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Lost You Forever Chapter 34: The Malevolent East Wind, the Fleeting Pleasure — 64 Comments

  1. Such a moving and bittersweet chapter. Although I’m cheering for Jing and Xiao Yao – bless their hearts, they deserve to be happy and together for once – my heart twisted at Zhuan Xu’s reaction to the “good news.” He loves XY to the point of pain, yet he’s forced to hide his emotions in a mask of indifference. Also, poor Yi Yang. What a ruthless, lovesick, hateful yet pitiable and understandable character. I really felt for her ending. Hou definitely deserved worse.

    • Tong Hua did a good job of showing us Yi Yang’s despair and her fate but I can’t muster up any sympathy for her. I liked understanding her better but that doesn’t give her a pass. Just because Hou sacrificed her and she accepted the consequences of her misdeeds doesn’t make up for all the horrible things she did and tried to do. If anything the murder of Hou’s wife is more than enough reason for her full punishment. Her love for Hou isn’t the end all and be all of the world that makes it somehow sympathetic that she would be so hell bent on getting rid of all obstacles to give herself a happy ending with Hou. We need to remember that she ALSO wanted power of being the clan leader’s wife. She refused to let Jing end the engagement. If she just wanted Hou and love then she could end the engagement and lower herself to be Hou’s concubine. But no, she wanted it ALL and for that I have no sympathy for her but enjoy seeing her character fleshed out more.

      • I agree…expansion on her is good but she’s murdered innocent people and attempted to rape Jing to secure he position…so no pity for her getting caught for her wrongs. Too bad Hou is a snake and slithered away unscathed

  2. Well…when Xiao Yao decides to be proactive and take a hand in her future with Jing there is quite the difference

    Amazing work translating this…it is SO LONG that I truly believe your hands cramped and your arms did feel like falling off like you said

    • I’ve been whining to anyone around me to massage my arms for the last few days….

      When Xiao Yao set her mind to do something she is as take charge and ruthless as Zhuan Xu can be. They are both the Yellow Emperor’s grandchildren in mind and personality.

      I did think that Jing’s plight got resolved too quickly. It was like 10 chapters of dragged out crap and then voila! Xiao Yao cures his illness AND resolves the biggest mess in his life with Hou and Yi Yang. That’s it?

      Ultimately Xiang Liu remains the catalyst in everything that happens to Xiao Yao’s direction in life. If he hadn’t make her run away from the wedding then she would have never had the one open conversation with Jing to set everything into motion. Xiang Liu gave up his Fang Feng Bei persona and freedom that came with being Bei all so Xiao Yao could get her man back? I think that was a big sacrifice but also a very worthwhile result to come from it.

      • I do think giving up Bei is a big sacrifice on Xiang Liu’s part. But eventually Fang Feng Bei has to die, Xiang Liu couldn’t masquerade as him forever. I love this chapter Koala! This also makes me wonder that if it was this simple to resolve this, why couldn’t they do this earlier, like said 6 chapters ago? Though I must give it to Jing, he would really do about anything to follow Xiao Yao’s whims.

        For me, something bigger than Jing and Xiao Yao’s reunion, is that this chapter is very telling of Zhuan Xu and Xiao Yao’s relationship. This chapter highlights just how special Xiao Yao is to Zhuan Xu, adn how different he treats her compare to his consorts. It is the little things they do together in this chapter. Xiao Yao says that she sees Zhuan Xu everyday. I bet those moments are the little daily happiness for Zhuan Xu. There are no honeyed words. Zhuan Xu acts like a spoiled rich boy around her. I wonder if this new turn in the story will change the relationship between Zhuan Xu and Xiao Yao especially since you hint of Zhuan Xu’s ambition for Gao Xing.

      • I think that shows that if Xiao Yao had been involved from the start this wouldn’t have happened…but both failed and they begin again. She deliberately never reacted for years and just enjoyed Jing’s pain while hating herself in the dark. I think Xiang Liu felt all those feelings.

        Xiang Liu knew Bei would have to die eventually…in this way he stopped Xiao Yao from a ridiculous marriage and perhaps help her with Jing and also secured support for his forces so I know he thinks it’s worth it

      • Totally agree with you. For me, this has been the most disappointing chapter, because everything got resolved far too easily. If it was this easy, why didn’t it get resolved ages ago. Firstly, I cannot believe that Jing, with his extensive spy network, wouldn’t have known about the attempts on ZXs life by his then fiancée. Secondly YY gave up too easily. She has spent decades scheming and manipulating, and she doesn’t have anything to refute the charges?
        So now the weak Jing is back in the picture? Well XY had better hope that nothing else occurs to bring out that weak side and he abandons her again for “the greater good”.

