the person who snatch away what he wanted.
        2/ Jing is his dearest friend. He feel belittled by Jing for not telling him. To Feng Long, brotherhood trumped love. Hence, he was disappointed that Jing did not just “ask” XY from him earlier. If Jing did, Feng Long would willingly give up XY for Jing anytime. So he feel that Jing belittled him as a person, and his brotherhood to Jing.

  11. Okay! The fifteen years is up. She can let another man to walk into her heart again. But I won’t recommend Xiang Liu, he’s already mine. She can’t take him back. 🙂

  12. Because I am currently finishing up Once Promised, when Xiang Liu mentioned how he was saved by Gong Gong in this chapter… I realised he has so many years ahead of Xiao Yao & gang, and that this character was already around when Qi Yo was in his prime. Wow. I wished they had met. 2 awesome lovers.

  13. Thank you Capt Koala for your hardwork to translate and share this with us. I stick with XL and my love for him grows even more…

  14. XL saves her by giving her one of his souls. He loves her so much much but knows what cannot be. He asked her to erase the images from the mirror, as to forget him…bring tears to my eyes

    Thank you for the hard work Koala.

  15. Ms Koala.. you’re our translation goddess! Thank you! *bow*

    Again.. another great chapter that makes me cry and laugh so hard. I love XL more than ever. I hope he wont play the noble idiot card in the future chapters and be more forward of his feelings with XY.

    • If he isn’t the noble idiot he is (that I want to strangle sometimes), maybe I won’t love and admire him as much as I do.

  16. Thank you for your wonderful translation.When I re-read back the first few chapters,I wondering where was Xiao Yao jade necklace and why Ah Heng keep reminding her to keep save the necklace when she stashed her at Jade mountain and now we know the jade necklace kept her mother “medicine manual”!!That she learned her medicine and poison from her mother’s secret manual.I remember Grand Emperor asked Xiao Yao about the Flame Emperor “medical book” that her mom had..wish to know about the back story of Once Promised how Ah Heng got the both medical book.Maybe the poison one from Chi You?
    Jing oh Jing..you make me wanna to cry with your devotion but if you give up your everything,how are you going to protect XY in future? XY can’t transform her form anymore,can’t be Xiao Lui or anyone since Royal Mother rebirth XY real form.Sure Jing must wonder or suspect why people want to kill XY..
    It’s sad to listen to ZX childhood story..no wonder he want to retained the highest power to be able protect his love one.For XY,ZX is her safe heaven and family that she can go back to when she tired of travelling or play.She keep no big secret from ZX except some of the personal thingy she do with XL and Jing.I wonder when ZX have this special feeling for XY?? Hmmmm…maybe when he saw her at the rebirth in Jade mountain??
    XL oh XL why don’t you wait for XY when she woke up?? She expected to see you..XY was so dissapointed when XL was not there to greet her..I like XL to FFB forever so he can accompany XY to play and have fun like real couple.If XL and XY are human,then we can said their 37 years together under the sea can consider as married couple minus XY unconscious of course.
    now I’m abort from all ships and really enjoy this novel journey..

  17. oh!! what Feng Long said make me LOL so hard and confused..when did XY make any promise to marry him or date him?? I remember XY told ZX that she will never marry Feng Long and they never date even once.They always play and have fun together with others but never alone.When XY become FL’s women?? if he called XY as his woman than XL have more right to call XY as his love and gf,right? hahaha..I imagine all the sucking and embracing during the 37 years.oh!! my head full of Harlequin intimates discription…lol.. .Isn’t ZX imply too much to FL that in future XY will marry him since they are in the same boat?(future emperor and future official)

    • Clueless Feng Long asking dumb questions made me laugh out loud.. True that it was unreasonable of him to call XY his woman.. Having said that, I can understand why he is angry with Jing. I guess he felt betrayed by his closest friend. He did not know that Jing and XY had a lovely past together..

      Imagine you informed your best friend that you’re interested in Mr P. In fact your girl friends within your circle know your interests with Mr P and everyone seem to be supportive of you to pursue/profess your Mr P. One day you found out your engaged so-called best friend dating Mr P… Won’t you feel betrayed.. feeling very foolish and dumb… Mr P knows you like him and your best friend is having relationship with him…

      I guess let’s give Feng Long a break and hopefully he come around and accept it..

  18. ~sigh this chapter..it definitely made the wait sooooo worth it!! This is now my ultimate favorite chapter. Thank you Koala! ^^ I can’t help but love Xiang Liu more. He is so selfless giving her his life line or whatever you want to call it. This chapter makes me appreciate him even more. I don’t know about you guys but I have read the passage of him taking care of dear Xiao Yao about 4 times now and I cried all 4 times lol It’s just so bittersweet :'( I loved every moment of it! He shared such intimate moments with her that was beyond the skinship. <3 I weeped when Xiao Yao felt a surge of sadness when the powers were entering her body. Xiang Liu must have been so devasted at the time because no matter what he did it only seemed like she was slipping away. Why did he not see her just once?
    But I have a question, did Xiao Yao cry on Furball's back because of Xiang Liu or just because she was a live and could finally meet the people who love and are waiting for her? I wanna say it is because of Xiang Liu. It seemed she was almost hesitant to get off ?
    & poor boy Zhuan Xu~ Xiao Yao is so oblivious to his feelings. It's sort of heartbreaking because he just has to hold it all in. Xiao Yao can't see the obvious hurt or jealousy he feels when she is with another man.