        ZX is in a really bad state, isn’t he. I feel that if he said anything to XY she would agree to becoming his secret lover, just because he needs her.

    • It’s from a poem stanza by poet Lu Yo. All of Lost You Forever chapter headings are from famous Chinese poems.

      东风恶,欢情薄。一怀愁绪,几年离索。错,错,错。

      The malevolent east wind, the fleeting pleasure, one cup filled with sorrow, the years apart, mistake, mistake, mistake.

      It was written by Lu Yo who was forced to divorce his wife when his mom objected to her. Years later he ran into her with her then husband and was lamenting his past mistakes and how the east wind so coldly blew away his pleasurably memories of the past to show him the cruel reality of the decision he made.

      Used here it’s clearly referring to Yi Yang and her realizing the mistake of loving Hou and doing what she did for her.

      • that was such a beautiful poem. yeah poor yi yang. Hou is a total bastard. he never loved anyone except himself.

      • I totally think Hou DID love Yi Yang, at least more than any other woman in his life and as much as he could love a woman. She understood and shared in his hatred and disgust with Jing, how could he not love her. The problem is that he’s fundamentally a selfish bastard with no capacity for empathy other than feeling sorry for his own pain from the past.

      • Thanks for the explanation! It adds so much to the depth and understanding of the chapter!

  3. Wow weee, Thank you sooo much Ms Koala, have been looking forward to this new chapter. Finally the secrets of Hou and FFYY are out, but what a B*****D Hou was to blame it all on FFYY, she at least finally realized what a slimeball lowlife he is! So now Jing can openly court Xiao yiao, and Zhuan Xu is now hurting more than ever and regretting his silent longing and secret love for XY. What will Xiang Liu feel when he finds out about them two getting back together, he already knows via the lovers bug because of her joyful heart…..

    • I really don’t understand how Yi Yang could have ever believed that Hou was not a total bastard. Which decent person tortures his own half-brother for three years and then tries repeatedly to kill him? It’s like loving a rapist and then wondering why he cheats on you? Hou is a horrible person, of course due to what Jing’s mom did, but how Yi Yang fell for his lies makes me less understanding of her choice to trust him and then feeling betrayed afterwards like she couldn’t believe he turned out to be giant scum towards her as well. Hou isn’t just cruel and vindictive, he turns out to be a coward as well to save his own hide. Jing should feel icky to be related to him.

      • I trust that if Jing thinks that Hou has a soul to redeem, then Hou is worth a second, third, or even fourth chance. Hou may be a B*****d and got off lightly up to this chapter, but let’s not forget the years of abuse he suffered under Jing’s mother. I think he genuinely loved his younger brother for Jing to reciprocate his repect. Althought he has changed, it is due to circumstances, and if Jing forgives him, no reason why we should not forgive him.

        Thank you for the wonderfully, long, beautiful chapter. Although it has been several months already, reading this book, be it in English or Chinese, always gives one food for thought.

  4. I truly pity zhuan xu. why yellow emperor wont let zhuan xu to just say it out loud to xiao yao? and why the hell that old geezer become so melancholic. does the poem stanza by lu yo also applies to yellow emperor, since he seems regret his life?

  5. Can I say how much I dislike Xing Yue right now? It’s amazing how this character developed to be totally dislikable. I didn’t even dislike Huo Cheng from Da Mo Yao because I think she was royally screwed by Meng Yue. Huo Cheng knew she couldn’t get love because Meng Yue ruined it for her. So she opted for the path of power. However Xing Yue has the empress position and wants Zhuan Xu’s love and affection. It makes me miss BBJX where I actually love most, if not all the female characters.

    • Do you mean Huo Cheng Jun from Yun Zhong Ge? And her messed up relationship with Meng Jue? I think Cheng Jun is an amazingly written female antagonist with very pitiable motivations. Yang Rong will probably steal the drama as HCJ when the YZG drama ever gets aired. Yes, Meng Jue did royally fuck with her emotions and mind and it was THAT which sent HJC on her epic quest to destroy Yun Ge. Meng Jue accepted that he messed up though. Xing Yue is the typical bitter woman, angry because the man she loves doesn’t love and worship her. She’s way worse than Yi Yang. I think LYF has well written female leads, it’s not always good people but they are nicely fleshed out. Ah Nian is adorable. BBJX was about Ruo Xi having all close female friends and a beloved sister but Xiao Yao can’t have close female friends due to her upbringing so it doesn’t make sense to have rootable female friendships here. I also adore brash Shen Xing who made Xiao Yao’s bow for her, if there was time she would be a cool friend for XY to hang out with.

  6. Thank you!!!!!! Wow, this chapter was a doozy. You’re right that Jing’s conflict wrapped up so quickly. I feel like YiYang and Hou might still have dastardly plans against Jing because it seems to abrupt. Thank you for translating and looking forward to the last stretch!

  7. Finally my beloved Jing and Xiao Yao have their great time again!! May this last forever 🙂
    Waiting for the next step of their lives!

  8. Thanks for translating this chapter! I’m glad that Xiao Yao and Jing can be back together again after spending so many years apart! I love how Jing is so dense he’s not sure if XY was agreeing to get back to him when she smiles. He had to ask “Is that a Yes?” Hahaha!!

    Can someone explain to me why the yellow emperor recognize the gorilla mirror? Why is his face filled with regret when he sees the mirror?

  9. Thank you Koala so much for translating this Very Looongggg chapter! I can imagine all the typing till the arms are flailing! It is such an intense chapter and I’m surprised that this happened so early in the third book. I did not expect the Hou/FFYY threat to be resolved so quickly within one chapter. Wow, that makes me wonder what juicy plot is coming up next.

    Poor ZX, if he had stayed back that evening, he would have drunk himself silly and start yelling for his true love, something the Yellow Emperor surely wanted to avoid hence quickly shooing him to leave. ZX’s only release and being himself is when he is with XY. He must feel so ripped to hear of her restored relationship with J.

    Indeed the huge sacrifice that XL gave to kill off FFB. So all these could happen. So XY could explore other worlds on her ow. What pain he must go thru now as she reunites with J. I still lament the loss of FFB as does XY.

  10. Wow the story could end here.

    When XY lent the mirror to Jing, did it occur to anyone that Jing would be able to view the previous memories XY stored there of her experiences with XL? Will that be a source of conflict in a future chapter?

  11. Thanks Miss K. Really enjoyed this chapter. XY deserves a happy ending but I do thing TH wrapped up Jing’s problems too neatly. However, great to have the OTP together again. What about my precious XL? What’s left for him?

  12. I’m a little confused… Why does the Tu Shan clan have a god that they sacrifice to? I thought they were all gods themselves?

    • Gods in Chinese mythology are more powerful and longer living than humans but are not immortal. They also have many of the same cultural norms, hence the worship of deceased ancestors or spiritual mystical beings that protect against evil or bring good fortune.

  13. This chapter’s ending seems like a calm before the storm. It’s unsettling. Would you mind explain why the yellow emperor recognizes the mirror?

  14. Normally I wouldn’t answer since this is just the start of volume 3 and such things usually gets revealed later on. But this particular tidbit actually is never ever touched upon again so we don’t ever find out why. But of course its something meaningful to him.

    C-netizens have speculated that the full story behind the mystical gorilla mirror would have been fleshed out in the middle novel that Tong Hua hasn’t written yet.

    Tong Hua’s first novel of the Legend of the Mountain and Seas trilogy was Once Promised. But Lost You Forever is reportedly her third and final novel in the trilogy but she skipped novel 2 to write novel 3 because of inspiration reasons.

    Novel 2 is supposed to center around Sheng Nong General Hou Tu and Shao Hao (The Grand Emperor) and the events after Once Promised. It hasn’t been written yet and likely never will.

    Tong Hua also planned her Desert Romance trilogy to have three books but she’s only written two in Da Mo Yao (Ballad of the Desert) and Yun Zhong Ge (Song in the Clouds). The third novel is supposed to be a prequel to the first two called Xie Yo Qu (Tune of the Sorrowful) about Princess Xie Yo but also hasn’t been written.

  15. Thanks Koala x million. I really, really love this story. I am so happy that Xiao Yao and Jing are together again. It was a long journey. I hope nothing happens to separate them again. Hope there will be more sweet moments between the two. Since this is just the beginning of Book 3, I feel like something else will happen. Hope Zhuan Xu does not get jealous. There is only so much he can hold it in. I find the Yellow Emperor funny, that he seems to be sighing with Zhuan Xu all the time. Your hard work of translating is SO appreciated!

  16. Thank you so much for your hard work in translating this, it felt long just reading it!

    Phew! Finally the secret is out!! What a relief, though I do agree that for something that has been dragged out for chapters (or decades in the novels timeline) it seemed to be a resolution that came too quickly and conveniently.