      • Initially I thought it was Jing too, but I think given the time sequence I would say it is Xiang Liu. I assume by this time she was already with Xiang Liu while Jing is unconscious. I think using his heartbeat to guide hers while transferring spiritual powers to her will able her to stay a live but since none is working he becomes devasted.

      • I’ve re-read the passage so I guess it is Jing. Either ways I was heartbroken all over lol.

  19. waaaah…. thank you so much miss koala!! your post is really made my day! how come every chapter is better and more better then the previous chapter…
    in chapter 21, i can feel how strong and deep is the connection and love between the male lead’s for XY. here, chapter 22, i really can see XL love for XY is as strong and deep as ZX and jing. never expect XL cn be sooo romantic and caring beast demon…
    reaaally cant wait for next chapter…
    THANK YOU SO MUCH MISS KOALA, BECAUSE YOUR KINDNESS AND HARDWORK, I CAN READ SUCH A BEAUTIFUL AND GOOD CHINESE NOVEL!!

  20. What an intense chapter! Thank you, Koala, for translating yet again, I’ve given up catching up on the original till some day I have the energy to. I was looking forward to this chapter after XL took XY away.

    The 37 years was a really special time that XL enjoyed with XY, once in a lifetime. I really wonder how he fed her the blood… All those special moments moon gazing and ocean strolling, sigh.. I really liked that XY was able to hear him. Wonder if he knew she could hear him. Oh wow, side effect of the healing treatment is she gets his underwater breathing ability?! The last day when XL was going to wake her up was sad.. He started keeping his distance and disappeared before she woke. It does seem that he might have been able to wake her sooner if he wanted, perhaps he kept her there longer for more complete healing.. Hence his question whether she would hate him if a Jing died. I think his first question to her whether she would hate him is related to that incident when she declared he is not suitable to enter her dreams in response to why she would not get air from his mouth. That 37 years their intimacy level was way beyond that, definitely qualified for entering her dreams. Maybe it has! Dense XY, his cover worked. Her heart’s contents was confirmed by her disappointment; her mind was satisfied by the relief.

    Does anyone have thoughts on who it was, XL or Jing, when XY first felt a strong heartbeat leading her own weak one, then the power coursing through her body to sustain her heartbeat. I think it’s XL more likely with the bug effect and his transferring of power. I did also wonder whether it was Jing who was holding her close and protecting from fire, and also transferring power.

    XL fed XY his soul blood, what a sacrifice! That perhaps will eat into and lower his spiritual power significantly, reduce his lifespan? I think that is what it might mean to exchange his life for XY. I can’t quite relate to him losing one of his nine lives…

    Jing went through another near death experience. I’m afraid ZX is right and Jing won’t be able to just stay by XY side so easily as he desires.

    Mmmm, ZX, he was hiding his jealousy over XY caring for Jing, and concerned if XL took advantage of XY. Wonder why he doesn’t tell XY, perhaps he feels he has no right since he is not good husband material.

    Yet again enjoyed the discourses and thoughts of the community here reading between the lines. Thank you!

    • That aching in XY’s heart before she alighted from Furball must have been an amalgation of her own longing for XL and XL’s resigned sadness over her departure from the bug effect. Mmmm, I guess she still doesn’t understand the bug effect. Oh and I’m still very curious about the bug. Why doesn’t she feel it regularly when XL goes through something? Didn’t she say that as owner of the bug she should be the one sensing him and not the other way round? I’m thinking XL is able to control the bug and mask what happens to him. He knows way more than she does about the bug.

    • Koala explained above that the second heart beat is Xiang Liu while the sad spiritual powers belonged to Jing. Inititally I believed it to be Xiang Liu but since Koala is the one who has access to and understands Chinese I can only rely on her. Then again I guess as Xiao Yao said bc she had no strength to find out who the spiritual owner was she only followed the beat of Xiang Liu’s heart. Haha but deep inside I still want to believe it is Xiang Liu 🙂

    • How did Xiang Liu transfer his blood… is this even a question? Mouth-to-mouth of course!

      And Koala is correct in saying the spiritual power was Jing while the guiding heart is Xiang Liu. No doubt on that!

      Why does Xiao Yao not feel the effect of the bug on Xiang Liu given she’s the owner? Well, because Xiang Liu is on a much higher level of spiritual power than her! Remember he is a demon with many hundreds of years of practice. He is able to mask whatever feelings he has, and prevent them from transmitting to Xiao Yao; it is actually a way to protect her. Imagine if he goes to war, and he gets injured… Xiao Yao will prolly feel the excruciating pain until she wants to die, and our poor boy doesn’t want that okay?