    In their happiness I couldn’t help but think, as their hearts soared in happy reunion, Xiang Liu’s heart would also soar.. But his gut would sink cuz being smart as he is, he’d know what that feeling meant…. Let’s not even start with Zhang Xu’s turmoil… *Sobs*

    Tong Hua is brilliant and evil like that! She never hands you a win without taking from somewhere else.

  17. I do appreciate that readers here are more level headed & more interested in the progress of the story rather than fight meaningless war about ‘ships’. Thank you Koala, hwaiting to the end!

  18. ‘Xiao Yao, I’m here’ – how sweet those words! Finally, they are reunited! Quietly, gently, with such sweetness and happiness.

  19. Thank you ockoala for this chapter
    This was a happy chapter
    Will XL & ZH confess thier feeling to XY in volume three ? Or she will know it by thier actions ?

  20. oohh i ache for your wrist and arms plight Madam Koala, indeed thank you soooo much. i love your translations, if only Author Tong~hua knows you are doing her a great favor by spreading her works to the non~chinese speaking readers, she will also be eternally grateful to you as all of us here are.
    i really love the latest chapters, im so happy with the progress of jing~xy relationship. eversince book 1 i have never wavered in my ship. i went down with them, i was depress reading d misery of jings love. now, am all smiles, even dreaming of my happy couple. beautiful chapter. epic line “im here” 🙂

  21. Jing’s part has come back!! I really enjoy re-reading this chapter. Sea of emotions- frightening, shocking, n loving lol… However, I’m dying of waiting for the new chapter. Plz Ms. Koala!! New chapter 35!

  22. Suffering withdrawal symptoms and hanging around here.. Trying to wait patiently. Thanks Koala for your special efforts doing this!

  23. From 5th to 25th, twenty days have been passed, yet u cannot release even one chapter. Lol… U really know how to make people die of waiting!!! Release soon plz, Ms. Koala

  24. Ms. Koala, I’m wondering if you are a mom with a kid going to college this year. You were busy around April during the time I was busy taking my son to look at colleges before making up his mind. You are busy now while I’m busy trying to put things together for my son to get ready to go to college. I know you are busy all the time but still… Keep going! I can’t stop checking if you put another chapter up. FIGHTING!!

  25. Thank you Koala for a great chapter.

    I don’t trust Jing for two reasons.
    1. being he met XY when his self image was destroyed. He clung onto XY as if to a life raft. So what will happen once he reestablished himself? Would that person still want/need/desire XY?
    2. I find Jing’s character inconsistent. I can’t reconcile the cold businessman who sold supplies to opposing side of a war, and scoffed that tradition is only man made; with the forgiving wishy washy person who married to preserve his families’ integrity, and in the process he hurt XY. To me it would make for sense if Jing was calculating and manipulating all along. Or if the author could expand on the political sway around the Feng family. As it is I find Jing’s explanation fall short of someone who could love XY all her life.
    On the other hand, I can not find fault with how he dealt with Hou, YY, and nephew.
    I feel sad for XY because she is so desperate for love and a safe place that she willing ignore danger signs. I really really dislike the idea that without a man, life is not worth living. For example, you marry the love of your life, then he dies, now what …. you still have to live for yourself!!

    • I don’t have the same opinion as you so I want to give my 2cents into the discussion.

      1. For Jing, Xiao Yao was his “light and saviour” in the time where he gave himself completly up, so his devotion to her is understandable. So no matter what he won’t forget the kindness showed upon him and he already has “reestablished” himself to a certain content.

      2. I see it like this, in business he is a smart and sly fox, in private life he is someone with a kind heart who can forgive.
      since his birth it was expected that he would be the future-leader so all the necessary knowledge and methods were something he grew up with. So with all this knowledge and his smarts he can lead the clan.
      In the chinese culture “filiality” is a very big and important thing, it can’t really be compared to the western-style. Jin can give himself for Xiao Yao up, but he can’t give his “familiy” up, so you have to decide family or love, what would you choose? Because he was so kind he doesn’t want to hurt his beloved ones.

      And yes, I just love how Xiao Yao is, she deserve love, security and more, she is one of my favourite heroines ever.
      (like you can see I’m a Jing-Fan, but I also very like Liang, he is so caring *swoon*, but in case of Xiao Yao, Jing would be the best choice since he can give Xiao Yao what she most wants)

      • Well, it would best if I’m wrong. So I can’t wait to read the rest of the story and see how everything plays out. But up to this point I don’t buy the explanations. Actions speak louder than words. I very much like how Jing showed compassion towards his nephew, so I’ll give him that.

    • Hmmm

      1. I think it’s safe to say Jing has been re-established for over 70 years ever since he reassumed his original position in the Tu Shan Clan and then became Clan Leader

      2. In business and life people often have different personas…also when Yi Feng was found to be pregnant there was going to be NO WAY to stop the wedding with no proof of infidelity and as long as his Grandmother was still alive

      • Here’s how I see it, and I partially agree with you.
        1. I was trying to say that my initial hesitation on Jing was the fact that he was messed up. Up to the point where XZ got married, everyone who knew Jing prior all made comments to the effect that Jing was not like he used to be. After XZ’s marriage, I would imagine that he had regained his sense of self and power, but he didn’t appear much or did much in the story so I still can’t see who he truly is.

        2. If you mean personas as in facade (a mask) then I agree with you. People can be different in public vs private life. But you can’t change the core value in a person. A liar is going lie to everyone in his life. It’s just a matter of how he goes about it.

        YY was found to be pregnant, and I agree that was difficult. Even if, let’s say, he sent his fox clone to meet her every time. A daughter of a prominent family is pregnant and claims the baby is his, he was really in a bind.
        Here my beef with Jing. Starting from the beginning of the story, the way he retold the story of how he cross path with XY. He said he was so hopeless he was ready to die, he only wanted a final moment laying in the sun. He could hardly move, but somehow he did crawled his way to XY’s door. From the description wasn’t wood pile far from the door?
        People like the Emperor of Gao Xing and XL do not believe Jing is straight forward and innocent.
        Jing claims he has to marry YY, since he believes she is innocent. But how can? He has been on the bad end of her two face abuse. He knows first hand the schemer she is.
        Jing was tortured by his brother and left for dead, followed by more assassination attempts. And he has a hard time believing Hou will do another evil act?
        When XY and FFB left the gambling den visited the donkey meat eating dive, and Jing and his friend happen to head the same way. How can he not know she was there? He’s a master at tracking. He even found XY in XL’s army camp back in chp2.
        There are other off moments for me, but I can’t remember them right now.
        Something I don’t understand in this chapter. How does he send the mirror with an astro projection of his little fox? I know readers can’t answer that. I just can’t understand.

        BUT here’s the other thing, he seems really sincere. This character really made me scratch my head. And isn’t it funny that XL is nine heads, Jing is associated with nine tails, (uhm what is XZ? I don’t want to said out loud!)

        Anyways looking forward to what future chapters will reveal.

  26. Koala! I miss your translations. I troll everyday in hopes that one chapter will appear. I know this must be long an tedious task. I understand if you chose not to translate anymore, but if not can’t you spoil the story for me? LOL

  27. I saw it coming!!! That Zhen is actually Hou’s and Yi Yang’s love child, I was just waiting for it to reveal it whenever.

    I didn’t see Hou’s character and his wants until Xiao Yao pointed it out. He did all that to prove that he’s better than Jing in every way. But the truth was, he wasn’t. He’s a coward, and should therefore end up dead for everything he did to Jing. and to push her under the bus to save his own pride and skin. I feel no sympathy for any of them.

    Right now I’m just happy to see more of Xiao Yao and Jing. I ship this couple so much!!!

    Thank you so much Koala for your translations. It keeps me wanting for more, after I finished Da mo yao. Thank you for feeding this “drug” to me. 🙂

  28. Xing yue attitude towards xiao yao is quite scary.she is sarcastic towards xiao yao bcoz she knew deep down zhuan xu love xiao yao and i think a jealous woman is dangerous bcoz she might try to get rid of her..right now she only afraid of zhuan xu..
    I’m not sure whether zhuan xu can endure when xiao yao getting married to jing..he even jealous with the water lily given by jing and get rid it from her body..can he really just accept xiao yao to become someone else posession??i mean he may be can accept her marrying fl bcoz she do not love him but marrying jing is different bcoz they love each other..i can’t wait for this part..

  29. Im way too used to ruthless and can do anything for his wife kind of ML from reading korean novel and this sort of ML like Jing is definitely a fresh breather. No matter how glad i am to see that things ended with no violence, but it also kinda leaves a bitter aftertaste seeing Huo with such a light punishment.

  30. I just can’t seem to connect this Empress Xing Yue with the maiden Xing Yue. While I agree she might want everybody below her, she was quite sincere in her treatment of Xiao Yao before, so her suddenly acting like any bitchy empress is so jarring.

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