  21. Thanks Captain K!
    I have a few questions maybe someone can enlighten me. XL asked XY if she will hate him to the core if Jing dies. Why would he asked that. Has XL keeping XY all to himself the past 37 yrs?
    Next question…when XY on Furball she was crying was it because she is missing XL or is she crying because reality is hitting her or bad memories of the torture moment!

    • @Maymay your 1st question, please look through the comments. There are 2 reasons, one which @lume has stated. The other reason, we are all currently wondering, and hopefully someone can answer?

      Your 2nd question. Imagine yourself in a sub-conscious state, knowing fully well you have spend many many many many years alone with this person, yet there was no way to communicate. What is the 1st thing you’d do when you can finally open your eyes & move? Yes, you’ll look for the person and tell him things & also to find out what has been going on in the world right now. But Xiang Liu is cruelly not giving her this chance to grow attached to him. She knows it, and is crying for this loss of chance.

  22. also XL asking XY if she will hate him if J died is probably because of the fact that XL knew J was dying and that XY was the only one who can save J? like what if XL did not do anything about it at all?

    which obviously did not happen because XL did wake up XY in time.

    XY hating XL is NOT about XL not waking up XY sooner – i don’t think it is even possible for XL to wake up XY any sooner, XY barely tolerated the treatment for waking her up at that time… and that is only because she is already recovering.

  23. I think this chapter made it obvious that while XY’s heart belongs to XL (literally and figuratively), her logical side chooses the security with Jing. When she realized that Jing would rather die than be without her, the walls around her heart crumbled because she knew he would rather accompany her in death than live without her. This is much different from her visceral, honest, and emotional responses to XL. General Gong Gong, just release him from his fealty already!!!

    • i beg to disagree, xl may be in xy’s heart but so is jing.
      when xl said to xy that jing is dying , xy doesnt want jing to die.
      in that scene, xl realize that truly xy cares for jing so he let go .
      there are many xy~jing scenes that xy’s heart skipped a beat for jing.
      the hair, d jealousy and many more. i think those two leads occupy a space. in Xy heart but only in jing that xy do all the physical touches like kissing. xy kiss jings leg scar and thats where jing realize that truly xy loves him now.

  24. What Tu Shan Jing name represented is not just wealth that rivaled a kingdom but a power that could influence the world. ” I am in awe of Jing’s status but I am amazed, dumbstruck, in seventh heaven all those adjectives. just because he can throw them all for a woman. damn Lucky XY !
    This cemented my love for this male lead.
    i lorrrvvvveee you ye shi qi!

  25. I’m a little afraid to continue reading. From the comments of all the chapter, it seems like things won’t be promising for my Xiang Liu ship..I want Xiang Liu to just straight up tell her how he feels and see how she reacts. I can’t help but feel that Jing is ahead of the other leads mainly because he is the only one openly expressing his feelings for her. But then I guess you can argue that his forwardness with his love shows that he is the only one that is willing to fully commit himself and put her above all other things. But then he is still controlled by his familial obligations so I can’t help but feel like he is all talk before action and is inhibiting chances for the other guys by calling dibs on Xiao Yao! I wished he would have just pursued her without making her wait on him; Jing is too smart and sneaky at keeping himself in her thoughts.. AHHHHH!!!! I am so conflicted!!! This story is so good that I am loving my frustration because it means that I am very into the story. But no matter what, I want Xiang Liu!!

  26. I am sooo sad and my heart ached for XL. If he dies and doesn’t get together with XY, I swear I will hate this novel. OK, just joking just to emphasize how much I have fallen in love with his character and his image … long flowing white hair, white gown, beyond comparison beautiful face, mysterious, steely cold eyes yet when nursing XY, the gentlest words and touch. Ooooh…. swooning all over. kekkekekekee.

  27. Interesting that Jing knows in his heart that Bei/XL is more suitable for XY. A man with love in his heart sees clearly. I feel sorry for him but my heart belongs to XL. 🙂

  28. I’m truly in awe of the love the 3 male leads have for XY, you can’t measure it because they all love her to their fullest capacity.

    YX’s life and love is what motivates Jing to keep on living, she’s his life and he’s willing to throw away his life in a moment’s notice just to accompany her, silent & grandeur. Jing, Jing, Jing…

    Zhuan Xu is probably the least favored among the 3 between readers but I’ve always had a terrible soft spot for him and liked him comparatively more than Xiang Liu. Like XY, he’s capable, cold & ruthless but his motivation for power stemmed from him being utterly powerless in the past & losing all the people that mattered to him. A’Heng told him that XY would return to him when he’s capable of protecting her and that’s what he’s been aspiring to do…
    I honestly love him to death and hope that he’ll have a lifetime worth of beautiful memories to fond over even if he’s not the ultimate winner of her love in the end.

    This chapter marked XL’s turning point for me, his gentleness as he helped XY to recuperate is enough to convince anyone he’s worthy of her love.

    Tong Hua’s breadth of electrifying male characters just…wow

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